Amie
Lex leaves the bedroom first, which gives me a few minutes to collect myself before I go back to the party. I’m nervous about how to deal with Ruby. I’m grateful she won’t be able to get me alone before Lex and I can figure out how we’re going to deal with this.
I don’t even know what the hell is going on right now. Despite my actions he still seems invested and I’m unsure what to do with that.
Especially now that I have to deal with him on a regular basis again. I wish it was just about the sex. It would be so much easier if it was limited to physical attraction. As much as it seems that he was designed by my own personal orgasm team to provide the best, most amazing releases in the entire world, it’s far more complex than that. Or at least that’s how it feels.
I take a deep breath and prepare to manage being near Lex and acting normal.
When I return to the party everyone is seated in the living room, drinking coffee and eating petit fours. I might be on the other side of the room, but I can feel Lex’s proximity, and it’s making me anxious for the conversation I know is coming.
Beyond getting into bed with him, what I really want right now is to curl up beside him and have him tell me stories about his childhood like he did in Bora Bora. I want to listen to him talk about Mimi, to hear the reverence in his voice. More than that I want that reverence directed at me. And that scares me, because I don’t know if that desire is real or a projection of another idealized version of him that I created in Bora Bora.
“Everything okay?” Ruby asks as I take the seat beside her. “You were gone awhile.” She glances in Lex’s direction and he quickly refocuses his attention away from me, to his father.
“Everything’s fine. Just messages from Pierce about some legal stuff.”
“Armstrong stuff?”
I nod. It’s not an out and out lie. Pierce did send me a bunch of messages today about the language in the pre-nup. I’m not sure if it means anything yet, but he’s still digging.
Mimi drops into the armchair across from us. “Amie, you’re so good at organizing events, do you think you’d have some time available to help plan the menu for the engagement party?”
“Oh! That’s a great idea!” Ruby says enthusiastically. “Where should we hold it?”
“What about the Concord?” I glance in Lex’s direction, surprised by his participation in the conversation.
“In the Inception ballroom! Where we held the Halloween soirée!” Mimi claps her hands excitedly. “Lex, you’re there later this week, aren’t you? With Bane, yes?”
“I’ll be between the Concord and the Mills Hotel next week,” Bane replies. “With Griffin out of the country, I’m juggling both hotels.”
“Hopefully he won’t miss the engagement party.” Mimi seems worried about that. “He mentioned Lincoln is out there, too.”
“Our cousin Lincoln?” Bane asks.
The mention of Armstrong’s older brother is jarring. I’ve never met him, but, from what I’ve been told, he’s not particularly involved with his family. It’s not hard to understand why.
“Mmm. Funny how Griffin is on the other side of the world and runs into him,” Mimi replies.
“I haven’t seen Lincoln in ages,” Bane says.
“Well, he avoids his family as much as possible, doesn’t he?” Mimi replies, lips pursed in what might be disapproval.
“Can you blame him? Anyway, I’m at the Concord all week.” Lex drums his long, capable fingers on the arm of his chair. It’s something he does when he’s anxious, or thinking about something that bothers him. He foot taps the floor twice before stilling. I glance up and his eyes dart away from me and focus back on Mimi. “How can I help?”
“Why don’t you arrange a dinner with catering so we can set the menu for the party, Lex? Amie, would you be available for something like that? You and Ruby did such an amazing job with the Halloween party in the fall and this kind of planning isn’t really Bancroft’s strong suit.”
“Of course, anything I can do.” At least I can attribute the excitement to the party planning, even though in my head I’m planning ways to be alone with him.
It’s after eleven by the time we’ve finished preliminary engagement party planning. Mimi offers to have a car take me home when Lex holds up a hand. “I’m heading home, too. I can have you dropped off.”
“Are you sure it isn’t out of the way?” I feel the waver in my smile. God, I hope we’re not obvious right now.
The tapping on the arm of his chair continues. “It’s really no trouble.”
“If you’re sure.” The last time I got into a vehicle with Lex things got out of hand. Regardless of the chemistry between us, this is about more than that. I’m sure I’ll be better able to restrain myself since the plan is to have an actual conversation with real words.
I gather my things and say goodbye to Ruby, while Bane and Lex have a brief, whispered conversation. I thank Mimi and Harrison for the lovely dinner, and follow Lex down the sprawling front steps to the waiting car.
I slide across the leather bench all the way to the far side and buckle myself in. Restraints are good. Necessary even. And not the kind I kept in my sex toy tickle trunk. This one will keep me on this side of the car, rather than straddling Lex’s lap. It’s instinctual I think, the desire to manage the emotional strain with physical release. It might even be a Pavlovian response to Lex at this point.
He lowers himself into the vehicle and the driver closes us inside together. I inhale a deep breath, hoping to remain calm in the face of my sudden panic, except it’s more like I’m huffing the scent of him. I immediately feel drunk, and it has nothing to do with the wine I consumed tonight and everything to do with the man beside me. Now that there’s nothing preventing us from having a frank discussion about what the hell we’re doing, or not doing, my heart seems to have taken up sprinting.
Lex is sitting on the far side of the seat, two feet of soft leather separating our bodies. Two feet that feels simultaneously too far and too close. He slouches, posture relaxed, legs spread wide. Like I’d like mine to be, with him in between them.
I need to focus, but my lady parts are lubing up in anticipation. It would be wonderful if my brain and my body could stop working against each other.
He stretches his arm across the back of the seat but he’s about three inches shy of making contact. “What’s your address, Amie?”
I’m so focused on how close he is to touching me that I miss the question. “I’m sorry?”
“Your address, you need to give it to the driver, unless you’re planning to come home with me.” And there it is, that cocky grin.
“It might be better than my place.”
He cocks his head. “Do you intend to stay the night?”
“I-I don’t know.” I’m biting the end of my nail. “Do you want me to?”