Stop it. I hate it when my mind goes to those dark places. I’ve always been so bubbly and positive. This planet has taken more than my sense of security.
It’s taken my dignity, my future, my happiness, but worst of all, it’s taken my personality. I don’t like this new somber Mandy. She’s scared all of the time, living in a constant state of terror.
It’s not fun.
“Just go to sleep,” I whisper to myself. When I get like this, I sink into a downward spiral until I go so deep into the black that I don’t think I’ll ever be able to climb back out.
I climb up onto the dashboard and curl up in front of the windshield. A blue light flickers on and off behind me, lighting up the windshield in a soft blue light.
The reflection in the glass is a girl that I don’t recognize. Hollowed out cheekbones, sad tired eyes, dull red hair, down-turned lips. She looks empty and alone, anxious and fearful. I just want to give her a hug but I can’t.
The familiar hollow feeling invades my chest and I pull my arms and legs in, holding myself tightly. I miss home. I miss Avery.
I just wish that someone was here with me.
My breaths are slow and shallow as I stare past my reflection into the dark valley. My eyes settle on a familiar sight. There’s a large rock sticking out of the grass, looking out of place. There are no other rocks anywhere near it and it looks so lost and alone, stuck there abandoned and forsaken like a poor lonesome castaway.
I’ve spent countless hours during the long sleepless nights staring at that dismal rock. Sometimes I picture myself going out there and rolling it back to the other rocks where it can be home and feel safe with its friends, but I never do. It’s too scary out there so the rock is destined to stay alone forever.
I take a long, slow breath as my vision settles back on the hurting girl looking back at me in the windshield. Will she ever talk to anyone again? Will she ever get to hug another person or get another kiss?
I bring my knees all the way up and tuck in my elbows, covering my vulnerable core as my lethargic heart beats in my sunken chest.
Sleep won’t come tonight. I already know it.
Like I said, I hate the nights the most.
During the day, I’m alone with the dinosaurs.
But during the night, I’m alone with my thoughts.
And my thoughts are the scariest thing out here.
two
The ferocious and dominant Straykeer goes on. It has been many moons since he left the Drandroka village searching for his beloved mate, and he has not yet found her.
His legs, as powerful and sturdy as the tuloi tree, are tired and worn, but he goes on. For her. He longs to hold her in his solid arms and yearns to drink from her delicious culip.
Straykeer has crossed the many valleys, mountains, and rivers of Zandipor for his mate. He has fought and killed many fanged beasts as tall as the trees and as angry as an erupting volterno on his way to her.
And yet, he still cannot find her.
He will search until the end of his days, for she belongs in the strong arms of the ferocious and dominant Straykeer.
The last of the delicious boomercan is gone and Straykeer stomps out the small fire, ready to keep searching for her. His belly is full and he pushes forward.
But the smoke from the fire attracts all sorts of beasts. And they are coming this way.
The ferocious Straykeer rips out his two bone swords and flexes his arms. He is ready for anything. He is ready to fight for his mate. He is ready to die for his mate.
He waits with a short sword in each hand, staring at the thick vegetation in the forest and waiting to see which unlucky beast is trying to keep him from his mate.
He grinds his mighty teeth, his powerful chest heaving as he waits with his soum pounding. The soum that beats for her.
Straykeer has not met his gorgeous mate but he has pictured every detail of her beauty. She has brown hair like the Saku Avery, a big strong nose that hangs down her face like the root of an enger tree, mighty teeth that can crack rocks, and a large chin the size of a lolack fruit in the hot season. She is beautiful. And she will be Straykeer’s.
He just has to deal with this unlucky nuisance first.
Knuckles turn a light shade of blue as he squeezes the handles of his swords. The beast is close.
The fat yellow leaves in front of him shake and tremble as the beast emerges.
“Straykeer!” Yusita says, popping out from behind the plant.
The dominant Straykeer sighs. There will be no fight. Yusita is a fellow Drandroka, also on the lookout for his own mate with a sweet culip to drink from.
Another Drandroka follows behind him. Waskata. He left the village as well, looking for a mate. They seem to be having as little luck as Straykeer.