Maya didn’t know her next step, but she knew she couldn’t think of what it was when she wasn’t feeling like herself. Only she wasn’t sure she knew what that felt like anymore, or if she’d ever be able to feel it again.
The knock on her car window forced a scream from her throat, and she turned to see the one person in the world she’d never thought to see again, yet the very woman who might be able to help because there weren’t any expectations.
Maya opened the car door and let out a breath. “Holly.”
Holly gripped Maya’s hands, her warmth soothing the ice that was Maya. “What the hell did that dumbass do?”
The cursing coming from Holly’s mouth was so out of character that Maya couldn’t help but laugh, even as tears slid down her cheeks.
“He didn’t do anything,” Maya finally said.
“Bullshit.”
Maya snorted again. In any other situation, she would have given it to Holly for making her snort like that, but she didn’t have it in her. “No, really, he didn’t do a damn thing. Neither did Border.” She met Holly’s gaze, not knowing why she was about to say more but knowing she needed to. “I told them I was pregnant, and they didn’t say a damn thing.”
Holly’s eyes widened, and Maya wanted to curse herself.
Way to go, tell Jake’s ex you’re pregnant so soon after they broke up. That’s not uncomfortable or anything.
“And he didn’t say a thing?” Holly asked. She shook her head, disgust on her face. “Men,” she said with a snort. “They’re idiots.”
Maya sniffed and wiped her face. Damn it, why wasn’t she like Meghan, who always had tissues in her car and purse. Of course, Meghan had two kids and another on the way, so it made sense. Maya stiffened. Hell, she’d soon have to be the one with tissues in her purse and baby wipes and all of those mom things that always confused her.
She was going to be a mother.
“I’m going to be sick,” she mumbled and scrambled out of the car. She knelt on the small patch of grass that lined the parking lot and emptied the rest of her stomach. As she heaved, Holly held back her hair and murmured soothing words.
No matter how many times she might have thought of this situation, not once had she imagined it would be Jake’s ex holding her hair. Other than the tiny reaction to hearing that Jake might be a father, Holly had been soothing and angry for Maya rather than at her. There was something special about this woman, yet right then, Maya could only think of herself. Call her selfish, but being accidentally pregnant by one of her lovers, who apparently didn’t love her, seemed to warrant it.
“Here, drink this,” Holly said. Maya turned and took the uncapped bottle of water from the other woman and took a tentative sip before gulping more.
“Thank you. I drank a lot of fluids today so I could take like eleven or so tests, but I’m apparently still thirsty.”
Holly’s brows rose. “Eleven?”
“It might have been seven.” Maya sank down fully and let out a breath. “I don’t really remember after the first five or so.” She winced. “I kind of panicked.”
Holly sighed and sat down next to Maya, her prim and very clean clothes probably getting who knew what on them. “You just found out you’re pregnant, and I’m pretty sure you weren’t planning on it, so I think you’re allowed to panic.”
Maya blew out a breath. “But I think I panicked a little more than I should have.” She tapped her tongue right against her lip and tried to catch her thoughts. Tears slid down her cheeks but she ignored them. She was always crying these days.
“You’re crying, Maya. And you’re alone right now and talking to me even though I know I’m not your favorite person. Talk to me, honey. Tell me what you’re thinking.” Holly put her hand on Maya’s knee, and Maya blinked.
“Why would you think you’re not my favorite person?” Maya wasn’t sure who made that list at that moment since she was currently on an emotional spiral.
Holly rolled her eyes. “I knew you loved him, Maya.” She winced. “Not that I was with him because you loved him. But I knew. And I tried to ignore it because I thought I was wrong, or maybe I wanted to think I was wrong. And I thought Jake wanted to be with me, and we’d all find a way to make things work together. Only things never work out the way they should, and as soon as I figured out that Jake was in love with you, too? I broke it off. Not only did I not want to stand between the two of you, but I also know myself better than that. I couldn’t allow myself to get caught in the middle and end up hurt in the process.”
Maya stared at the other woman in shock. “You knew?”
Holly gave her a sad smile. “Of course, I knew, Maya. And I feel like a butt for being with him for as long as I was when you were in love with him. I…I didn’t know it went both ways until it was almost too late.”
Holly’s words processed in Maya’s mind, and she shook her head. “No, he doesn’t love me, Holly. Not like that. He’s never once told me that.”
Holly raised a brow. “And did you tell him you loved him?”