“I was standing out there for over an hour before you walked onto the balcony,” he answers the question written on my face.
“So this was your plan all along?” I ask coyly.
He releases a short laugh. “I don’t think anything about this was ever planned, Guinevere.” I smile at how true his words ring. Nothing about this summer went according to my original plan. Maybe that’s the beauty of it. Because it was completely unexpected in the most satisfying of ways.
He touches his lips back to mine, treating me to a soft kiss. “I never planned this.” His voice is contemplative.
“Me, either.”
“Now I can’t think of anything I want more.”
“Me, either,” I repeat, running my fingers through his hair and down his back, relishing in the feel of his skin. He briefly closes his eyes, melting into my touch, arching his back before returning to a kneeling position. He secures the condom, then positions himself between my thighs. I swallow hard, this moment bigger than I ever thought it would be.
Julian arches a brow, silently asking if this is what I truly want. I nod once more. He pushes into me, slowly, deeply, completely. My body fuses to the mattress as a sensation of absolute fulfillment washes over me. He leans down, cupping my face in his hands. His eyes sear mine as he moves so reverently inside me, taking me by surprise. I expected sex with Julian to be…different. Less emotional, less passionate, less…intimate. But this isn’t sex. Not with him. Not with us. It would never be just sex.
I move with the steady rhythm he sets, relishing in every gentle thrust as he fills me to the brim, stretching me in a way no man ever has, then pulls back before continuing the same pattern. Neither one of us speaks a single word. There’s no need, no requirement to fill the vacant space with declarations of lust or desire. The silence is more striking, the unspoken words more poignant than insignificant ramblings just to make it seem as if we’re in the moment. Because we both know we’re there, that we’ve finally made it to this place we fought against for too long. No more.
Julian rolls his hips into me, his motions measured and penetrating, delivering the utmost pleasure. As he nuzzles the crook of my neck, he finds my arms, pinning them on either side of my head.
“I don’t know how much longer I can hold back.” His voice is strained.
“It’s okay.” I wrap my legs tighter around his waist, circling him. “Let go,” I whisper, taking his earlobe between my teeth, nibbling on it. That’s all it takes for his muscles to tighten, his harsh grip on my wrists painful, yet satisfying. As his movements become increasingly more intense, I close my eyes, my core clenching as another wave of desire washes over me, much to my surprise.
“Don’t fight it,” he murmurs into my ear, his own breathing labored. “Just let go.”
He drives into me with even more ferocity and I scream out, shattering around him as explosions of light obscure my vision. His mouth clamps onto my neck as he finds his own release, his body trembling and jerking. He thrusts one final time, then loosens his grip on my wrists, collapsing on top of me, spent and sated.
My fingers drift up and down his back, savoring the grooves of his tattoo, toying with his hair as I try to calm my breathing. I stare at the ceiling, everything seeming different now.
“Wow,” Julian exhales, struggling to catch his breath just like me.
I laugh. “You can say that again.”
He rolls off me and stands, removing the condom and tossing it into the trash bin next to the nightstand before crawling back into bed, draping the duvet over our bodies. His arms wrap around me and I blow out a contented sigh.
But I still don’t know what this means for us, if this changes anything. I open my mouth, about to ask, when Julian places a soft kiss on my shoulder blade, tightening his hold on me.
“Shh,” he soothes. “I’ll be right here when you wake up. I’m not going anywhere.”
All the tension immediately leaves my body as I melt into his embrace, his promise filling me with hope.
Chapter Thirty-Three
The melody of the lapping ocean waves and Julian’s gentle breathing meet my ears as I slowly rouse from a restful sleep. The sun shines in the room as seagulls squawk, the sheer curtains blowing near the open French doors we never shut last night in the frenzy of finally experiencing each other. And experience each other we did. At least four times.
Sensing I’m awake, Julian traces a delicate circle around my hipbone and I moan, relaxing into his touch as he stirs my desire once more. I flip over to face him and place gentle kisses on his chest. He’s so warm. So virile. So…perfect.
He grabs my chin, tilting my head back and leaning down to kiss me. I tear away, covering my mouth with my hand.
He cocks a brow. “What is it?”
“Morning breath,” I say from behind my hand. “No one likes morning breath.”
He chuckles, the rumble hitting me deep in my core. He wraps his arms around me, bringing me closer into his body, the heat coming off him electrifying.
“I like morning breath.”
“Then you’re weirder than I thought.”
“Nah. I’m just weird for you.” He grabs my chin once more. When he leans in for a kiss this time, I don’t hide, his mouth touching mine. “Mmm,” he moans, his tongue tracing along my lower lip, coaxing me open. A slave to whatever he wants, I part my lips, our tongues meeting in a gentle dance.
I hook my leg over his waist, inching as close as I can. As our kiss becomes more heated, his hold on me tightens and he brings my body on top of his. Straddling him, my hips circle a slow rhythm against him. He groans as he hardens even more, craving me as much as I hunger for him.
“Do you feel what you do to me?” He grips the back of my neck, fierce, jarring, intoxicating.
“Yes.” I close my eyes, continuing to tease him.
“Do you want me?” His hands find my waist, controlling my motions as he thrusts against me.
“God, yes.”
That’s all he needs to hear. He reaches for the nightstand, grabbing the last condom. He’s about to open the packet when I rip it from his hands. Passing him a flirtatious grin, I tear it open, my eyes remaining locked on his as I carefully roll the condom on him. My touch on his length causes his nostrils to flare, his jaw to clench.
Once the condom is in place, I hover over him, my mouth a whisper from his. Our breath intermingling, I lower myself onto him, taking him as deep as I can before pulling back. He brings his lips toward mine, but I escape them. I’m no longer concerned about morning breath. I like this game, the playful desperation as Julian tries to capture my mouth with a kiss, to no avail.
My motions remain slow and sensual as I savor in him. Just like he did to me the night before, I grab his wrists, pinning them on either side of his head as I shade his face with my hair. He flexes his fists, and I can tell it’s killing him not to be able to touch me. I know all too well. I was in his place last night.
Our eyes linger on each other as we remain in this moment. I give Julian everything he deserves as I take everything he’s willing to give me until neither one of us can take anything else and I collapse on him, both of our bodies quivering and trembling.
In the aftermath, I remain locked in his embrace, my head nuzzled into his chest as I relish in the sound of his steady heart. He delicately traces circles on my shoulder blade, my arm slung over his waist. As we lay there in solitude, my attention is drawn to the scars on his abdomen.
“What’s the story behind these?” I ask as I shift my hand to the three circular marks, brushing my fingers against them.