“I am cool with it. But she’s cheating on you, Sana. We saw her. You deserve to be with someone who knows they want to be with you. And Caleb’s so nice—you even said. You’d be such a great couple. I bet he wouldn’t cheat on you. And I’ve seen you flirting with him in trig, and you’re so cute together.”
“I don’t recall ever saying he was nice. And I definitely haven’t been flirting with him.”
At this, Hanh snorts and Reggie lets out a loud “ha!”
“What? I haven’t!” Have I?
“Whatever. But you do think he’s nice, right?”
“Well, yeah, but—”
“Come on. He’s totally asking you out right now. Just go out with him. Just once. What do you have to lose?”
“Uh, Jamie?”
Elaine heaves a melodramatic sigh. “If it turns out Jamie’s cheating on you, then. Then you’ll try. Because it’s not cheating if she’s cheating, too.” I’m not even sure she cares about Caleb or me or gay or straight anymore—she just wants to win. She’s not a tiny, adorable little kitten, like Reggie says. She’s a tiny, adorable little pit bull and she’s clearly not going to let go until I give in.
“Fine. If it turns out Jamie’s cheating, which she’s not—and Caleb tries to kiss me, which he won’t—I will try it. Jeez. Are you happy?” Everyone cheers wildly, and Elaine actually throws her arms around me.
“You’re going to love it!” she says, squeezing me tight.
Elaine’s campaign to get me to go straight is more funny than annoying when I tell Jamie about it. I’ve told Jamie that Caleb invited me to go bowling with him and his friends on Friday, and that Elaine wants me to kiss him. It’s kind of nice to have him in the background, actually, because it turns out that Jamie’s going to dinner with Kelsey and her parents on Friday, too. Though it’s not like I’m worried about Kelsey. Or that Jamie might end up falling for her again. Not at all.
The thing is, since Jamie and I cleared the air about Kelsey, our afternoons together have been even better than before. It’s such a relief to have everything out in the open between us. I feel like we’ve cleared a hurdle—we had a hard talk, and we got through it, and we’re stronger for it. Also, there’s nothing more thrilling than hearing your girlfriend say that you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to her. And maybe just a teeny, tiny bit because, in an effort to make Jamie forget whatever intensity she had with Kelsey this summer, well . . . let’s just say I know a lot more about Jamie’s body than Elaine knows about Jimmy’s, unless she’s holding out on us. But Elaine has apparently never had an experience that she didn’t want to share, so I’m pretty confident on that point. Just a few months ago, I would have been shocked at myself. Now, I’m just happy and excited.
The only glitch is the Dad problem. The more I look at that silver-wrapped box, the angrier I get. He’s uprooted Mom and me, and turned both our lives upside down for That Woman. And now he’s got the nerve to give her pearls? The pearl earrings were supposed to be our thing. They were a reminder of the story of Yama-sachi and Toyo-tama-himé—Dad’s promise to me that I was his treasure no matter what, his reassurance that he saw what was precious and powerful in me. Not only does he not love Mom anymore, it feels like he doesn’t love me anymore, either.
I’m mad at Mom, too, for letting him do this to us. She has to know—how could she not? I’m sure she’d tell me, “Gaman.” She’d say, “Divorce is selfish.” But if you ask me, it’s Dad who’s being selfish, and her having gaman isn’t being strong. It’s just something she’s telling herself so that she feels better about hanging on to a sham of a marriage because she’s too weak and embarrassed to stand up for herself and make him stop.
Jamie keeps telling me to just tell Mom straight out, even if she doesn’t want to hear it: “That way they can at least talk about it. Like we talked, you know?”
The difference, of course, being that Dad was cheating and Jamie wasn’t. And that Dad could end up leaving, but Jamie won’t.
Of course she won’t.
28
KELSEY AND HER PARENTS ARE PICKING JAMIE UP directly after practice to take her out to dinner and back home, so Jamie’s changed into an outfit that seems a little too cute for meeting someone’s dad so he can write a letter of rec, and she’s taking a little more time with her makeup than I think she needs to. She seems a little more nervous than I think is appropriate, too, but she says she needs to make a good impression on Mr. Bowman.
Normally I’d walk right home, but today I end up hanging out with the kids who are waiting for their parents or their buses. I’m not gonna lie—I’m dying to see what Kelsey looks like. While I wait, I indulge in a little daydream where Jamie pulls me out of the crowd and introduces me to the Bowmans as her girlfriend. Of course, that would also mean coming out to the cross-country team, so I don’t really want that to happen. But it sure would be nice to watch Kelsey go skulking home, defeated. Or at least skulking defeatedly off to dinner with Jamie and her parents.
When a black BMW sedan pulls into the parking lot at five thirty, the only person in it is Kelsey. She parks the car, gets out, and struts over in all her tall, hot glory. She looks like an Abercrombie & Fitch model. She’s wearing super-skinny jeans, and a mostly sheer off-the-shoulder white peasant blouse that would give Mom a heart attack. And is her hair salon-highlighted, or is it just naturally a rich auburn with reddish-gold streaks? And then there’s her delicate fairy princess nose, pool-blue eyes, rose petal lips (though that could be her lip gloss), and a complexion that could only be described as sun-kissed. The works. I mean, seriously. Come on.
She surveys us and flashes a dazzling smile, and I feel dark and frumpy with my short, Hobbity legs, my non-see-through top, and boring black ponytail. “Hi! I’m looking for Jamie Ramirez.”
Janet points toward the girls’ locker room door. It seems I’m not the only one who’s lost the power of speech.
“Okay,” says Kelsey, tossing her disgusting salon-perfect, auburn-golden locks and pulling out her phone. “I’ll just wait here for her.”
“Dude, is that the new iPhone?” asks Arjun.
“It is.” She smiles at him.
“Can I see?”
“Sure.”
In a flash, Arjun—and three other guys—are at Kelsey’s side, huddled over the phone and grilling her about its cool new features. And clearly flirting with her. “Give it up!” I want to shout at them. “She’s a lesbian!”
Janet elbows me and I’m about to whisper a mean-spirited comment about Kelsey’s fancy car and her perfect hair, but at that moment, Jamie bursts through the locker room doors.
“Hey, sweetie! Omigod you are on fleek!” Kelsey abandons the boys, wraps Jamie in a hug, and steps back to admire her outfit, which also includes a peasant blouse, just not sheer and white. I look sideways at Janet and I’m gratified to see her looking back at me.
“Hey, you too. Nice shirt.”