Hate To Love You

I tried to imagine from hers.

She knew Holly and Holly’s cousin. Holly knew guys. She was the one in the group who had a different crush every week. I couldn’t remember hearing Missy talking about guys or anyone else. It was always Holly or the cousin.

Those were the only two people I saw her with. Ever.

She looked at me. I felt compelled to apologize, but I didn’t. I’d been hurt by her in the beginning, and I didn’t keep quiet to hurt her personally.

“Oh, hey.” She tugged at her coat’s collar. “Some girl stopped by the room and asked about you.”

“What? Who?”

She shook her head. “I’ve never seen her in my life. I don’t know. She didn’t leave a name or number, or anything. I just thought I should mention it.”

A girl? Someone she didn’t know, too. Maybe it’d been Aby or Becca looking for me before they knew to find me at Shay’s house?

Maybe.

“What’d she look like?”

Another shrug from Missy. “Blonde hair. That’s all I remember.”

Becca had blonde hair.

Then I was distracted when Missy asked, “I suppose you’re going to some big parties tonight?”

I shrugged. “I haven’t talked about it.” I caught sight of Sarah and Laura. They were heading out in a different group of people. “They are, but I don’t know what we’re doing.”

“You and Shay . . .”

“Yeah . . .” I trailed off, too. This was becoming awkward. I cleared my throat. “Thank you for being nice to my mom and helping with my stuff.”

A smile cracked her rigid exterior. “Your mom is funny. She dressed up as a college student when she came to get your things. I think she missed a few decades. She had a Trapper Keeper with her.”

I groaned. “Of course, she would.”

I didn’t know what else to say after that. Missy must not have either because we both fell silent. She went back to kicking that rock around.

“I guess I’ll see you next semester?”

I nodded. “Looks like it.”

“I’ll see you then.”

She lifted a hand in a small wave, returning to her group, and it felt like a chapter closing. Kristina came over, rested an arm around my shoulders, and sighed. “How’d that go?”

“Was I wrong in not telling her about Gage and Shay?”

“No one should ever make you feel guilty for not opening up about yourself. You’ll want to open up to the right ones.”

That was true. “Thank you. I needed to hear that.”

“Come on.” She patted my arm. “Your man’s probably waiting by now.”

I sagged closer to her. I liked hearing those words.

My man.





Shay parked on the street outside his house. Every light on the main floor was on, as well as the lights in the basement, a few more on the second floor, and one from the third floor.

Shay grunted. “I do believe we’re having a party.” He looked at me. “What do you want to do?”

“What do you mean?”

“We can go somewhere else.”

I frowned.

Kristina and Casey asked about our evening plans, but I hadn’t known what we were doing. I knew now. Reaching over, I laced our fingers together, resting our hands on his leg. “I think I should call Kristina and Casey, and we should all go to the party.”

Surprise flitted over his features. “You sure? We can just hang out in the room, if you want?”

I shook my head. “No way. You were the MVP. That party is for you. I’m not going to be the girlfriend who pulls you away.”

“You sure?” He was grinning.

“Yes. I’ll be with my friends, and what are you smiling about?”

“Nothing.” He leaned over, his lips finding mine for a quick second. “It’s just nice to hear you call yourself my girlfriend.”

I knew what he meant, and I felt like I was glowing as we headed inside the house. We were hand in hand, but instead of going through the back door, I led Shay to the front. It was his moment. After that first step inside, I knew I was right. The place was filled with people. His teammates, girls, and other friends all cheered for Shay. He was grabbed up by the guys, being literally pulled away. He flashed an apologetic smile my way, but I waved it off.

I was pulling my phone out when Linde appeared next to me. He handed me a cup. “Here.”

“What is it?” But I took it, sniffing it. The alcohol was strong enough to kill a fly in the general proximity. “Holy shit, Linde. That’s strong.”

He laughed. “Last party before we all head home tomorrow. I figured what the hell, right?” He draped his arm around my shoulders, nodding to where Shay had been taken. A group formed at the bar, and he was being challenged in a shot-drinking contest. “Thinking it’s going to be a rough morning for both of you tomorrow.”

“Here.” I wasn’t listening. I gave him the cup back. “I need to text my friends.”

Thirty minutes later, Kristina and Casey both walked in. Their eyes were huge. The music had gotten louder, and I had to shout into Kristina’s ear. “Thanks for coming!” I nodded in Casey’s direction. She was glancing around the room. The edges of her mouth turned white. I asked Kristina, “Is this going to be okay for her?”

Kristina put her mouth next to my ear. “We talked about it before coming, but she’s okay. She isn’t going to drink, and she’ll stay with you or me the whole time, but she trusts these guys. That asshole wasn’t partying with other football players when it happened. He was at a fraternity.”

“Okay.” I reached over to tap Casey on the arm. She moved closer, leaning forward to better hear me. I asked her anyway, “Are you okay being here?”

She nodded, giving me two thumbs up. She yelled back, “I won’t drink, and I’ll leave if I get uncomfortable.”

“Me, too!” Kristina joined in, then we heard a nearby shriek and someone launched themselves at us. Two skinny arms wrapped around us, followed by another pair of equally thin arms. Sarah and Laura bounced up and down, both beaming and both looking flushed in the faces. “You guys are here! We weren’t sure. We’re all partying together.”

They were so excited, but the shared look between Kristina and Casey told me they weren’t. Both were cautious and wary.

“Yeah.” Casey untangled their arms. “Should be fun.”

“Shots, shots, shots!” Laura began clapping, turning, and looking around. Then, “Kreigerson! Get over here. Look who’s here!” She looped an elbow through Casey’s.

A guy ventured over, holding a drink in each hand. His dark hair was slicked back, and he had a baby face with round cheeks, smooth complexion, and dark eyes to match his hair. He was good-looking, and I saw the lurking arrogance. He knew it, too. “Hey! Winchem! It’s been forever.” He handed her one of the drinks. “Fuck yeah.”

She shook her head. “No, thank you.”

“Ah. Come on.”

“No. Really. No, thank you.”