All the Ugly and Wonderful Things

Miss Humphries wrote out the ticket in an unusually crooked hand for her, glancing up at them as she did it. They didn’t touch, even by accident. The girl stood with her hands clasped behind her. He kept a thumb hooked in a belt loop and the other hand in his pocket. When Miss Humphries laid the ticket on the counter, he pulled his hand out of his pocket, removing a roll of bills held with a rubber band. He snapped the rubber band off and began counting out hundred-dollar bills. She felt corrected for having assumed he couldn’t afford the ring.

“The resizing fee will be adjusted, because so much excess gold will be removed. After that’s weighed, we’ll refund that amount to account for it.” She watched the bills pile up and when he finished, she counted them into the cash drawer. “You’ve given me one too many.”

“That’s for you, for being so nice,” he said.

“I, well, that’s not—”

“It’ll be ready Friday?”

“Yes.”

“Thanks.”

A moment later, they were out the door, leaving her to stare at the hundred-dollar bill. In more than forty years behind the jewelry counter, she had never before been “tipped.”

*

When the man and the girl returned on Friday, Clifford was at the counter. He was about to make his own less diplomatic discouragement speech, but Miss Humphries intervened.

“Ah, here you are,” she said in the same bright voice she had used before to try to send them away. “Clifford, they’re here for the resized ring with the star sapphires.”

Her brother raised his eyebrow, but rose stiffly and went to the back room. He had said more than a few choice words about resizing an adult’s engagement ring to fit a child.

When he returned with the ticket and the velvet presentation box, he still had his eyebrow up. Worse, he stood at Miss Humphries’ elbow while she counted out the refund for the gold removed from the ring. It made her glad she hadn’t mentioned the extra hundred dollars which had gone discreetly into her purse instead of the till.

“Well, shall we make sure it fits?” she said after she closed the cash drawer.

Now that the moment came to open the box, Miss Humphries didn’t know how to proceed. Normally, when it was a regular ring, she laid it out on the velvet mat for the customer to try on. When it was an engagement ring, the man usually opened the box, and sometimes they had a little impromptu pre-wedding right there in the store. Miss Humphries loved those moments, when the woman got starry-eyed and the man looked thrilled and mildly terrified. It was the closest she ever got to romance outside a movie theater.

She passed the box to the man and, after a momentary hesitation, he opened it and took out the ring. It looked ridiculously small pinched between his thumb and finger. The girl didn’t hesitate. She held out her hand and he slipped the ring onto her narrow finger. The setting was too large for her hand, but the plastic sizer had done the trick for the band.

It turned out to be one of those moments Miss Humphries loved. The girl looked at the ring on her finger and up at the man with sparkling eyes. He looked nervous but happy. They were not father and daughter. Romance. For better or for worse.

When the man leaned down over the girl, Miss Humphries thought he would kiss her. Instead he said, “Now you know, okay? From here on out, only you. I promise.”

The girl nodded.

His gaze flicked to Miss Humphries and he blushed. “Thanks.”

“Thank you. I hope she enjoys the ring. Don’t forget your box, dear, and I’m sending you some jewelry cleaner, too.” On impulse she reached under the counter for it. “The sapphires are delicate and they need to be cleaned properly.”

After they were gone, Clifford said, “There’s something very wrong there. I wish you’d talked to me before you sold them the ring.”

“And what would you have done? He paid in cash.”

Going to the front window, Miss Humphries looked out. Across the street, the two stood next to a motorcycle, the girl smiling as she buckled on her helmet. After she climbed on the cycle, the man ducked his head and then, then he kissed her.





4

CUTCHEON

Jesse Joe come back to the shop with Wavy, her looking happy for a change. Girl that age ought not to have so many troubles, but she did. Looking at it that way, them two was about made for each other. He’d swum his share of sorrows.

That day, they was both smiling.

“Well, you’re sure in a fine mood,” I said. I figured she’d do what she always did. Give me that shy smile and dart off like a spooked cat. But no, she waltzed right over and held out her hand like she was the Queen of England. On her finger was a diamond ring. Bigger than the one my Paola wore for forty years.

“That is a real purty ring. Where did you get that?”

Damned if she didn’t open her mouth and say, “Kellen and I are getting married.”

He got this real uneasy look on his face and said, “I don’t know if you better tell people that, Wavy.”

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