Heart of the Hunter

I KNEW THIS WAS A bad idea. I was barely prepared for Hunter, and I didn’t think for a minute that anyone else would be even close to ready. I wasn’t worried so much about Lucas, in fact, I was actually looking forward to he and Hunter meeting. Luke hadn’t had a man in his life since our father died, with the exception of Phil, and that wasn’t really someone I considered a role model. For all of Hunter’s demons and sins, there was an honest man beneath, a man with integrity and power, a man, plain and simple. If he could be who I thought he was, who I knew deep down he was, Lucas could use him in his life. Maybe the other way around too.

Grace was the one I was worried about. I loved her with all my heart and no one, with the exception of my parents, had looked out for me the way she had. But she was an old fashioned, small town, woman. She didn’t like anything disrupting her quiet life and did not trust anyone who did that. What scared me most was that I was on a path to becoming exactly like her. While there was absolutely nothing wrong with that, it’s not who I was anymore. She would take some convincing and I was beginning to wonder if this morning would be the right time to do it.

As Hunter edged the car into the driveway and parked, we both looked at each other with the same hesitant eyes.

“Kelly, this is a bad fucking idea.”

“I know,” I said, as I turned my head back toward the house.

It was a bad idea. It was a horrible idea. But it was something that had to be done. Might as well just rip the band-aid off.

“Listen, you go on in, have some breakfast with the kid and Grace, and I’ll go check out this farm outside of town. I’ll come back in later and we can, shit, I don’t know, but you know I’ll come back tonight.”

I sat in the passenger seat and thought about what he was saying. Maybe it would be better. I could smell the whiskey off his breath and I was a mess. What would I say to Grace? How would I explain him being there when she woke up?

“Kelly, it’s not too late. We can change our minds. We don’t have to do this now.”

I looked over at him, his beautiful blue eyes, his chiseled arm reaching behind me and playing with my hair. I didn’t care anymore about what Grace thought. This dangerous man had chosen me and I wanted him. It was just the way it was and she would have to come to terms with it, just like I had.

“Yes, it is too late to change our minds, Hunter. This is something we’re going to do. Now.”

I reached into the glove compartment and pulled out a pack of gum, throwing it in his lap.

“There is no way this will help,” I chuckled, “but it will make me feel better.”

He stared at the gum and muttered to himself as he popped out three pieces and jammed them in his mouth.

“This is a bad fucking idea. A really fucking bad idea.”

We opened the car and made our way quietly up the steps and stood at the front door. There were no lights on and I couldn’t hear anyone moving around inside.

Thank God. No one was awake yet.

Hunter was opening the screen door, and went to turn the handle, when I grabbed his hand, stopping him.

“Kelly, what the fuck?” he whispered. “Am I coming in or not?”

I paused and looked at him.

“Yes, you are. But I’m not going to have her knowing I’ve been out all night with you. I want this to go smoothly and if I come in with you and your boozy breath she’s never going to go for this.”

He stared down at me and I could see his eyes getting wide with anger.

“Kelly, goddamn it, listen to me. I’m not fucking fourteen years old, and I’m not going to sneak into this house just to try and keep some lady from freaking the fuck out. This is bullshit and you know it. Either I’m coming in or I’m not. You know what? Fuck this. I’m not.”

He turned on his heels and started to make his way down the stairs.

“Hunter, wait,” I whispered forcefully, watching him turn around and stare me down from the bottom of the steps.

“I don’t give a flying fuck what she thinks of me or the whiskey on my breath,” he said, pointing at the window of the house. “I’ve got shit to do, Kelly, and you’re a part of that now, not that old bitty. I couldn’t give a shit what she thinks. Just you.”

I stood there and looked up at him. How would this ever work? Could it ever work? What did work even mean for us? I looked down at the ground and then back up into his eyes.

“I know, Hunter. Just come inside. Lucas will think you’re a superhero, and Grace, well, Grace will come around. She’s incredibly important to me and I’m even more important to her. When she sees how I look at you,” I stopped talking before I embarrassed myself.

Hunter sighed and spit out his gum, replacing it with another piece.

“Fuck it,” he said plainly. “What’s the point of drowning yourself in booze if you don’t do something fucking stupid to end the night?”

I looked up at him and smiled as he glared angrily at the door and shook his head.

“I don’t know what the fuck you’ve gotten me into, Kelly. But, shit, I guess it’s not half the mess I got you stuck in.”

He paused for a second and then pulled out a cigarette and spit out the fresh gum.

“All right, listen. You don’t have to lie to her. Go inside on your own. I’m going to stand out here and finish this fucking cigarette, then I’m going to knock on the door. You tell that woman.”

“Grace. Please call her, Grace,” I interrupted.

“I’ll call her whatever the fuck I want, all right?” he said coldly.

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