“Come on then. I won’t push you anymore about us for right now, but I won’t give up, so you’ll have to deal with it eventually. I want you. What I will push you on, Jade, is that you talk to someone about what happened out there. I can’t help you with that. You may be pissed off, but I’m recommending that you do. Now let’s go get this over with so I can take you home.” He pushes himself off from the Jeep and extends his hand out to me to guide me up and in. All I can think about as I watch him walk around the front, climb in, stick the keys in the ignition, and crank his so-called baby on, is going home.
Our drive is relatively quiet. The raspy voice of Jimi Hendrix lulls me to relax in the seat. Although my brain won’t shut up, the dread of telling my superior what he already knows has my head throbbing worse than it did. Kaleb is right. I need to talk to someone. A neutral person. I may be screwed up over what I’ve done. However, I’m not oblivious to the fact I could use some help. I know good and well it will be recommended to me. I sigh heavily. I want nothing more than to be myself. God, after this mission and the things I’ve done, I don’t even know who I am anymore.
By the time we pull up to the gate and show our identity badges to the officer, I’m a mess.
“Can I drive you home?” Kaleb asks after he parks.
“I’m too tired to make the drive to Jacksonville tonight. I thought I would get a hotel.” It’s the truth. I’m starving, and as much as I would love to sleep in my own bed, the thought of driving tonight doesn’t appeal to me; besides, he needs his rest as much as I do.
“Jade. I have a place fifteen minutes from here. Like hell you’re staying at a hotel. Wait for me here if you’re done before me.” His eyes smolder over with intensity, and I feel a twinge inside. Jesus. I’m doomed. There goes my rebellious body again, thinking for me and defying every rule I’ve made for him.
“Okay.” My response feels so awkward. This entire situation feels that way. The freedom to say what we want, to even have a civil conversation, is strange. I really don’t want to stay at his place. It feels too personal. Too extreme. Hell, maybe I should request treatment in the hospital, or say goodbye now. I should just walk away, but I can’t. Instead, I follow him inside, where he goes one way and I go another.
“I’m going to request you see one of our doctors, Jade.” I knew this was coming. I’m okay with it. I know I need it. Maybe it will help me cope with what I’ve done.
“I agree, Sir. I’ll make an appointment right away.” Reaching across his dark wooden table, I retrieve the card from his outstretched hand.
“You did well out there. Now go. Make sure you call the first chance you get. I’m not clearing you for active duty until I receive a report back from the psychiatrist.” He stands and straightens out his uniform before walking with purpose to the side of his desk.
“I sure will.” I rise and salute him. He shakes his head, leaving me somewhat dumbfounded.
“It’s me who should salute you. I’m proud of you, Captain.” His shiny shoes click together. I suppress my joy from being saluted by a General in the United States Army. I spin on my feet and exit the door with the first honest to god genuine smile on my face since I left this country.
“You ready?” Kaleb is standing against the brick wall, tapping away on his phone when I walk out into the warm early evening air.
“Yes. Starving too.” Feeling somewhat energized after my briefing, I decide to make the best of my time with Kaleb.
“Good. I ordered a pizza. You okay?” My breath catches in my throat when he shoves off of the wall and places one of his strong, sturdy arms around my shoulder before he starts to steer us toward his Jeep. He’s powerful in the way he walks and in the way he moves. I’ve already admitted I was scared, of what, I’m not sure. Him. Me. Or hell, it could be both.
~~~~
“Holy shit. This is you? It’s beautiful, Kaleb.” I point to the cream-colored stucco home in front of me. It sits in a fancy private estate called Lowell Estates.
“Yup. Home, baby.” Oh hell, his dangerous smile glistens as his eyes rake up and down my body when he opens the door, those devious baby blues never leaving my face. Not even when he reaches behind us and pulls out our bags. Not even when he walks in front of and around his Jeep. Or when he opens the door to help me out. The only time he takes them off of me is when he slides his key into the lock, swings the door open, and drops the bags on the floor to take the pizza from my trembling hand.
I have no time to think. No time to breathe before he gently guides me back with one hand placed in the center of my chest. My heart is thumping away with so much desire, or it could be nerves, or hell maybe even anticipation? I feel him kick the door closed with his booted foot before he gracefully lifts me in his arms. “Kaleb, what are you doing?” He needs to put me down. His strides are determined. “I’m taking you where I’ve wanted you since the first time I saw you. To my bed.”