“Since the accident, I’ve fluctuated between feeling dead inside and being high on adrenaline. There was no in between. I was either riding a rush, or craving the next one. With you, I feel calm but alive. I feel whole. Balanced. And the longer we were together, the longer that feeling lasted. It wasn’t just when you were near; the feeling would stay. Normally I’d be jumping out of airplanes or off of cliffs every chance I get. But you were magic, Selene. I don’t know how, but you smoothed out all my edges.”
His lips brush against mine, just a whisper. “I am so sorry for hurting you. I let fear get the better of me and I acted like a complete asshole. You’re beautiful and perfect, and fuck, I love you so much.” He closes his eyes. “Please let me kiss you. I’ll go if you tell me to leave, but god I need to kiss you right now.”
I give him the slightest nod and his lips come to mine. He lights me up; my body comes alive at his touch. He doesn’t hold back. He coaxes my lips apart with his tongue, opening me to him. His kiss is deep and pure.
He pulls away and touches my cheek. “I’m sorry it took me so long to realize the truth.”
“What truth?”
“That you’re the only risk worth taking.”
He kisses me again, and I thread my arms around his neck. All the tension I’ve been carrying melts away at the feel of his body pressing against mine. He wraps me in his arms, holding me close.
“Are you sure you’re not just chasing what you can’t have again?” I ask.
“No,” he says, looking me in the eyes. “When it comes to you, I don’t need the chase. I love you, Selene. I always will.” He leans his forehead against mine.
I smile. “I love you too, Ronan. I love you too.”
Epilogue: Selene
The hum of the airplane engine roars in my ears and my heart beats fast. I get a familiar tingle in my limbs as we gain altitude. Over the last six months, I’ve jumped with Ronan nine times. Today is number ten.
I’ve gotten good enough that I can jump on my own, without Ronan or an instructor. It’s literally the last thing I ever thought I’d enjoy doing, but I love it. I love every second of it, from the moment we get on the plane to the moment we’re on the ground.
I’ve long since settled into my new role as VP of Operations for VI. Ronan has to split his time between the Seattle office and Edge in San Francisco, so I run things in Seattle. There was plenty of water cooler talk about the two of us when he announced my promotion, but it was followed closely by the announcement of our three-hundred-million-dollar government contract, so the rumors didn’t last. Everyone knew my role in getting that contract, so it was clear the promotion was not the result of me fucking the boss.
Not that I mind fucking the boss. Not one bit.
Kylie looks at me with wide eyes. Braxton has been up with us several times, but it wasn’t until today that we finally talked Kylie into jumping. One of the instructors will jump with her, and she has a radio in her helmet with a crew member on the ground to help guide her down. But I can see the nervousness on her face.
“You’re going to be fine,” I say, pitching my voice to be heard above the engine.
“I’m scared,” she says. “And excited. And fucking scared.”
I laugh. “I know. But this will be amazing. Trust me.”
Braxton turns around and checks her harness again. He’s usually as amped as Ronan for a skydive, but I think having Kylie here is making him nervous. He’s run his fingers beneath the straps at her shoulders at least a dozen times, making sure they’re tight enough.
Ronan takes my hand and brings it up to his lips, kissing the backs of my fingers. I smile and we both look out the window. There are a few puffy white clouds high above us, but otherwise the sky is clear. He was in San Francisco until late last night, and I still feel the relief of being together after missing him all week. I’m glad he doesn’t have to go back for a while.
Some people might get sick of each other when they’re together pretty much all the time. But Ronan and I have settled into working and living together, and I can’t imagine it any other way. He moved into my house a few months ago, after we both admitted he more or less lived there already. We have plenty of room at home, so we both have our own spaces. I insisted he take my dad’s old study and make it into an office, so he has a place to work and unwind. I love that the room is being used again. It was always so sad and dusty before, with no one who needed it. My whole house feels better with two of us living there. It used to be too empty, just me with all these rooms. Now I have someone to share it with, and I know my parents would be happy to see us there, living and loving in the space where they lived and loved Braxton and me.