She nodded, finally looking at me.
"Once when I was younger, I found a baby owl on the edge of our property. I was angry with my mother and I'd run outside and had lain on the ground under a fir tree. I was crying, and suddenly I heard this tiny sound like something very small hitting the ground next to me. I looked over and there was this helpless baby bird that had just fallen out of his nest, thankfully onto a bed of pine needles and leaves. He was so fuzzy and so tiny. I picked him up and tried to see the nest he'd fallen from, but it must have been so high up, and so hidden, I couldn't spot it. I didn't have a way to climb the fir tree, so I took him home with me."
"Home . . ." I murmured. "Is it close by?"
She smiled. "Not far." We began walking. "Anyway, I didn't think he'd live. But he did. He lived and he got strong, and eventually I released him back to the forest. I guess I kind of imagined this owl might be the same one."
I smiled. "Maybe it was. Maybe he recognized you. Why were you mad at your mother?"
"Hmm?"
"You said you ran outside because you were angry with your mother."
"Oh." She furrowed her brow. "I wanted to go to a party, and she wouldn't let me. Just a silly party . . ." She smiled, looking at me sideways, her smile fading. She looked down at her feet as she stepped over a fallen branch, biting her lip, obviously considering something. Finally, she asked, "What are you doing out here, Holden?"
I sighed. "I was trying to find you."
She stopped, looking straight at me. "Why?"
"Because I wanted to make sure you understood about the other night . . . that you were okay . . ."
"Oh," she said, biting her lip. "I see."
"Lily," I said, grabbing both her hands in mine. "I'm so sorry about that. I swear to you I had no idea Taylor was coming to visit. If I had, I would have told her not to come. I got rid of her. She's gone."
"Why? Not because of me. Because—"
"No, not because of you. Not entirely. I would have told her not to come because I'm not interested in spending time with her. But I do want to spend time with you. I meant what I said."
Lily licked her lips, her eyes on the ground as if she was thinking. "You were naked, and she was . . ."
I grimaced. "I know. God, I'm so sorry. It wasn't what it looked like. She surprised me, and I wasn't at my best." Jesus, the understatement of the century. "I didn't know she was coming. Please trust me. Please give me a second chance. I've spent the last three days wandering through the woods looking for you. I'll make the three-hour walk out here every day if I have to. Or to your house if you'll let me. I'll come to you, so you don't have to walk all the way to me, especially now that I know how far it is. I'll do anything you ask me to do. Just please don't tell me you don't want to see me anymore."
She let out a big breath, pulling her hands from mine. "It's just not a good idea, Holden. I thought—"
"That can't be true. It can't be wrong to want to spend time together. I know there are things I'm . . . dealing with, and I know you don't trust me enough to share your life with me yet. And I know the whole Taylor thing hardly helped that." I rubbed the back of my neck. "But I'm hoping you will. I'm hoping you'll let me earn that. Please don't tell me to go." I put my hands in my pockets, swallowing, feeling intensely vulnerable in front of her. Why would she want you? Why would she give you a second chance? Why?
"Oh, Holden . . ." She looked away for a minute, and I held my breath. After a tense minute, she sighed and gave the smallest nod of her head, practically imperceptible. My heart soared.
"Was that a yes?"
Her lip quirked up. "A half yes."
"What should I do to earn a full yes?" I bent slightly to look up into her lowered eyes, her dark lashes fanning across her cheeks.
Her lip quirked a bit higher, and her eyes met mine. "I'll let you know when I think of something." I couldn't help smiling, couldn't help marveling that she had given me another chance. A half chance. And I'd take it. I'd take whatever she would give me.
"How'd you find me out here anyway?" she asked after a moment.
"Truthfully, I didn't know you'd be here. I just hoped. I came to check out Whittington."
Lily looked over her shoulder at the abandoned hospital. Turning back to me, she said, "Creepy, isn't it? Terrible things happened there."
"I know. I read about it online."