We stay silent.
The sky above us is a clear blue. Not a single cloud. Lying back, I close my eyes and relax, soaking in the warm rays, the wind softly caressing my skin.
“Will you miss me?”
His question knocks all air out of my lungs.
I turn my head to him and find that he’s pulled his cowboy hat over his face. The corner of his mouth tugs up. It’s only thing I can make out, the only thing that gives away this isn’t as serious to him as it is to me.
“I guess so.” A hint of sadness seeps into my voice.
“Good.” His lips twitch. “When you leave me, I want to be in your mind for a long time.”
You’re already in my mind and I haven’t even left yet.
There’s no way we can feel so much attraction and have worlds separate us, and yet it’s happening.
Kellan draws his hat back. “You’re awfully silent.”
I avoid his eyes as my glance turns back to the lake.
“I’m just thinking how beautiful this place is. That’s all.”
That isn’t even a lie. This place is beautiful, but it wouldn’t hold my heart if it weren’t for him.
He props up on his elbow, towering over me and shielding my face from the sun. And then he leans into me to steal the kind of kiss that makes me rip off his clothes, the kind that makes me forget we’re not a couple.
We’ll never be.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
“Kellan,” I draw out the word as I drop the hayfork. “There’s something wrong with the horse. It looks sick.”
“Which one?” his voice bellows a moment before he storms into the barn.
“That one.” I point my finger to a huge, black animal with the most bloated tummy I’ve ever seen. The poor thing’s so bloated, I wouldn’t be surprised if people could smell it within a five-mile radius.
Kellan’s hand brushes over the horse’s head soothingly. “That’s a she. The mare’s about to give birth.”
I stare at the horse, completely dumbstruck.
“What?” Kellan laughs. “You thought she was overweight, didn’t you?”
“I don’t want to lie, but yes, I thought she was.” Which is a lie. But I’d rather let him think I thought the poor animal lacked physical activity than admit that I thought she was bloated. My hands fly to my throat, suddenly nervous and in fear of the animal’s wellbeing. “Shouldn’t you be calling the vet?”
“We’re in Montana. She’ll be done before he arrives.” Laughing, Kellan shakes his head and plants a kiss on my cheek. “You’re adorable, you know that?”
More like stupid.
“I’m glad you think that because I definitely feel more like a fool,” I say dryly.
“You’re a fool for thinking that.” His gaze shoots to the mare. “We’ll get started soon. I need you to stay here and help.”
My eyes widen. I’ve never been a fan of blood or pain. I want to run and wait this one out, but instead find myself asking faintly, “How?”
“Keep talking to her, sing to her. She likes that. If she can’t manage on her own, I’ll intervene, but that rarely happens.”
I stare at him. “You’re not going to be here?”
“I’ll be outside, finishing up.” He squeezes my hand at my horrified expression. “Don’t worry. Just tell her everything will be fine. Giving life is such a beautiful thing. I want you to be there for her.”
***
He’s right. It is a beautiful thing. The whole birthing only lasts about fifteen minutes, but it feels like a whole new life experience. I expected it to be gross, but it isn’t. It’s everything but ugly.
The mare doesn’t writhe in agony. As I keep stroking her head, she remains silent, graceful. I laugh as the tiny legs of the foal squeeze out of her, followed by the rest of its body. I’m crying as the baby slides to the floor, wrapped in a gleaming membrane.
I’m crying buckets and I don’t even know why.
Scratch that.
I know exactly why. I’ve never been so happy in my life. I’ve never felt so much in awe. For a long time, I just stand there and watch the tiny creature struggle to get to its feet.
“You okay?” Kellan asks from somewhere behind me. His voice is soft.
I nod and sniff. My hands wipe at my face to get rid of the annoying tears, but let’s face it. What’s the point when I probably look like a puffy fish anyway? “I just had no idea it would be like this.”
“After watching this my whole life, it still surprises me every single time.” His arms wrap around me, hugging my back to his strong chest. “It’s okay to cry. You did great. I’m really proud of you.” He kisses the top of my head, and then spins me around to look at me. His thumb brushes over my cheek to wipe away the moisture. “Come on, we need to celebrate.”
Shaking my head, I peel myself away from him and head for the huge doors.
Kellan follows after me. “Where are you going?”