Her eyes widen and her lips part. “But you’re a virgin. I mean are you sure you want it to be me?”
Even after everything we’ve done, after all my confessions, my cheeks still heat with embarrassment. “Who do you think I’ve been saving it for?”
Her eyes fill with tears. “But you know I’m not a virgin, and you deserve—”
“It’s always been yours, Axelle. It’s just been hanging around waiting for you to take it. So, will you?”
A brilliant smile pulls her lips and she nods. “Yes, as long as you’re sure.”
“Never been surer of anything my entire life.”
~~~
I wish I could say I went into losing my virginity like a champ. That I Rico-Suaved my way to bed, threw down my v-card with a “Bam!” and dropped the mic.
But as I stand there staring into the beautiful blue eyes of the only girl I’ve ever loved, only one thought powers through my thick skull.
Condoms.
I don’t have any damn condoms.
It’s like finding the Holy Grail then discovering it’s too heavy to carry. Or having someone hand you the formula to cure cancer, but it’s written in a dead language no one can understand. Or discovering you are motherfucking Superman at the same time you’re diagnosed with extreme acrophobia!
Axelle’s lips are on my neck and her hands dip beneath the waistband of my flannel pants.
I grip her wrists. “Whoa…hold on.”
My heart is racing and my blood pumping so furiously I might fucking pass out with excitement.
She pulls back and eyes me with concern. “Why are you stopping me?”
“I don’t have any condoms.” I run a hand through my hair and groan. “I’m sorry. I just never thought this would happen, at least, not so soon, and I’m totally unprepared.”
“No worries.” She shrugs. “I have some.”
Total. Fucking. Boner-kill.
I’m well aware of the men that Axelle has shared a bed with, more aware than I’d like to be, but that doesn’t mean the reminder of those men doesn’t make me want to punch something or someone, specifically one of the motherfuckers who she’s carrying around condoms in her purse for.
She hops off the bed, and I watch her long legs as she moves to her bag. “Should be in here somewhere,” she mumbles. “Ah-ha!” She whirls around and holds up a strip of gold-foiled condoms.
“Great.”
Her grin falls and she looks between me and the big-fat fuck-you she’s holding. “Hey…” She crosses to me and tosses the condoms on the bed before wrapping her arms around my waist. “It’s just us in this room, okay? Please, don’t let my mistakes change the way you feel about me right now. I…” She sighs and holds me tighter. “I have my own regrets. I’ve made so many mistakes. Don’t let someone like Clifford—”
“Please, don’t say his name.”
“—ruin this for us.”
“You’re right.” I rub her back and hold her close. “I’m being a little bitch.”
She giggles and tilts her head back. “You said it, not me.”
I grin, but it’s slight, desire to pick up where we left off dissolving any hint of humor. “You have no idea how long I’ve waited for you.”
“I’m sorry it took me so long.” She pushes up on her tiptoes and kisses me with all the passion of a woman in love.
I fist my hands in her hair, and she slides her hands down the back of my pants, her nails dragging along my ass as she pushes the flannel to my ankles. I step out of them while walking her backwards to the bed. When her legs hit the mattress, I reach down and pull her tee off. Her dark hair falls in panels down her chest and over her breasts.
A small voice inside keeps reminding me this is Axelle, the girl I’ve dreamed about for all those years, the only girl who’s starred in every single fantasy I’ve had since I was sixteen years old. And now she’s here, in the flesh, and putting every fantasy I’ve ever had to shame.
We kiss until we’re breathless, hands roaming each other’s bodies, not leaving a single inch undiscovered. She grows heavier in my arms as her legs weaken. I scoop her from her feet and lay her down on the bed, her long strong body laid out before me in wanting.
I kiss her breasts, her stomach, her thighs, the backs of her knees, worshipping her with gratitude for all she’s giving me.
Crawling up her body, I fork my fingers in her hair and kiss her as if this will be the last time. Her hand travels down my ribs, leaving goose bumps in its wake, and then she touches me. She grabs my dick in her tight fist, and I groan as the tingling sensation shoots up my spine. Her hand moves back and forth, priming me unnecessarily. I’ve been ready for this for years. I bite her lip and she gasps, releasing me.
I reach for the condoms and rip one off with my teeth.
A sultry grin pulls at her puffy lips, and she takes the condom. “Allow me.”
I bury my face in her neck, kissing her while she goes to work. My hips jerk when her fingers brush against me, sheathing me in latex.