Hate To Love You

“You’re lying.” We heard voices nearing the door, and Gage glanced to it. He leaned forward again, dropping his voice. “We can talk about it later, but you have to talk about it. Okay? You have to. You can’t keep that stuff bottled inside.”

The door opened, and a doctor came in behind the nurse. I was poked, prodded, and questioned over the next thirty minutes. They told me I suffered a concussion, and half of my face looked like a giant red onion. Other than that, the doctor said I was lucky that librarian was there.

I suppressed a shiver.

Before they left, after taking another round of vitals, the doctor said I could go home in the morning. He asked Gage, “Are you going to fill her in on everything that’s happened since her attack?”

“I hadn’t gotten to it yet. I will.”

He nodded his approval, saying to me, “I’ll be back in the morning for another set of rounds, so I’ll be seeing you one more time before you can go home. It’s nice to have met you. I have to say it’s been an honor and an adventure all at the same time.”

The nurse laughed softly, following him out.

I asked Gage, “What was that about?”

He sighed. “Shay.”





Shay.

His name was an echo in me, resonating like a bouncing ball.

“What about him?”

Gage’s chest rose and held, before lowering again. He sat up straighter, his hands on his lap, and he started. “Okay. Here goes. You don’t know this, but if you were to leave this room, there are two policemen outside your door.”

“What?”

“Carruthers and the other guy are in the hospital. Those police are out there for your safety, since Carruthers already tried to attack you one time. They figure he might retaliate again, but I don’t see that happening.”

“Did I hit them back or something? Are they here as patients?”

“No.” A quick laughter slipped out. “They’re in here because Shay beat the shit out of them.”

The ball dropped.

“What?”

“The librarian told someone in administration about you, and they called your roommate. Your roommate is an idiot. She told your floor’s RA that you had one friend, Kristina. She knew about me, so at the same time she was calling me, so was Mom.”

“Mom.” I groaned. This would get interesting.

“I wasn’t totally thinking clearly. Mom was on one line, going nuts. I could hear Blake in the background yelling.”

I groaned again.

“I do have to give it to your friend. She was calm. I mean, I could hear how scared she was, but she was calm at the same time. I hung up with her, and I talked to Mom.”

“How did Shay find out?”

He held up a finger, his Adam’s apple moving up and down in a swallowing motion. “That’s why I’m explaining that I wasn’t thinking clearly. I blurted out that she needed to call and let Shay know. After that, I can only assume her phone call to him wasn’t good. The next thing I know, I’m parking outside the hospital. Mom and Blake are on their way, and Casey calls.”

Casey?

Gage continues, “Word spread fast who attacked you, and before the cops could get to Carruther’s apartment . . .” He let me do the rest.

“Shay did.”

“Exactly.” He nodded. “He beat the shit out of him, and he was still there, pounding him when the cops arrived. They were all arrested and brought here to get checked out. Shay knocked Carruther’s friend out cold at the apartment, and the guy woke up here. He said something smart to Shay, and they didn’t have enough cops in the room. Shay went at them one more time. He didn’t make contact, but he tried. He almost did. A nurse stood in the way and stopped him. He would’ve had to hit her if he wanted to hit them, and before he could get around her, the cops were on him by then. They were all separated after that and handcuffed to their beds.”

“No!” My mind was racing. They could charge Shay. They could do worse than that. He could go to prison.

“There’s talk that they’ll throw out Shay’s attack if they throw out Carruthers’s first attack on you, when he lunged at you after the football game.”

“Really?” It worked like that?

“They had legal jargon. I talked to a lawyer, but Shay’s a big fucking deal. The football coaches got involved. I wouldn’t be surprised if the college Dean did, too. Carruthers agreed. He’s only going to be charged on the attack outside the library if Shay can walk.”

“He went for that?” I wasn’t thinking about Shay going Terminator on me. I’d process that later.

Gage shook his head, shrugging his shoulders. “My guess is that they threw some big intimidation his way for him to do that. I don’t get it, either, but Shay isn’t going to be charged.”

“That’s unbelievable.”

“Yeah, but it means that Shay’s banned from the hospital. He can’t see you until you leave.”

Shay did all of that for me.

I couldn’t—I still couldn’t process it all.

A different thought came to me. “Where is everyone? Mom, Blake, Kristina?”

“Your merry band of friends were here all day, but they went back to the dorm. Same thing for Mom and Blake. They were here during the day. They drove all day and night to get here, but they went to a hotel to get some sleep. It’s my shift. I was gone for classes today, and I wanted to hear what was being said on campus about the whole thing.”

A different feeling of dread slithered around me. I didn’t want to hear that, either, not yet. “What day is it?”

“It’s Wednesday morning.” He turned the television on, and I saw the time.

Two in the morning.

I was attacked Monday after midnight, so early Tuesday.

I lost an entire day.

All that happened over a twenty-four hour period.

I was going to pass out again.

Gage softened his voice. “It’s all over campus that Shay went after Carruthers. The rumors were rampant, and those were the ones people were telling me. I can’t imagine what people are saying that I haven’t heard.”

“Oh, my God.”

I could. My last year at high school flashed before my eyes, but Shay defended me. That was…

I felt the walls closing in. The room shrank in size.

What was going on?

Was the oxygen cut off, too? There wasn’t any left.

“Kenz.” Gage stood up, leaning over me. His eyes filled with concern. “Hey. What’s happening?”

I couldn’t talk. Why couldn’t I…

The room was tipping over now.

I heard muffled voices.

Then it was all black again.





I fainted.

In the grand scheme of things, it was embarrassing, but survivable.

My mom swooped in when she got to my room later that afternoon. Her arms opened wide and an afghan draped around her back and arms. She pulled me in for a hug, rocking me gently.

“Oh, honey,” she crooned, smoothing a hand down my hair like I was a pet. “You scared me so much. I didn’t know what happened. I didn’t know if you were alive, if it was just you, if Gage got attacked, too. An uninformed mother’s mind is not a good place.” She pulled back, sticking out her bottom lip in a pout as she continued to smooth down my hair. “You’re just as beautiful to me as you were the day you were born. The whole moldy pickle look is in.”