He lifted his eyes. “What is?”
With a shake of my head, I looked out the giant window that overlooked the snow-covered mountains. “This feeling. I’ve never before felt it with any other woman.” Turning my attention back to him, he was grinning from ear to ear.
“It’s like the moment she walks into the room I sense her. I can actually feel her there before I even see her. She looks my way and I literally have to catch my breath.”
He leaned back in his chair and seemed to get lost for a moment before he laughed. “I remember the first time I asked your mother out.”
You could see the love on my father’s face and it warmed my heart. I knew my love with Ava was just as strong.
“She turn you down?” I asked laughing.
“Yes!” he said. “She turned me down flat. Told me there was no way she would get mixed up with a cowboy.”
“Wow. I never knew that.”
“Oh, she made me work for that first date. I can’t tell you how many times I went into the little bank in Helena she worked at part time. Your grandmother was so angry with me. She told me I was wasting my time chasing after a city girl. That even if I did manage to make her marry me, she’d get bored of living on the ranch and leave me.”
My smile faded. The same thought had crossed my mind a few times with Ava. Even though she grew up on a ranch, she loved her place in Austin. It was one of the main reasons I wanted to move into the house in Helena. Granted it wasn’t Austin, but it was still the city.
“Did Mom ever feel that way?” I asked.
He shrugged. “If she did, she never told me and never gave me any indication she felt that way. The first time I brought her to the ranch I remember her eyes lighting up as we brought in some new cattle. The whole time she sat on the fence and took it all in. When we were finished and I walked up to her and I’ll never forget the smile on her face. Then she said, ‘I could watch you do that every single day for the rest of my life.’ It was right at that moment I knew this was the girl. The one I would spend the rest of my life with.”
“I only hope that Ava and I are as blessed as you and Mom.”
“You are. I see it in the way that girl looks at you. Hell, the very first time the two of you were together in a room I’m positive everyone saw it.”
The light knock on the door caused us both to turn and look. Ava grinned and said, “Hey, I don’t mean to interrupt, but I’m feeling rather tired and was going to excuse myself.”
I jumped up. “Thanks again, Dad. I’ll see you in the morning?”
“Sounds good. I’ve got that meeting in town I’d like for you to be there for.”
With a nod, I replied, “Sure. I’ll be there.”
“Good,” was all he said as he glanced over to Ava. “Rest up, sweetheart. Glad to have you home.”
“It’s good to be home,” Ava said with bright eyes.
By the time we got to the stone house, Ava was a basket of nerves. I was tempted to tell her I didn’t want to know anything that came out of Kate’s journal, but my curiosity was getting the better of me.
She sat down on the sofa and wringed her hands together.
“Jesus, Ava. You’re kind of starting to freak me out. Did my sister do something illegal?”
Her eyes snapped up to mine. “What?” Frowning, she said, “No. God no, it’s nothing like that.”
I pulled a seat from the dining room table over and sat down facing her. “Then tell me what it is.”
“Okay well, I wasn’t sure if I should keep this to myself but I can’t. I need to tell you and the only way I know how to do it is to just say it.”
My heart was pounding so hard in my chest it felt like it was going to jump out. “All right.”
“Kate was pregnant when she died.”
I sat there for a few seconds letting her words sink in.
“What did you say?”
She sighed, “Oh gesh, don’t make me say it again, Ryder.”
Staring at her, I felt my chest squeezing tighter, like someone had a damn vise grip on it.
The only thing I could do was stare at her. My sister was pregnant. Oh God. We not only lost her, but we lost her child as well.
“Do you need me to really say it again?”
I shook my head. “No,” I barely spoke.
Scraping my hands down my face, I let out a frustrated sigh. “What in the hell?” Dropping my hands back down, I hit Ava with question after question.
“How far along was she? Why didn’t she tell anyone? Did Jackson know?”
Ava took in a deep breath and slowly let it out. “I don’t think she was that far along, I’m not sure why she hadn’t told y’all yet other than she thought she had time to figure things out first and then tell everyone. Yes, Jackson knew and he had asked her to marry him.”
“What?” I stood up. “She was only a senior in high school! What in the fuck did she think she was going to do with a baby?”