I nod, burning arousal pulsing through me like it’s the only blood in my veins.
His eyes flare, and he raises up taking my hands in his, pressing them to either side of my head. His hips rock against me. I feel his length. I squirm, needing him inside me. Aching for it. Begging him with my eyes to hurry up.
The tip of him slips toward me, and we both inhale. A grin moves fleetingly across his mouth.
His eyes never leave mine as he presses in, the length of him pressing and sliding. God, the pressure. It’s exquisite.
I widen my legs. Seeking more. There’s no hard thrust. It’s hard yet gentle, steady but relentless, and my body gives up to him bit by bit. It feels like it should be this way. This relentless push into my heart. This steady and permanent and irreversible move toward forever. He pushes until he’s fully inside me, his hips pinning mine down into the bed.
“Shit,” he groans. His arms are trembling. “You feel so good. God, you feel so good.” He lowers his mouth to mine, and our tongues meet as he begins a slow rock.
I’m making noises I don’t even recognize. The feel of him, the look on his face, the love in his eyes. For a moment as I look into them, I recognize the way he looked at me, that night so long ago. And I know. He was telling the truth. He loved me then too. His rhythm picks up, his breathing quickens, and his body trembles and strains.
“Fuck,” he groans.
Then he rolls, pulling me on top of him. “I want to see you.” His hands anchor my hips and he presses me down, fusing us together, before thrusting up into me. His eyes are greedy watching my chest, then watching me. The look on his face is one of reverence and helplessness, like he wants to wait to make it last but he can’t. It doesn’t matter, I think. We’ll have other chances. And I can’t stop either. The sensations are too strong. This is amazing. This is what it’s supposed to feel like.
“Oh my God,” I manage, grinding down on him, taking him as deep as I can. “I can’t … too good. Oh God …”
“God, do it, baby. Let me watch you fall apart on me.” His fingers dig into my hips. “Please.”
My body pulls tight, burns, as I continue moving, rocking, pushing down, seeking the relief. The force inside me building to such an extreme, it’s almost painful, but I can’t stop.
“Oh fuck, the way you look right now, baby. God, I love you so much, Jazz.” The words tumble out of him, desperately.
I move once more, twice, and my climax rockets through me. I’m crying out my love for him too, spasms shuddering through me.
Somehow he sits up, burying his face in my neck as I continue to move on him, his hands on my hips drag me up and down. His fingers are bruising my skin, but I don’t care. His breath is hot and heavy and frantic against my skin, and I clutch him to me feeling the moment he gives in to his orgasm, letting it take him hard. I’ve never experienced anything sexier than watching him fight it, keep it at bay for me, and then letting it utterly decimate him. Pouring himself into me.
His heart is pounding so hard, I can feel it throughout his whole body.
We’re slick with sweat, and shaking. The fan above us chills my skin.
I tug his hair gently, urging his head back, and he tilts his face up to me.
“I love you too,” I tell him and press my lips to his forehead. “Now if you don’t tell me what you told Bethany Winters that day outside school, I’ll never let you do that again.”
He exhales and chuckles a surprised laugh. “You’re not ready to hear it.”
I arch back. “You’re kidding, right?”
He shakes his head. “Nope.”
“You’re an asshat, you know that?” I glare down at him.
“I may have heard that once or twice. But I’m glad you dropped the arrogant.”
He’s right. “You haven’t struck me as arrogant lately,” I say, surprised.
“I never was.” There’s vulnerability in his tone. “I was just trying desperately to keep my distance. But I’m completely helpless against you.”
I run my fingers through the hair at his temple.
“I’m sorry, Jazz,” he says again. And I know he’s still apologizing for that night.
“Me too,” I whisper. “I should never have slept with you the way I did. Without being honest.” I lift my shoulders. “And I’m so proud of you and your determination and drive. That part that had you keeping your distance is part of what I love about you. And it allowed me to find myself too.”
He closes his eyes and curves his back, resting his forehead against my heart.
We make love again, slowly, reverently, repeatedly. He explores my body and makes me his any way he can. I’m limp and utterly exhausted when I finally fall asleep in the crook of his shoulder, my hand across his heart.
SUNLIGHT FILTERS THOUGH the blinds. The body curved around mine is warm at my back and holding me close. I smile, utterly content. I would like to wake up this way forever. For the rest of my life. I don’t want to freak Joey out, so I know I’ll never say that out loud.