Because that’s where I went before I came back to the Blue House. The police brought me to the hospital and after the doctors looked at me my Forever Dad came to bring me here. The doctors were all women. They wanted to see if I was injured because they all knew that Crystal with a C kidnapped me. I couldn’t pretend that none of this ever happened. Plus the police took Crystal with a C away. So I’m guessing they figured it all out.
My new Forever Sister is named Baby Wendy. It’s very little so it needs a lot of milk. You get milk from the refrigerator even though I know it comes from cows. But my Forever Mom says she is breast-feeding it instead. She is upstairs in the bedroom doing it right now.
I am in the living room picking at my fingers. My Forever Dad is making lunch. He doesn’t understand. Finally I walk into the kitchen and grab my breasts to show him. “There’s no milk in these,” I say.
He drops a bowl of potatoes and puts his hands on his forehead. “No—Yes—Ginny, just slow down,” he says.
“I gave my Baby Doll milk from a towel. Every day.”
“From a towel?”
“You dip the towel in the milk and then let the baby suck. You get the milk from a carton in the refrigerator. Not from these.”
He looks the other way. “It sounds like Gloria didn’t breast-feed you,” he says. He starts picking up the potatoes. “You couldn’t remember something like that, though. You were too young. Did you really use a towel when you wanted some milk? Didn’t you have any cups in the apartment?”
But that was two questions so I don’t say anything.
He keeps talking. “Some moms feed their babies with milk from their breasts,” he says, “and some moms feed their babies with cow’s milk. It’s called formula, actually. But it’s a matter of personal choice.”
He doesn’t understand. “My new Forever Sister needs milk,” I say.
“Right,” he says.
“It has to drink a lot of real milk,” I say.
“Right again,” he says. “But let’s not call your sister ‘it,’ okay? And remember, she is drinking real milk. Upstairs right now with your mom.”
“No,” I say. “That isn’t real milk. Real milk comes from the refrigerator.”
He opens the refrigerator and takes the milk out. Then he pours a glass and puts it on the counter.
“There,” he says. “That’s real milk. Real cow’s milk.”
“Exactly,” I say because sometimes exactly means right. I pick up the milk and walk to the stairs.
“Ginny, what are you doing?”
“I’m bringing the milk upstairs.”
“No,” he says. “Don’t do that. Put it back on the counter. Baby Wendy drinks breast milk.”
I put the glass of milk down.
“Let’s try one more time,” he says. “The milk that you drink comes from cows, but babies can drink milk from their mothers, if their mothers decide to breast-feed. See?”
When people say See? they mean Do you understand? but my Forever Dad doesn’t understand at all. “I know where milk for humans comes from,” I say. I pick up the glass of milk and point to it. “This is human milk. You know, hu-man.”
“You can pronounce it however you want, but it still comes from a cow,” he says.
“So then why won’t my Forever Mom give it to the baby? Why won’t she give it milk that’s real?”
“She is giving it milk that’s real.”
I look at him over my glasses and shake my breasts at him again. “But there’s no milk in these,” I say. I have had breasts for approximately one year and I know that milk doesn’t come out of them. Nothing does.
“Ginny, put your—Watch—Just listen,” he says. “I know you’ve been through a lot. I’m sorry if this is all confusing, but you’re just going to have to trust me. Wendy is getting plenty of real milk. You can talk with Patrice about it when we go to see her after lunch. It’s really nice that she agreed to set up an appointment with you today—after all, it’s the weekend. But I bet she’ll want to talk some more about going back to school on Thursday, too. Do you still think you’re ready?”
He is changing the subject so I have to focus. I can’t get distracted. My new Forever Sister needs real human milk but it isn’t getting any and I know that Gloria will forget to feed my Baby Doll because Crystal with a C is in jail and no one will go to check on them. In my brain for a second I see my Baby Doll’s tiny eyes and face. Its eyes used to blink when I picked it up.
I come up out of my brain. The glass of milk is still in front of me on the counter. In my brain again I can see myself dipping a towel or my shirt in it and then putting the wet part in my Baby Doll’s mouth.
“Ginny?”
“What?” I say.
“Please, don’t worry about Wendy. She’s getting everything she needs. I’m really sorry about how intense things are around the baby right now. Your mom is being extra cautious, staying upstairs all the time. It would help a lot if you didn’t hover so much when she comes downstairs. Just...just give her some space, will you? You’ll see. We’ll all get back to normal soon. You’ll go back to school next Thursday, and then everything will slowly go back to the way it used to be. Everyone is safe. You’re home, the baby is healthy and your mom is doing well. Everything is going to be fine. Crystal is in jail now, and your baby sister has plenty to drink.”
“Crystal with a C,” I say. Then I go to my room.
31
EXACTLY 2:08 IN THE AFTERNOON,
SATURDAY, OCTOBER 23RD
“It’s been two days since you’ve been back at the Blue House, and now you have a baby sister,” says Patrice. “A lot has changed.”
That wasn’t a question so I don’t say anything. I just sit in the flower chair and look at Patrice.
“Your Forever Parents tell me you’ve been pretty quiet at home. What’s been going on in that brain of yours? Ginny, I want you to try to connect. I want to know how you feel. I want you to tell me how you feel about being back. Now, I know that Crystal didn’t hurt you, but—”
“Crystal with a C,” I say.
“All right, Crystal with a C didn’t hurt you. The doctors at the hospital said you were perfectly fine, but I wonder if Crystal with a C said some things when you were at her house that you’re still thinking about. Things that you remember. Could you tell me what those things are?”
“She said my Baby Doll is fine with Gloria for a few weeks but she likes to spend at least a few hours with them every day. But now Crystal with a C is in jail. So I need to go back to the apartment.”
She writes something down. “I wish she hadn’t humored you about your Baby Doll,” she says. “Remember, there was no baby in that apartment with you. The police would have found it. They even went back to look again when you told them it was in the suitcase. Now, how do you feel about what happened to Crystal with a C?”
“Angry,” I say.
“That’s good. It’s okay to feel angry when you miss someone. It’s okay to be mad and miss Gloria, too. Did you know that when you were gone, your Forever Parents missed you very much?”
“Yes,” I say. Because they told me.
“Everyone missed you, Ginny. The whole town. The whole state, even. Everyone was looking for you and saying prayers and worrying. They wanted to find you and keep you safe.”