I had to trust him.
Yoss kissed me again.
“Go to the bridge. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
Lies. Lies. Lies.
Why did my heartbeat sound like a warning?
Yoss walked me to the street where our paths would diverge. I would head to the bridge. He would head somewhere else.
“Where are you going?” I asked again.
“I told you. I just want to get some stuff together. I don’t want you to have to worry about things. I want to take care of you. Will you let me do that?” Yoss took my hands and kissed my raw knuckles.
“You don’t have to take care of me, Yoss,” I argued, frowning. When would he stop looking at me as a defenseless girl? When would he realize that he didn’t need to go to the ends of the earth to keep me happy?
“I know I don’t have to.” Kiss. “I want to.” Kiss. “When everything else goes to shit, I can be glad that I made sure you were happy and safe. That’s all that matters to me.” Kiss.
“Don’t be long,” I pleaded.
“I’ll be there, Imi. Wait for me.”
Promises. Promises.
Always promises.
He went his way. I went mine.
Separate paths.
I should have known that was our fate.
“Where have you been?” Karla demanded angrily when she saw me approach. She and Shane were sitting underneath the bridge, hands held over an open fire. It was unusually desolate. As if everyone had hidden themselves away.
“Yoss and I went to the hospital. To look for Bug,” I explained, sitting down beside them.
“He’s dead. Di told us,” Shane said dully, his hair matted on the side of his face. I saw an old cut healing on his forehead. Dried blood on his cheeks. His clothes were grubby and covered in soot from the fire. Karla was huddled in her jacket, her hands tucked between her thighs for warmth.
“I can’t believe that little fuck is gone,” Karla remarked sadly, and the three of us absorbed the weight of that statement and what it meant.
“Do you know what happened? With the fire?” I asked, taking a piece of bread that Shane offered me from a torn bag.
“I heard it was one of the fires that were lit inside. The can fell over and a bunch of shit went up in flames. Someone else said it was a cigarette and lighter fluid. Who knows? The cops have The Pit cordoned off. No one can get in or out,” Shane replied, his mouth full with stale bread.
“Where’s Di?” I asked, looking around. She was the one I really wanted to see. I cared about Di. I didn’t want to leave without making sure she was all right.
Karla blew into her palms and rubbed them together. “She was here earlier but then said she had to go. She wasn’t good. She blames herself for Bug. She thinks she could have gotten him out somehow.”
“But that’s ridiculous! It’s not her fault!” I exclaimed, my heart hurting for my friend.
“That’s what we told her. When Bug was passed out, he was dead weight. And he wasn’t a little guy. He was tall and gangly as fuck. No way could a little thing like Di get him out of the warehouse. And if she had tried we wouldn’t have lost just one friend last night.” Shane stared into the fire, the smoke curling up lazily towards the sky.
“When will she be back?” I hated the thought of Di out there feeling guilty for things that she had no control over. She looked so tough with her shaved head and tattoos, but she wasn’t. She had a heart that could be broken just like the rest of us.
“Don’t know. She may have split town. Probably smart considering there’s fuck all to stay around here for,” Karla snapped, grabbing the bag of bread and taking the last two pieces for herself.
It started to rain. Not much, just enough to make us wet. As much as I hated the cold, miserable damp, I was glad it wasn’t snowing anymore.
“Where’s Yoss?” Karla asked, tossing the now empty bread bag into the fire.
“He went to get some stuff. Uh…well…” I stuttered.
“Just spit it out. What’s your problem?” Karla glared at me. She was being particularly crabby. Not that I blamed her. I couldn’t summon up my usual annoyance with her attitude. We had all been through a lot. We were all grieving. Some allowances could be given for that.
“Yoss and I are leaving today. We’re getting out of town,” I finally got out.
Neither Shane or Karla said anything. The only sounds were the roar of traffic overhead and the crackling of the fire.
“Where are you going?” Shane asked after too long without saying anything.
“I don’t know,” I told him and Karla snickered hatefully.
“You don’t know? That sounds like a great plan,” she sneered.
“Karla, give it a rest, will ya?” Shane muttered tiredly.
“So Yoss sent you to come break the news to the kids. Isn’t that nice of him?” Karla spat out. She clenched her hands into fists. Her anger was wild and out of control and clearly focused on the wrong thing. Me.