Mason didn’t bat one eye when I asked him for his uniform. He was fully aware of why I needed it. I think it was his way of thanking me for bringing his sister back home. This was the only way I could get past security and anyone else who stood in my way. After we exchanged clothes, he took off saying he’d be back later. Something about needing to go find Giselle, she’d been ignoring his calls since he came home. He was going to drive over to her apartment and tell her Mia had been found.
Shortly after midnight, I walked through the double doors of the hospital like a man on a fucking mission. Praying I could pull it off and see my girl. I spent hours outside waiting for the right moment, hiding in the fucking shadows watching people come and go. Eventually spotting Mia’s dad leaving just after eleven-thirty. Minus Detective McGraw. When he got into his car and sped off, I knew I didn’t have much time.
But it was now or never.
I walked in like I knew where I was going. Hanging my head, hiding under the brim of Mason’s military hat as I made my way down the now dim hallway. Heading straight toward Mia’s room. There were three police officers right outside her door, just as I expected there would be. McGraw’s back was turned to me, talking to one of the cops by the nurse’s station. I approached with caution, my heart beating out of my fucking chest the closer I got to see her. I saw McGraw abruptly turn out the corner of my eye as I passed by.
“Hey, Mason,” he called out.
I didn’t stop. I didn’t turn. I just raised my hand, making sure the cuff on his crew was pulled down past the tattoos on my hand. Giving him a wave as I approached the guards.
Nodding to them before I reached for the handle and quickly walked into the room, closing the door behind me.
“Shit,” I groaned, faltering against the door. Even through the soft lighting of the hospital room, I could still see Mia’s mom sitting beside her on the bed, holding onto Mia’s hand.
Not saying a word, she eyed me up and down, taking in Mason’s military fatigues and badge. Letting out a loud, long breath when she was done.
I removed my hat, giving her the only respect I could. “No disrespect, ma’am. I just wanna see her and make sure she’s all right,” I coaxed, needing her to know.
She glanced back down at Mia who was hooked up to all sorts of machines. I recognized some of them which were similar to what Doc had used. Though most I didn’t know what the fuck they were for. She stood, wiping the tears from her cheeks with a tissue, and adjusted Mia’s blankets to tuck her in. Reminding me how she came from such a loving family. Breaking my heart even more that I was also responsible for this woman’s pain. She leaned over and placed a kiss on her daughter’s forehead, murmuring something in her ear I couldn’t make out.
“You got twenty minutes,” her mom whispered, peering up at me, catching me completely off guard. Never expecting her to say that. “I need some coffee.” With that, I moved away from the door, letting her pass by.
I walked over to Mia and stood at the foot of her bed. Watching my world, my girl, my life, fight for hers.
“She hasn’t woken up yet, but the doctors think that she’s going to be just fine. Physically that is... the rest will take time to heal,” she shared, bringing my attention back to her. She was almost the spitting image of Mia, except for the brown eyes. “Mia has always been a very happy girl, and it breaks my heart that losing her baby... that... this...” Her eyes welled up with tears, struggling to keep going. “But Mia’s a fighter. She’s always been this stubborn, strong-willed, determined girl. Even as a baby there was no telling her no. If Mia put her mind to something then she would do it. I know she will get through this, we all will. Even her father.”
“Why are you lettin’ me stay?” I questioned, yearning to know.
“Because if my son can you give you the benefit of the doubt then I can, too. But please do me a favor. Be gone before I get back.”
I nodded as she turned around and left.
The beeping sound of Mia’s heart monitor brought my eyes back to her. The rhythmic hissing sound of the ventilator echoed all around me. Filling me with some sort of hope. I pulled up a chair next to her bed to get a closer look at her beautiful face. Reaching for her hand, I lifted it and placed it in my tight grasp. Hoping that she could feel my presence, my heart, and my love for her.
I leaned forward, bowing my head in shame over her broken, bruised, cut up body. Laying my forehead on our joined hands. Needing to feel her soft skin against mine, I kissed along her pulse.
It felt like only seconds had gone by, but my time was starting to run out with her. I didn’t know when I would be able to see her again.
Hold her.
Feel her.
Love her.
“I’m so fuckin’ sorry, Pippin,” I choked out, praying she could hear me.
She could feel me.
She could possibly still love me.
Her hand stirred, and I immediately looked up, narrowing my eyes. I was so fucking exhausted, I couldn’t even see straight. I blinked away the haze, thinking my mind was playing tricks on me, but it wasn’t. Big, bright blue eyes stared back at me, void of any reaction. Dazed and confused. She searched my face for I don’t know how long before she blinked, showing me she was really awake. As if she could read my mind.
“Oh my god, baby, you’re awake.” I jumped out of my seat, getting close to her face just so I could feel my lips against her skin. “Jesus Christ, Pippin... I love you so fuckin’ much... I’m so fuckin’ sorry, babe. I’ll do whatever it takes... please... please... fuckin’ forgive me...” I urged, kissing all over her face. Unable to get enough of her. Wanting her to feel my love, hear the sincerity in my voice. The desperation in my touch. So fucking thankful she was awake.
I leaned back, taking her face in my hands to look into her eyes. Ready to get on my knees and beg her for forgiveness. Do whatever it took to make her mine again.
Her eyes widened and her skin suddenly paled, making my heart suddenly drop.
“Fuck... baby, you okay? Tell me you’re okay...”
She stared right into my eyes and softly muttered,
“Who are you?”
“Mia is experiencing situation-specific amnesia. It’s a psychogenic amnesia that can occur in distressed patients as a result of a severely stressful situation they have experienced. It can also be brought on by post-traumatic stress disorder. In her case, we think it’s the result of being shot in the back and/or losing the baby. She has no recollection of either incident, the shootout or even being pregnant, to begin with. It could also possibly stem from what she saw while being held captive. At this point, it could be a number of different factors. Although, like I said before, her body has no trauma other than the bullet wound and the incision from the emergency C-section that was performed. Her mind shut down to protect itself. As far as I can tell, there were no signs of negligence nor physical or sexual abuse.”