“Maybe we act the most genuine in this valley of uncertainty. We have to rely on our gut instincts, animal reactions, basic cravings. Your incomplete framework for reality requires that you make a leap in the dark, and that’s no defeat, no flaw.”
I sat up, excited for her revelation. “Yes! I think I have deeper faith because I’m required to operate without this by-the-book framework propping me up. All of us”—I drew a big circle with my forefinger—“All of us Lost Boys have had to recreate our framework of belief from scratch, because everything we knew was wrong. Someone like Deloy has managed to drop a lot of the rage he used to feel against them. I haven’t been so successful. William Blake and other poets make unsure leaps into the dark. There aren’t concrete explanations for the wonders of this planet. Like me. I’m always going to be stumbling through this world, wondering if I’m doing the right thing.”
“You have the heart of a poet,” she replied while reaching over to unsnap my cock ring. “We all suffer from the ruin of childhood dreams. Most not as badly as you. I never wanted to be a nurse. I wanted to be an airline attendant and travel the world. But being a nurse was more practical, and my father was willing to pay for the schooling. Mahalia got accounting school.” She shrugged, already bored.
“But now you heal people. And look damned sexy doing it.”
“May I take your order?” Deloy was at the door, waving a fork around. “How do you like your eggs?”
I shrugged. We were used to seeing each other naked, wearing stranger things than cock rings. “Over medium?”
“Same,” said Oaklyn, clearly surprised by her roommate.
Lazarus trudged in then. He plodded right on over, then jumped up on the bed. He did a belly flop between Oaklyn and me, laying his giant head on my thighs. Oaklyn scrunched his ear in her hand.
“I love this damned dog,” she said, shaking her head with wonder. “Whatever you guys did to Shumway wasn’t nearly enough retribution.”
“Did what?” Deloy asked innocently. “Once Maximus is mayor, he’s gonna have Shumway arrested for animal cruelty.”
Oaklyn stuck out her lower lip. “Good. Nothing is bad enough for that sick man.”
“And the mayor,” mumbled Deloy, but he’d already turned and headed back to the kitchen.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
LEVON
Aside from seeing Ladell Pratt hoverboarding down Watchtower Street in front of my shop, I was having a pretty good day.
Things were going great with Oaklyn. I’d taken her to dinner out on Route 9 the night before at the only nice place around. That was part of the reason we were adding a grill onto The High Dive bar. Not that it’d be nicer than the Route 9 place when done. But it’d be the only decent place to sit down and eat in Avalanche.
I had to face facts. I was a fool in love and I’d never been in love with anyone. Oaklyn had won me over—not that that was even her intention—with her exotic beauty, her scientific know-how, her thoughtful outlook on life and the universe. She was right. I’d been battling the endless grief of being thrust into frightening adulthood at a young age. And it was the battle itself, the pressures and unease, the ambiguity of my loss of faith that was ultimately my salvation. Those in Cornucopia had their beliefs set in stone. They had their infinite heaven to look forward to as long as they followed the rules. But for me, the agony of mistrust would also prod me on to a divine prosperity of my own.
Oaklyn helped me believe there was hope for me yet.
After the carpenters finished installing cabinets in my dojo and split, I checked YouTube again, as I’d been doing habitually. I wasn’t quite sure that Pratt would actually upload his blackmail video with our names as keywords. What I was sure about was that I’d hear about it within half an hour from someone, probably Dingo, and so far nothing.
It looked more and more like Shumway was going to grant my business license. I thought the Elks Lodge incident had let him know the extent to which we were willing to go. I installed cameras around my house—and especially my backyard where Lazarus sometimes had to stay—just in case anyone decided to creep around again. But all had been quiet. I even called City Hall, where an assistant told me my license application was on the Community Development Director’s desk for approval. I was hopeful because it had made it that far, past fucking Shumway, who was still out sick after his mysterious food poisoning.
Closing up shop, I put the leash on Lazarus for the short walk to The High Dive. It really wasn’t necessary, but you never knew when that pervert Pratt would come rolling down the street on his fucking skateboard and Lazarus would jump up and flatten him. Not that I didn’t relish the thought. But I was a businessman now and had to be careful of lawsuits.
I was in a pretty elated mood until I got within a stone’s throw of the clubhouse and saw Pratt zooming away from it. “What the fuck?” I said to myself and Lazarus. We sped up our pace, banging in the swinging front doors.