“Shit,” I said. “Grant, what am I supposed to do? I never even felt this nervous when I had to kill people.”
“Jackson. You’re really worked up.”
“Of course I am. Look at her. You ever seen a lady like that before in your life? She’s the love of my life, Grant. She gave me a son. I walked out on her twelve years ago and she doesn’t even know I’m back in town. You’d be shitting yourself too if you were in my position.”
Grant looked at her and raised an eyebrow. “You want me to go over? Break it to her gently that you’re back.”
I shook my head. I’d been waiting so long for this moment. I’d played it over in my mind a million times. The moment I revealed myself to Faith had to be special. It had to be perfect. After waiting so long, she deserved at least that much.
From behind my beer I glanced over at her—her light brown hair, her big, dark eyes like pools of water, her knockout body. She still had all the right curves in all the right places.
I got up from my seat.
“You’re going over already?” Grant said.
“I don’t have time to play games any more,” I said. And I wasn’t kidding. Just looking at her made my dick hard. I had to get her back. But first, I had to take a deep breath to calm myself. I looked down at my jeans to see if there was a bulge. There was. I was so hot for Faith I could hardly contain myself.
I downed my beer.
I couldn’t believe I hadn’t said anything to her when we were in her car that night. I’d been feeling strange. I’d been off my game. I’d given her the necklace. She must have put it together after that. I was glad. If she at least knew I was still alive, if she suspected I might be back in town, then it would be less of a shock to her now when I showed up out of nowhere.
The adrenaline started pumping through my veins. I focused on the task at hand. I’d always been good at focusing my will, building the confidence I needed to go through with a deed.
After all this time, I was going to reclaim what was mine. I was going to reclaim my woman and my child. She’d drop her panties for me again, bend over, take what I gave her, and beg for more. I knew I could win her back. This was my natural habitat, my hunting ground. She was in my territory now, and she wouldn’t escape. I’d show her that I’d been faithful to her. I’d show her I’d been true. I’d show her that I loved her.
I put ten bucks on the bar. “Have yourself a beer on me, buddy. I’ll be occupied for a while.”
Grant shook his head.
“You seem real cocky all of a sudden,” he said.
“You’ve got to be the man you choose to be,” I said.
What if Faith slapped me in the face? What if she burst out crying and ran out of the bar? I could take it. I could take whatever came. Like Grant had said, she deserved this much. If she was angry at me, that was fair enough. She had every right. But the very least I could do was pay her the courtesy of allowing her to be angry. Of allowing her to lash out.
“Sue,” I said, speaking to the waitress, “what’s the nicest wine you’ve got in this place?”
Lacey told me about the business she’d started with Faith and I knew she’d appreciate a good vintage.
Sue shook her head, as if to say don’t order the wine.
“Listen,” I said to her. “I’ve got some of ours in the back of the truck. Would you mind if I brought in a bottle?”
She shrugged. She didn’t care what I did. She was annoyed that another woman had caught my attention. I didn’t care if she was disappointed. I didn’t care about anything except Faith.
I slipped out to the truck through the back door of the bar and grabbed a bottle of the pinot noir Grant had been perfecting. It came from my father’s vineyard. Grant had worked it during my years of absence and he’d done a good job. He said he’d wanted to slash the vines at one point, because the grapes were bitter, but he’d decided to give them a second chance and was glad he did. It was a fine wine. Grant had a gift for developing subtle, complex flavors. In the glovebox was a pocket knife with a corkscrew on it. I grabbed that too.
When I got back into the bar, Faith was still sitting there with Lacey. Sue hadn’t gone near them, which I was thankful for. I approached decisively. This was one of the moments in my life I had to act with confidence or not at all.
“Have you ladies tried the second chance Pinot Noir from Socorro Valley?” I said.
Faith looked up at me and the blood drained from her face. The entire world froze. The music in the bar disappeared, all the sounds died. My vision narrowed and faded so that the only thing I could see was her face. My heart pounded in my chest.
She looked at me like she was seeing someone she’d thought had died a long time ago. Tears filled her eyes.