True to his word, Reid spent the next several days focused on trying to find what he’d lost with Jess. From horseback riding to lounging on the dock by the river, they spent all their time together. In the evenings, they would cook dinner before curling up on the couch and watching movies. It was exactly how it used to be before he was signed. It was nothing like what he wanted now.
Try as he might, not a day went by that he didn’t think of Chloe. The silence was deafening. He hadn’t heard from her since the last day at his parents’. He itched to hear her voice, to call to see how she was, but he wouldn’t. He couldn’t. As it was, his guilt was crushing. With a sigh, he washed his hands and dug through his bag for a change of clothes. The corner of his notebook caught on his T-shirt. The sight of it made him want to slam his head against the mirror. He was antsy. He felt caged in the open space. He wanted noisy streets and neon lights. He wanted the feel of the warm ocean breeze against his face. He wanted to be home.
Reid stood motionless as the realization sunk in that Memphis was no longer home. Sure, he loved it. Loved the vibe and the people, but it wasn’t home. Not anymore. Not for a long time. When his phone rang, he nearly jumped out of his skin. Darting from the bathroom, he grabbed it off the nightstand, startling Jess as she walked into the room.
“Hello?”
“Reid, sorry I haven’t called before now, but I wanted to check to see if you were doing okay.”
Reid sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “It’s fine. I’m good, Tom.” He looked at Jess and shrugged, his face apologetic as he mouthed he would only be a minute. With a nod, Jess stepped out of the room and pulled the door shut.
“You staying out of trouble?” The slight edge in Tom’s voice caused shame to creep up on Reid again.
“I am. I promise. I’m going crazy being here, but not because of that.”
“What do you mean?” Tom asked, surprise clear in his voice. “Did something happen?”
Reid groaned and paced the length of the room. “No. Nothing happened. It’s just . . . it doesn’t feel like it used to. It’s making me stir-crazy.”
Tom chuckled. “Not loving the country life anymore?”
“Memphis isn’t the sticks,” Reid deadpanned.
“Where you lived certainly is. Actually, I might be able to help you out with that. It’s the other reason I’m calling.”
“You mean it’s the main reason, but you weren’t going to bring it up until you had a chance to gauge my mood?” Reid retorted, smirking
Tom cleared his throat. “Whatever. I got a call from MTV today. They wanted to know if you’d be interested in performing a mashup with Jack Green.”
Reid smiled as excitement surged through him. “Hell yes, I would.”
“I thought you might say that. The catch is, he has other obligations during rehearsals for the show, so you’d need to come back to LA early.”
“Book my flight,” Reid answered without hesitation. “I’ll be there tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” Tom blurted. “You don’t need to come back that soon. You can wait two or three more days.”
Reid shook his head, his eyes darting toward the door before he spoke, his words hushed. “Tomorrow, Tom. Please.”
A beat of silence passed before Tom spoke. “Okay. I don’t know what kind of flights they’ll have booking something this late, but keep your phone handy. It might take a while, but I’ll text you the details as soon as I have something.”
“Thanks,” Reid exhaled, his shoulders relaxing.
“Oh, and Reid? We’re going to talk about all the shit that’s happened recently when you get back. Just giving you fair warning.”
Reid swallowed. “Okay. See you soon.”
Dropping the phone on the bed, the excitement of going back to LA drained from his body. Jess was going to be upset that he was leaving so soon. Weary, he walked out of the bedroom to break the news. However, her reaction surprised him. She was quiet, distant, but not angry. She just looked sad. It was so much worse than her anger.
Jess traced patterns over his forearm as they lay in bed later that night. He tried to talk to her, but her one-word answers and quiet demeanor eventually led to both their silence. “We’ll see each other again soon,” he tried again, his voice reassuring.
“Why don’t you ever say you love me?” she asked softly. Her question caused Reid’s brows to dip in confusion.
“What are you talking about? I say it all the time.”
Jess pulled in a deep breath. “No. You don’t. I always say I love you, and you always respond with ‘you too.’”
Reid licked his lips and worked to keep his breathing normal. “That’s what I’ve always done. For as long as I can remember.”
“I know,” she admitted. “It’s just sometimes I’d like to hear you say it.”
Reid pinched his eyes shut and pressed his lips to her temple. “You know how I feel about you.”
“Do I?”
“Jess,” Reid implored, his throat tight.
With a huff, Jess turned to her side and pulled the covers tight around her shoulder. “Get some sleep. You have to get up early. I’m fine. We’re fine. It’s just been a long day.”
Reid reached across the bed and pulled Jess against his side. “Don’t go to bed mad at me. Please.”