Million Love Songs

Hurrah, more flirting! ‘As soon as you’re free.’

There’s a heavy breath from the other end of the phone. ‘That might prove to be the tricky thing. Finding a night when I’m free and you’re free and the kids are out may not be that easy.’

‘But we can do it if we want to,’ I point out. ‘Some things are worth waiting for.’

‘I’ll call you,’ Joe says. ‘I promise.’

‘I’ll look forward to it.’ I hang up with a smile on my face and in my heart. I breeze through service, chatting to all the customers – even the regulars who I don’t like that much. From the other side of the room, Mason watches me through narrowed eyes and they still stay narrowed even when I blow him a kiss.





Chapter Fifty-One





Charlie is still unwell when I swing by her place after work. She is pale, clammy and hasn’t moved far from her bed all weekend. I feel awful for her.

Though if you have to be ill in bed, Charlie’s bed is the place to be. She has a white, wrought iron bed head threaded through with pink feathered fairy lights and a wispy curtain that hangs down from the ceiling on either side also threaded with white lights. The duvet is pink and white patchwork and she has enough cushions to be able to sell some to Next. She’s listening to Take That on her iPod.

I smooth the hair from her face and ask, ‘Can I get you something? Could you manage a bit of toast? Or some tea?’

‘Yes,’ she says. ‘That sounds good. I’m actually feeling a bit hungry. The first time since Friday.’ She puts her laptop to one side. ‘I’m on the GB Army forum. Keeping up with my boy.’

‘Is that making you feel better?’

She nods. ‘You’re never alone when you’re with Gary.’ She has the very same cardboard cut-out as I do in the very same corner of her bedroom. We both give him a smile. ‘Paul’s on there too,’ she adds more coyly.

Oh, yes? ‘That’s cool.’

‘He’s called me a couple of times as well. Just to make sure that I’m OK.’

I’m liking the sound of that. See, definitely Nice.

‘So what did I miss at work?’ she asks with a yawn.

Confession time. I prepare myself for a dressing down when I say, ‘I phoned in sick on Saturday so that I could go out with Joe.’

Charlie tuts at me.

‘I know, but I so wanted to go. Don’t tell Mason, promise me.’

‘As if I’m likely to.’

‘He covered both of your shifts.’

She laughs at that. ‘Seriously? It won’t hurt him to get his hands dirty. About time that lazy sod did some work and appreciated what his minions do to keep his business afloat.’

I know we’re supposed to be on the same side, but I hate it when Charlie disses Mason. He’s not as bad as she makes out. Really, he’s not.

‘So what was the date like? Worth lying through your teeth for?’

‘Great.’ I’m in grave danger of going all dreamy even though I’m a woman approaching a certain age. ‘He’s fun and I really like him. It all ended a bit prematurely when his daughter was rushed to A&E with a suspected fracture.’

‘Yikes.’

‘She was OK. Just a sprain in the end, but he spent the rest of the night at the hospital instead of in my warm, cosy bed.’

‘You’ll always come behind the kids in the queue,’ she says. ‘You know that.’

‘Yes. It’s how it should be.’

She makes a harrumphing noise.

‘I think he’s worth it, Charlie. When you get to our age whoever you hook up with comes with history of some sort. That’s something we have to learn to accept. On both sides. Otherwise we will both end up with no one but cardboard cut-out Gary Barlow for company.’ I get up from her bed. ‘I’ll go and make some toast.’

‘There’s bread in the freezer, if the loaf in the bread bin is manky. You’re going to stay around for a bit?’

‘Of course, I will. We can binge-watch some Take That DVDs if you fancy it. Budge yourself up and make room for me on the bed.’

‘I don’t think I’m infectious now.’

As I head for the door, I say, ‘Remember, that’s never a great opening line for a date.’ Then I duck as Charlie throws one of her multitude of cushions at me.





Chapter Fifty-Two





I’m just going to skip the next few weeks because if I tell you about all the long, late-night and a little bit lovey-dovey FaceTime calls with Joe, you might just want to puke. We slowly, steadily get to know each other via the media of technology. But this is modern dating and we have to embrace it. In my mother’s day you had a few dates with the boy next door or one from your class at school and then you married them. There was none of this hooking up with strangers who you happened to like the look of from their profile picture only to find out that they were, at best, socially inept or at worst, a latent serial killer. At least I have met Joe in person and, if we have to work round the constraints of his family, then I’m prepared to do that. It’s infinitely preferable to throwing myself on the mercy of Match.com or eHarmony. No?

We have also managed a few real dates in that time. We snatched breakfast one morning after the school run and before we both had to start our shifts. That’s quite civilised, I think you’ll agree. We tried one more scuba-diving lesson with Joe as my instructor again, but our hands were straying to places that they shouldn’t at the bottom of the swimming pool and my mind wasn’t fully on my demand valve. Good job Bob didn’t try that or I’d have blocked his snorkel. Not a euphemism.

Joe and I haven’t had an opportunity to take our relationship onto a more … ahem … physical plane simply due to the fact that I can’t go to Joe’s house as he doesn’t yet want me to be ‘formally’ introduced to the kids and he can’t stay at my place as he has to be at home for the kids. Yet that’s no bad thing is it? Is it better to wait and enjoy the slow build-up to consummation or to hop into bed with someone you’ve met at a night club – someone who you don’t know a thing about and who couldn’t care less whether you have a good time or not? That said, I wouldn’t be adverse to it happening sooner rather than later. My nipples are permanently on red alert.

Anyway, that’s why you find me today on another outing with the good folk of the Costa del Keynes dive club. We’re out in force today as about a dozen members have come along. I’m still not safe enough to be let out in open water myself and, to be honest, I’m not in the slightest bit bothered. I’m not proving to be a natural diver. I’m not all that keen on getting wet or going into water where I don’t know what else might be in there. A bit of a drawback for a diver, I think you’ll agree. I maybe should have gone for photography instead or taken a course in Thai Massage.

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