Will shook her hand while simultaneously avoiding the giant beaver in the room. “It’s, uh…it’s nice to meet you.”
“Oh, believe me,” the patient continued, “the pleasure is all mine.”
Boy, this chick was laying it on thick.
“Melody, could you place another gown over Mrs. Allen’s legs?” Will asked, and I nodded. You bet I can.
“Oh, I don’t mind,” Elise started to chime in, but I ignored her, haphazardly tossing another paper gown over her legs. She flashed a glare in my direction, but I chose to ignore that, too.
“Dr. Cummings?” Elise questioned as Will sat down on his rolling stool and started to put on a pair of sterile gloves.
“Yes?”
“It’s Ms. Allen,” she corrected with a wink. “I’m newly divorced.”
Will just nodded in response and set his focus on setting up his sterile instruments. “So, we’re just here for your yearly pap smear, is that correct, Ms. Allen?”
“Please, call me Elise, and yes, just a yearly pap smear.”
“You’re just going to feel a little pressure as I insert the speculum,” he instructed and started the exam. “Now, I’m going to swab your cer—” He paused midsentence with a perplexing look etched on his face. Two seconds later, after grabbing for an instrument that looked a hell of a lot like oversized tweezers, Will pulled a small piece of laminated paper out of the patient’s vagina. He set it down on the metal table and just stared at it, his face equal parts shocked and horrified. He looked so cute, a little wrinkle between his eyes, but I’d never seen him make that face before.
Morbid curiosity got the best of me, and I moved toward his side to read the wording written across the laminated paper.
212-555-1111
<3 Elise Allen <3
A gasp left my lips before I could stop it, and Will looked in my direction.
Not only had the patient dressed up like a hooker and not worn underwear to her appointment, even flashed The Beave to him before the appointment had gotten started, she’d also come to the fucking appointment with her phone number inside of her vagina.
Inside of her vagina, people.
What in the ever-loving fuck was this?
And quite frankly, wouldn’t a piece of laminated paper inside your hoo-hah hurt?
Elise sat up on her elbows and smiled down at Will. “I’m a huge fan of your show, Dr. Cummings,” she purred, and I had the irrational urge to vomit. “I’d love for you to call me sometime.”
On top of the irrational urge to vomit, I felt like sprinting out of the exam room. I didn’t want to be anywhere near Elise, or Will for that matter, as jealously turned to alarm.
Was this the kind of shit I would be dealing with all the time?
I wasn’t sure if I could handle a relationship like this. Women weren’t just visibly flirting with him during appointments, now they were using their actual vaginas as wingmen to hand out their phone numbers.
What else was next?
Holy hell, I didn’t even want to think about that. Women were crafty. And horny women were crafty and determined. I wasn’t sure I could handle all of this. Will wasn’t exactly a normal guy anymore after the show. He wasn’t just a successful physician. He was more than that now. Women all over the country, hell, probably even the world, knew him.
And they knew him as Dr. Obscene.
That nickname didn’t exactly discourage vaginas stuffed with phone numbers.
I couldn’t stop myself from wondering, Is it really a good idea for me to be involved with Will?
“Will, we need to—”
Looking both ways for witnesses, I pushed her toward the door to the empty patient room and opened it, ushering her through before she could finish her sentence. She went easily enough, too busy trying to figure out what I was doing or how to say what she wanted to say to fight me. It didn’t really matter to me which it was, as long as she was distracted enough to let me get started.
From the moment of the inappropriate treasure discovery, it’d felt like the rest of the exam of Ms. Elise Allen had taken forever. Lust rushed over me so powerfully it was blinding, and it had nothing to do with a woman desperate enough to put her number in her vagina.
Instead, it was the other woman in the room, the one who’d looked on as Elise flirted, drumming up enough self-control not to say anything in response when I wouldn’t have blamed her at all if she had.
I pushed Melody toward the table with a firm hand to her stomach and laughed internally as her bouncing eyes tried to make sense of it all.
My lips went to her ear to speak before she could, and when I did, it came out in a raspy whisper. “That little gasp,” I explained, a weakness I couldn’t avoid acting on. “When you figured out what it was, I heard you gasp.”
All that self-control ruined by one sharp inhale.
“Will,” she breathed back shakily.
“I lost my mind when I heard you gasp, and I haven’t been able to think about anything else but making you do it again.”
“Will,” she murmured again, her heart racing so hard I could feel the vibrations of her chest against mine.
“I have to be inside of you, Melody.”
Somehow, I’d managed to put the right words together to explain my teenage-like hormonal response to a simple reactionary noise eloquently enough that she understood—and not only that, but wanted me too.
“Jump up,” I told her but put my hands to her hips so she didn’t have to do the work all on her own. The paper crinkled beneath her ass as it landed, and for the first time ever, the sound of it fired something erotic inside me.
Grabbing the fabric at the top of her scrub pants, I bunched it in my hands and yanked it down as she lifted her hips to ease my way. They caught on her shoes, so I took everything off at once and spread her at the knees.
With practiced efficiency, I pulled the stirrups up and locked them into position. I couldn’t have missed the widening of her eyes.
“You’ve got to be kidding me.”
I didn’t reply verbally, not at first, instead lifting her feet and placing them pointedly in each position. She eyed me carefully, clenching her knees tightly together in denial.
But I didn’t even have to think about how to bring her around to my way of thinking. Her skin was soft and alluring and invited me further into her space with every inch my hands skimmed. As I moved up the line of her calves and around to the inside, her knees parted at my push, and her hips jumped at the approach of my touch.
“I’m serious. About this and you and the fact that you’ll be in a whole lot of trouble if you move your knees even…one…inch…closer together.”
Her throat bobbed as she swallowed, and I leaned forward to touch my lips to the apex of her thighs as if called.
“Just relax, Mel,” I whispered there, right against her warm, humming skin.