“I don’t know.” She shrugs. “Hope maybe?”
“You gotta know that was one-sided, Ax. I never gave up hope in us. I’ll take responsibility for backing off you a bit, but after that night, you were so weak. I would’ve been an asshole to pursue more than friendship with you. I should’ve spoken up sooner, but I’m still not sure you’re ready for what I want with you. I’m so afraid that, now that my feelings are on the table, you’ll find your piece of this life, grab on with two hands, and have no need for me. I knew that if I wanted a chance with you, if I really wanted a shot at making you happy, I’d have to time it perfectly.”
“So I guess Valentine’s Day exactly four years later was the perfect time.”
“Is it?” I dip down and kiss her. “I want this night to be the start of making new memories, replacing the old. But only if you’re ready.”
Her dark brows pinch together. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
My muscles tense. “Up until a few hours ago, you were with someone else, Ax.”
Her body tenses. “I don’t love him. I never did love him. With you, it’s different.”
How I hope she’s right.
“Mmm.” I breathe in the scent of her skin while kissing her collarbone.
She yawns long and hard then snuggles deep into my chest. “This is going to be great, okay? Us? We’re going to be amazing.”
I squeeze her close. “Or die trying.” I drop a kiss on the top of her head, thinking that nothing has ever felt more right than holding her naked against me while she finds rest. “Go to bed, baby.”
She yawns. “I love you, Kill.”
I grin into the dark, so big and wide it hurts my cheeks. “Love you too, Ax.”
Fifteen
Axelle
The sun reaches through the window, stirring me awake. I’m warm and sunk deeply into the biggest comforter ever when I hear the sound of breathing at my back.
I roll over to find Killian, completely naked, and flat on his back. He managed to push the covers down so they only come up to mid-thigh. I grin and greedily take in his muscled frame, wide shoulders, thick arms, and a powerful chest that tapers to his six-pack abdomen and narrow hips. My eyes widen when I study what’s between those hips. I blink, amazed at how gorgeous he is and marveling at what happened between us.
He loves me.
This intelligent, kind, and gorgeous man loves me.
I suppose I should’ve seen it sooner. He’s been on the front lines of every major event in my life, which is exactly why I thought he’d never be interested in me. I’ve broken down and shown him my ugly side more times than I can count. He’s let me cry and curse him to hell and back, accepting the punishment for all the people who’ve truly deserved it.
My stomach sinks with guilt, and for a moment, it feels wrong being in his arms. Like I’m taking so much more than I deserve.
I turn away from him and bite my lip to keep from crying. Great, Axelle. In case you haven’t already proved it, drive home your psycho by crying in his bed.
He shifts behind me, like he’s stretching, and then freezes for a second. I hold my breath, terrified of what he might be thinking and how he’ll respond now that all our confessions lie bare in the light of day.
Then he moves.
The heat of his body pushes up flush to my back, and his arm snakes around my waist. He presses kisses as soft as butterfly wings to my jaw and whispers, “So it wasn’t a dream.”
My chest cramps at the awe in his voice. I squeeze my eyes closed.
He drops his head back to the pillow and makes a sound of contentment. “Where are you at?”
I cover his hand that’s splayed over my belly with my own. “I’m right here; thought that was pretty obvious.”
He kisses the top of my head. “That’s not what I meant. Where are you at with us?”
I roll over to face him, tangling my bare legs with his. His eyes shine with wonder and curiosity. Framed with thick black lashes, the view practically stops my heart. “I’m right here, Kill. I’m not going anywhere.”
His lips twitch as if he’s fighting a smile, and soon he loses the battle and flashes his brilliant white teeth. “Yeah?”
I laugh and bury my face into his chest. “Yeah, it’s crazy, right? It’s like this is where we’re supposed to be.” However unworthy I feel.
His arms come around me and pull me flush to him. His hard-on wedges between my thighs, but he doesn’t make a move to do more than simply hold me. “I wish I could lie like this with you all day. Shut out the world and keep you as my naked hostage.”
“Mmm, that sounds nice.”
“How about this weekend? We could rent movies and stay in bed all day.”
I peer up at him and imagine spending two whole days naked with Killian and nod frantically.
He laughs low and throaty, the vibration of it against my skin awakening my desire. “Good. Now, I have an econ quiz in an hour and fifteen minutes, so as much as I’d love to move this morning along slowly, I’m afraid I can’t.”