‘Looks can be deceiving,’ I say, voice a hoarse whisper once more.
‘Hmm,’ he agrees. I know I’m not sick and he knows I’m not sick. ‘Shall I call in on the way home? Make sure you’re still alive.’
‘No, no. No need. Early night,’ I tell him. ‘In bed by nine.’
‘Lucky you,’ Mason says. ‘Think of me dealing with the hungry hordes in your stead.’
‘Thanks, Mason. I owe you one.’
‘You do,’ he says. ‘I’ll be considering ways in which you can redeem yourself.’
‘Better go.’ I put my hand to my mouth and do a bit of a bleurgh.
‘I’ll see you, Ruby.’
I close the door and stand with my back to it, sweating. I hear the slam of Mason’s car door and then watch him as he drives away. It was so kind of him to come. If I’d truly been ill, I would have been touched by his thoughtfulness. I hadn’t expected that in the slightest and, when he shows his softer side, I can’t help but like him. It’s easy to convince myself he’s an arrogant, self-centred twat. Then he does something like this. Nevertheless, I’m still hoping he doesn’t feel the need to check up on me later or I’m in deep trouble.
Chapter Forty-Eight
Joe picks me up at seven. I’m quite nervous going out to his car in case Mason is hiding in the bushes waiting to catch me out. This date could very well get me the sack.
It might be worth it though as I’ve never seen Joe looking more handsome. He’s obviously freshly showered and shaved. His dark curls are still slightly damp and his face is flushed with warmth. We look quite the dandy pair with him in a white shirt and faded jeans and me in my new Primarni frock in pastel shades.
‘You look lovely,’ he says and I’m glad that I bought it. A tenner well spent.
We go for pizza at a small restaurant out of town rather than a busy chain. I’ve not been here before and the atmosphere is great, but we can still hear each other speak rather than having to shout over the noise. It’s also quite useful to be away from the centre of Costa del Keynes where someone from work might spot me. This is how subterfuge makes you think. It must be exhausting to have an affair.
Once I relax and stop feeling guilty that I’m not actually ill and am out on a date, Joe and I have a great evening and laugh a lot. He’s easy company to be with and not too shabby to look at either.
He talks a lot about Daisy and Tom, showing me photographs on his phone. He’s obviously a proud dad and why not? It makes me sad to think that this little family have broken up and I wonder what pressures they’ve been under to have brought them to this point. I’d ask, but I don’t want to spend the whole of our evening talking about his ex or bringing him down with talk of his divorce. So we skip over the surface of it and move onto films, music and life in general. He doesn’t drink as he’s driving and I limit myself to a couple of glasses of wine, even though my nerves think they would like a lot more.
It’s eleven o’clock when he looks at his watch and says, ‘Wow, is that the time? The evening has flown by.’
I’m hoping this is a good sign as I really do like Joe. He’s wholesome, considerate and obviously a caring person.
‘I can’t think last when I was out this late on my own,’ he laughs. ‘I thought it would get easier when the kids were more grown-up, but the demands seem even more. They’re both high on hormones and most of my life is spent ferrying them about to parties and sleepovers. Their social life is ten times better than mine.’
‘It seems to be the way of the world now.’
‘I know I talk about them a lot,’ he says. ‘I’m sorry if I’ve bored you, but they’re my life. Everything I do, I do for them.’
‘I understand.’
‘That makes it harder for me to come to terms with what Gina has done. She puts herself ahead of everyone else.’ It’s the first time he’s mentioned her all evening and, as I suspected, his mood changes when he does. ‘I thought she’d find an excuse to back out of this weekend, but so far, so good. The kids were really excited to be going there. She lives in a big, posh house now and kids’ heads are easily turned.’
‘It will come right, I’m sure. All you have to do is persevere. Soon they’ll be off enjoying their own lives, maybe at university or travelling. The pain of this time will recede.’
‘Wise words,’ he says. ‘When you’re in the midst of it, sometimes it’s hard to retain your perspective.’ Then he laughs. ‘Before I get too maudlin, I’ll pay the bill.’
‘Let me split it with you.’
‘Wouldn’t dream of it,’ he says.
‘My treat next time.’
He fixes me with a warm gaze. ‘I like the sound of that.’
‘Me too.’
‘I have to take this slowly,’ he says. ‘I’d like us to see each other again, but I have to think of the kids. They’ve been through too much for me to cause any more disruption. I don’t want someone coming into their lives only to crash out a few months later. I have to be sure.’ It seems as if he’s been thinking about this a lot. ‘It’s not an excuse. I really do want to see you, but can we agree to take it one step at a time?’
‘That suits me fine.’ That’s clearly the sensible thing to do. And we are both very sensible grown-ups.
Then he drives me home and we park outside the granny annexe. We sit awkwardly in the car together, turning towards each other.
‘Thanks for a great evening, Ruby.’ Joe leans over and kisses me softly. ‘I’m out of practice with all this.’
‘It seemed all right to me,’ I admit, head spinning.
‘I’d better be off then.’
We both linger and then kiss some more. It feels so right to be in his arms.
My mouth goes dry when I say, ‘You said the kids were away tonight?’
‘Yeah.’ Our eyes meet and, hesitantly, he says, ‘I could stay for longer.’
I try to sound nonchalant. ‘If you don’t have to rush back for the kids.’
‘This isn’t really taking it slowly, is it?’
We both laugh at that. ‘No, it’s not,’ I agree. ‘But maybe we have to seize the moment.’
This time, without pausing, he blurts out, ‘OK.’
So, with an indecent amount of haste, we get out of the car and climb up my stairs together.
Chapter Forty-Nine
We’re kissing again before I even open the door. In the living room, I make no pretence of offering coffee and we fall on each other hungrily, his mouth on mine, his hands exploring my body. We fall onto the sofa together and continue our fevered exploration. I fumble with the buttons of his shirt and he struggles with the zip of my best Primarni. We are half-naked, rumpled and revved-up when his phone rings. He looks at it with indecision and I want to say ‘don’t answer it’, but I know that it might be one of the kids and he can’t ignore that.
‘Sorry,’ he says. ‘Really sorry.’ He holds up a finger as he grabs his phone. ‘Don’t move a muscle.’
But I do. I rearrange my clothing so that it’s slightly more decorous.