Amnesia (Amnesia #1)

His hand stroked up my back. “Absolutely. Whenever you’re ready. Take your time.”

“I think I’m ready,” I answered. “I like it here, this town. I want to become a part of it—not just the town mystery, but an actual part.”

“You are a part, Am. You always will be.”

“Not as Sadie, though,” I whispered. “As me, as Amnesia.”

Speculation had only grown throughout town. Rumors were flying that I remembered who I was and that I really was Sadie. I never said a word, though. How could I? I wasn’t positive who I was, and I wasn’t going to say I was her unless I knew for sure. For now, the only people I’d talk to about remembering my name was Eddie, Maggie, and Dr. Kline.

“Not many people would want to stay in this tiny town,” Eddie murmured.

“You did,” I said. “Why?”

He gazed at me, the blue of his eyes so deep it pulled me in.

“Because of Sadie?” I whispered.

He nodded, then added, “And because this is home, where my parents are. The general store. That place became a refuge of sorts for me after Sadie disappeared. I spent a lot of time there working, and I sort of fell in love with the place.”

“I can see why. It really is amazing.”

He grinned, both dimples charming me. “It’s a good challenge, keeping the old-school charm but also bringing it into the modern world.”

I loved his passion for the store. I could see it in his eyes. I even felt it in the air when I walked in.

“She was lucky,” I mused.

He tilted his head. “Who?”

“Sadie. For having you as a best friend and as a crush… maybe even a first love.”

“Have you had any more memories?” he asked, rubbing his thumb over my lower lip. He always got a little sad when I talked about Sadie. Even though I was Sadie, I didn’t think of myself as her. I couldn’t. I couldn’t be someone I didn’t know and couldn’t remember.

All I could be was me. Amnesia. For some reason, I felt I was different than Sadie, the girl I was before I nearly drowned. I couldn’t explain why or even how I knew; I just did. Dr. Kline said personality changes after something like what happened to me weren’t uncommon.

I shook my head. “No.”

Eddie leaned down and kissed my forehead, a gesture I’d almost come to rely on. It was probably the most comforting thing I’d ever felt.

“When do you have to be at work?” I asked.

He groaned. “I have to open.”

Pushing up into a sitting position, I reached for the hot chocolate he’d brought. The warmth of the cup against my palm made me smile. “Thank you for the cocoa.”

“Anything for my girl.” He smiled.

I glanced at the clock and frowned, sticking out my lower lip in a pout. “You don’t have time for a shower with me.”

“Sorry, baby. My dad would be pissed if I was late.”

“I know,” I said, understanding. “It’s okay.”

“Lunch?” he asked.

“Definitely.”

He smiled, tugging on the ends of my hair. “I’m doing some scheduling this afternoon. How about I put you on starting next week?”

I nodded enthusiastically. “Can we work the same shifts?”

He grinned. “Duh.”

I smiled widely, so happy in the moment.

Laughing, Eddie slipped out of bed, kissing me on the cheek on his way past. “Drink your chocolate, baby. I gotta get dressed.”

I made a sound of sadness, and he laughed more. I watched him pull on his clothing, a pair of jeans and a Lock Gen hoodie, and slip his feet into his Adidas. He patted the front pocket of his jeans, making sure his keys were still there, and then held out his hand to me.

Slipping mine into his, I let him tug me to my feet and collided with his chest. I felt swallowed whole when he wrapped his arms around me. Burying my face into his hoodie, I tried to soak up as much of him as I could, enough to last me a few hours.

“What are you going to do this morning?” he asked, still holding me.

I shrugged. “I’ll go upstairs and see what Maggie’s doing. I don’t have an appointment with Dr. Kline for a few days.”

“Call me if you need me,” he said, finally pulling away. He pursed his lips. “We need to get you a phone, Am.”

“Once I start working, I’ll be able to.”

He frowned. “You need one now.”

“It’s only a couple weeks.” I pointed out.

He grunted as if he didn’t agree but wasn’t going to argue (at least not right now) and leaned down to kiss me softly. “See you at lunch.”

“I’ll meet you at the store.”

I went with him to the door. His lips lingered over mine before he finally groaned and walked away. Inside, I smiled to myself, carried the hot chocolate and some clothes into the bathroom for a shower, and got ready for the day.

The scent of coffee wafted down the steps when I opened the bathroom door a short while later, and I knew Maggie was up. Instead of going straight upstairs, I put away my pajamas and went back into the bathroom, plugging in the blow-dryer Maggie let me borrow.

Since it was cold out, I didn’t want to let my hair air-dry, and I wanted to look nice today since I was meeting Eddie for lunch. It didn’t take long to dry my short hair using a brush and the high heat setting. When it was done, I smoothed my hands over it and admired the way it shined beneath the light.

It was less wavy today because of the brush, and I found myself pondering a style as I looked it over in the mirror. The idea of a braid popped into my head, and I wondered if I even knew how.

On impulse, I picked up the brush again and sectioned out a piece in the front, not really knowing what I was doing. The feel of the silky, thick strands between my fingers sent me spiraling back into a memory from the past…

Laughter faded out the instant booted, heavy footfalls sounded overhead. Instantly, I shrank back, my stomach coiling into a tight knot. I shouldn’t have laughed. I shouldn’t have smiled. It was almost a guarantee to summon him, something I never, ever wanted.

Dragging my body back into as much darkness as I could find, I cowered against the cold stone. My body creaked like I was old, my joints protesting in ways I knew they wouldn’t if I were able to get up and move around.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful to feel the sun on my skin, the breeze in my hair?

He was coming. All wistful thoughts were banished from my mind. Survival kicked in, and my body tensed. The beam of a flashlight hit me in the face, blinding my eyes. I shrank back, throwing up an arm to shield myself.

“What the hell is this?” he roared.

I began to shake. He surged forward, grabbed me by the arm, and towed me forward. I felt some cuts and scrapes on my bottom and legs break open, and I wanted to cry. They’d just been healing.

“What have you done to yourself?” He raged, grabbing my chin and forcing it up. The light blinded me again. “I told you not to mess with your hair!”

“I’m sorry,” I whimpered, squeezing my eyes closed.