Meaningless denials, because there was no denying what my heart and my mind now screamed.
I had tried . . . God, I’d tried to keep my distance from Lucas after that night with him. I’d tried to build up my hate again. I’d forced myself to think of Kyle constantly. I’d told myself repeatedly that what had happened and what I’d felt had been nothing more than a product of some sick, twisted savior complex from when he’d saved me from William.
I had told myself so many things . . .
But Lucas had stolen a piece of my heart a day at a time before I’d willingly handed over the rest. It was dangerous and stupid to do, I knew that, but I was helpless to keep it from him because I was already gone to him.
Wholly, irrefutably his. Our pasts and future and his darkness be damned.
My devil, who constantly fought against the darkness he was so wrapped up in, was still incredibly affectionate, considering he wasn’t supposed to be.
He had gone back to working at the office a couple weeks ago, and while it made my days different, lonelier, I was glad for the distance. I’d wondered if constantly being in a house with Lucas was the cause behind my shift in my affection toward him—even if we did spend time apart—but had gotten my answer that first night he’d come back to the house.
I could still vividly remember the way my heart had taken off, trying to burst from my chest when those dark, dark eyes had sought and found me. In that moment, it’d felt like I was looking at what I’d been missing for months . . . home.
The only thing that had kept me where I’d stood in the kitchen when all I’d wanted was to run into his arms, was the devastating realization that I’d never had that feeling looking into Kyle’s eyes.
Since that night, there had been a change between Lucas and me. A slow burn that was known, but not acknowledged, and with each passing day we’d gotten closer to giving in.
And now we had to play a role for William.
Once dressed, I finished curling my hair that we had re-dyed recently, sprayed myself with the perfume that Lucas had bought me a few days before, and checked my outfit in the full-length mirror one last time.
I was in a pair of torn skinny jeans with a black silk tank and white blazer, and one of my favorite things my shopper had bought: a pair of leopard-print satin, pointed-toe Louboutin stilettos that put me at the perfect height for Lucas to brush his mouth across my forehead.
As far as Lucas was concerned, I still maintained they were just clothes, but my closet did make for fun days as I put outfits together, and waited to see what Lucas did and didn’t like.
He liked me in these shoes, as I had found out when I’d been breaking them in weeks ago.
When I was satisfied with the way I looked, I turned to leave and froze when I found Lucas standing in the doorway, his arms crossed over his chest, with a heated look as his eyes devoured every inch of my body.
My breathing deepened from the warmth of his stare, and I wanted to bask in the desire that swirled inside me.
When his eyes finally made it back to mine, his intense stare and gruff voice made my heart race. “You can’t wear that.”
My head jerked back in confusion. “Why not?”
“Because I will break every rule in front of William if you do.”
The confusion melted away, and I bit back a smile as I walked toward him. “I’m ready then.”
“Briar,” he growled with a hint of a warning.
“Yes, Devil?” My lips spread into a smile, and I reached out to brush my fingers against his jaw as I walked past him. “Come on,” I whined when he didn’t move. “I want to go outside. We’re going outside.” I bounced excitedly as I waited for him to reach my side.
His worry faded as my excitement transferred to him. “Don’t jump in those. I don’t need William harassing me because I had to call the doctor during our visit.”
“I’ve been practicing—”
“Jumping?” he asked with a laugh.
“No, running.”
“In those?”
I lifted my foot and looked behind me at the superfine heel. “Of course. I need to be able to run away from you.”
Lucas’s dark eyes danced, and one of his large hands gripped at my waist, pulling me closer. “And where would you go?”
“Don’t worry, I wouldn’t get far,” I promised softly, letting the tips of my fingers trail over the spot on his jaw I had touched just moments before. “I’m your blackbird. These wings are broken without you near.”
His handsome face transformed into something like awe for bated seconds, and then his mouth was on mine for the first time since that night all those weeks ago. The force of his kiss sent us stumbling back until we were pressed up against the wall, and a moan crawled up my throat when he bit down on my bottom lip and tugged gently.
“Briar, I should warn you,” he said against my mouth, his voice rough. “I’m gonna kiss you now.”
I’d barely cracked a smile before he was kissing me again, taking and taking and taking in a way I hadn’t known I’d been craving. And I was sure it wouldn’t ever be enough.
And soon everything was forgotten except for Lucas and his lips and our kiss.
Chapter 25
Day 70 with Blackbird
Lucas
“We’re almost there,” I said into the phone, and locked my jaw when William demanded to know why we were late.
We would be five minutes late, seven at the most, because kissing Briar and showing her how incredible she was would always be more important than my mentor.
I could’ve lied and said we were late because I’d had to teach Briar a lesson or because there’d been more traffic than I’d expected, but I knew he would see through it. Whenever William asked about Briar and our home it was there in his tone, he was searching for something that shouldn’t be there—and it was there now.
“I said we’re almost there. Goodbye, William.” I hung up before he could ask any more questions and looked over at where Briar was resting her head on her arm. Her fingers were weaving through the wind as we drove, and long tendrils of hair whipped around her . . . I had never seen her so relaxed.
“Are you ready?”
“Yes.” She looked over at me, and her ease vanished. “Don’t display affection at all,” she recalled quietly.
“Good. And if I tell you to do something, you have to do it, Briar.”
There was a pause before she nodded hesitantly. “You keep saying that, but what does that mean? What would you make me do?”
I pressed my knuckles under her chin, forcing her to look up at me. “I need you to stop thinking that way. I can see your fear, but there shouldn’t be any. I’ve told you, William crossed a critical line that day he showed up at the house and tried to train you.”