Next to Me

"Go ahead."

I march back to the kitchen, determined to make her talk to me.

"Nash." She's startled to see me and drops her rolling pin. "What are you doing here? You can't be back here."

"Lou said I could." I stand right beside her. "So you want to tell me why you haven't spoken to me in days?"

"I've been busy." She goes to pick up her rolling pin but I reach over and grab it. "Give it back. I'm supposed to be working."

"You were supposed to be working this morning too and you didn't show up. You're obviously not sick, so what's your excuse?"

"I told you, I was busy."

"Busy doing what?"

She hesitates, gazing off to the side.

"Callie, what is it? Is this about putting everything back the way it was? Because I'm not here to talk about that, so if that's why you didn't show up this morning, then—"

"It wasn't that. That's not why I didn't show up."

"Then what is it? Just tell me."

She takes a breath. "Last Saturday, with everything that happened, I forgot to get the mail."

"Yeah? So?"

"So I got it this morning before breakfast and when I looked through it I saw a letter addressed to my mom. It was from someone my mom went to college with. She invited her to some kind of reunion. I don't know how she got our address but when I saw the letter, I broke down. I know it's just a letter, but—"

"You don't have to explain," I say, pulling her into my arms. "It sucks when people don't know. It's just another reminder that..."

"She's gone," she says.

There was a finality to her tone, like she's finally allowing herself to believe it. Does that mean she'll start letting go? Start living her life again? God, I hope so.

She keeps hold of me for a moment before backing away. I'd like to take that as a sign she's no longer mad at me about Saturday, but it could be that she held on because she needs to be comforted after seeing that letter.

"Did she leave a phone number?" I ask. "The woman who wrote the letter?"

She nods. "Yeah. She asked my mom to call her. I have to tell her...but I don't think I can do it. Not yet. I'm still—"

"I'll do it. I'll call and tell her."

"You don't have to. I just need more time. I know it sounds crazy, but just saying the words out loud, I..." Her voice trails off.

I hold her hand. "It's not crazy. I told you what a hard time I have telling people about Becky, and that was almost eight years ago. I'll take care of this, okay? I'll do it today. Where's the letter?"

"It's at home."

"Can you give me your key so I can go get it?" I hold my hand out but she doesn't give me the key. "Callie, I promise I'll go in the house, get the letter, and leave. I won't touch anything."

She reaches in her jeans pocket and pulls out her keys and gives me the house key. "I'll stop by your house after work and get it. Thanks for doing this."

"It's no problem." I give her hand a squeeze. "I'm here for you, Callie. Anything you need. All you have to do is ask. I'll see you soon."

On the way out, I pass Lou at the counter.

"Nash," he says, stopping me. "Everything okay in there?" He hitches his thumb toward the kitchen. "She came in here this morning not looking so good. I asked her what the problem was, but she wouldn't tell me."

"I talked to her. I think she's feeling better now."

"Good to hear." He smiles. "You two dating yet?"

I smile back. "Not yet. But I'm hoping. I'll see you later, Lou."

I go in Callie's house and see the letter on the kitchen table. It reads just like she said, telling her mom about the reunion and how great it'll be to see everyone again. It came at the worst possible time. I'm trying to get Callie to accept that her parents are gone and then she gets a letter written as though her mom is still alive.

I take the letter and stuff it in my pocket, and on my way out, I notice the Patterson book isn't on the table. And the knitting basket isn't on the floor. I told Callie I wouldn't touch anything but I didn't say I wouldn't look around. I walk over to the corner where the bin of toys used to be but it's not there anymore.

A grin lights up my face. "You did it, Callie. Holy shit, you really did it."

I walk down the hall to Ben's room. The door is only open a crack, so I push it open all the way and see the toy bin that used to be in the living room. It's sitting in the corner. I go over and peek inside. The toy cars that were on the dresser are now in the bin, along with the stuffed animals that used to be on the floor. As I glance around the room, I see that all the toys have been put away except for a stuffed monkey, which is sitting on the bed.

"I'm so damn proud of you, Callie." I'm still smiling. "It must've hurt like hell to do this, but you did it anyway."

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