“Maybe,” I murmur noncommittally.
“Wow, Phee, that was so enthusiastic.”
“Sorry. It’s just—”
“Knox.” She sighs deeply. “I know.”
“Believe me, I wish it weren’t Nate. I wish it were anyone but Nate. But he’s like…”
“An STD.” Lila nods sagely.
“What?”
“Irritating. Indisputably linked to your lady parts. Can go years without making an appearance. And ultimately… incurable.”
“Wow. That was beautiful, Lila.”
“I try.” She grins. “So, let me see if I’ve got this straight.” She begins ticking off points on her fingertips as she speaks. “You finally take my advice and go out with another man. Then, like clockwork, Knox shows up at your house. He tells you not to see said man anymore in that scary, intense way of his. And then you kick his butt to the curb. Right?”
I nod.
“If I wasn’t such a good friend, this is the part where I’d scream I TOLD YOU SO at the top of my lungs.”
Chapter Five
One of these days, I’m going to burn that fucking field hockey skirt.
Nathaniel Knox, upon returning home from college and finding his best friend’s sister all grown up.
I blink in confusion. “What are you talking about?”
“Do I really have to spell it out for you?”
“Apparently.”
“God, it’s like dealing with an Amish girl on her Rumspringa. Starting from square fucking one.” Lila shakes her head and pins me with a steely look. “Phoebe. Honey. He was jealous.”
I snort. “No, he wasn’t.”
“He was.” She sighs, deeply exasperated. “Why else would he have shown up that night? As in, the first night you’ve ever heeded my sage advice and gone out with a hot guy?”
“Trust me,” I choke out. “Nate didn’t come over because of some kind of long-buried romantic feelings. Parker probably asked him to check in on me.”
“Oh, my poor, sweet, dim-witted little virgin.” Lila shakes her head. “Have I taught you nothing?”
“I don’t follow.” My eyes narrow. “And I may be dim-witted, but you’ve blown a goddamned fuse.”
“He. Was. Jealous!” She casts her eyes heavenward. “You’re worse than Amish. Swear to god, I’m living an Anne of Green Fucking Gables episode. Anne’s First Crush.”
“Hey!”
“Phee, get with the program. He wants your bod.”
“Did you just say he wants your bod?”
Her mouth opens, closes, and opens again. A hint of a blush colors her cheeks. “Maybe.”
“Wasn’t that the slogan of those horrible ’90s commercials for men’s body mist? You know, the kind that smells like testosterone mixed with lighter fluid?”
“BOD spray.” Lila nods. “Or, as I like to call it, Eau de Jersey Shore.”
“Eau de Seventh Grade Boy,” I counter.
She giggles. “Eau de Small Penis.”
We both dissolve into laughter. I’m wiping tears from the corner of my eye when Lila’s hands clap together abruptly, startling me. My gaze flies back to hers and I find she’s staring at me, all humor forgotten.
“Hey! Focus! No more tangents.” She leans forward. “We were talking about Knox and your deluded belief that he came over out of some kind of brotherly duty.”
“It’s not deluded; it’s the truth. He came because he thought I was in danger with Brett. Which, it turns out, I was. Have you seen the news? He’s kind of a minor-league sociopath.”
A few days after Nate’s surprise visit, I logged onto the web and was immediately assaulted by news stories about my gala date.
BRETT CROFT ARRESTED IN CONNECTION TO KIDNAPPING
CHARGES BROUGHT AGAINST BILLIONAIRE CROFT HEIR
FAMILY FUED: CROFT COUSIN’S SECRET VENDETTA Apparently, no matter how much money you have, it’s still not enough to bury kidnapping and attempted murder charges. Let’s just say, I was more than relieved that I hadn’t called Brett for a second date.