“Huh. It looked like more than that.”
Madison shrugged, dropping the subject. Ty blocked for her as they fought the tide of remaining students flooding through the doors for the next class. Crossing the atrium, he started talking about the latest political battle on law review, but she could barely pay attention. Her hand was sweaty in her pocket, clutching her phone. She had to get rid of him and call Mom, to find out the latest in the saga of her troubled younger brother, Danny. A week earlier, Danny got swept up in a narcotics dragnet, arrested along with a dozen hard-core drug dealers from the old neighborhood, even though, as far as Madison knew, he wasn’t involved in anything remotely like that. Danny was now in federal custody awaiting trial. Nobody at school knew about it, not even Ty. Especially not Ty. He was a decent enough human being beneath his bravado that, if he found out she had family problems, he’d start asking questions that she didn’t want to answer. And probably end up getting the truth out of her, which she couldn’t afford. Appearances mattered too much here. You kept your game face on at all times. She didn’t want people finding out about Danny until she had a better handle on things.
“Pit stop,” she said, nodding toward the restrooms.
“I can wait. You want to grab a coffee or something?”
“Can’t. I have stuff to do.”
“All right. But hey, come out tomorrow? It’s my birthday. I’d love to see you.”
“Right. Chloe told me. I’ll be there.”
“She told you. Good. I’m glad,” he said.
From his tone, she could tell that inviting her had been a bone of contention. Chloe was Ty’s new girlfriend, and she kept a close eye on his interactions with Madison.
Ty left. Madison looked for a quiet place to make her call. But the atrium was buzzing with students coming and going. She caught snippets of conversation. Grades. Exams. Recruiting. Weekend plans. Mere days ago, her life had been that simple, that carefree. But the past, her family, her background always reared their ugly heads. They just wouldn’t let her go.
She made her way outside to the law quad. New England fall was winding down. There were still patches of vivid color in the trees, but you could smell winter in the sharp, cold wind. The forecast was for heavy rain later, which would suit her mood. She found a sheltered spot in the lee of the building and placed the call with shaking fingers. Her mother picked up on the first ring.
“Maddy, thank God. Where were you?”
“In class. What’s wrong?”
“Danny pled guilty.”
“How can that be? He swore to you he was innocent.”
“He still says that, and I believe him. I know it in my heart.”
“Why plead guilty if you’re not?”
“They made him.”
“Who made him?”
“I don’t know. He won’t say. It was, like, a thirty-second phone call from the jail, then he said he had to go and hung up. Maddy, he sounded scared.”
“Honestly, that doesn’t make sense. I studied criminal law, Mom. There are supposed to be negotiations for a plea. He was just arrested, what, a week ago? It’s too fast.”
“I thought so too.”
“What does his lawyer say?”
“I don’t know, and I don’t care. I don’t trust that guy. He’s the one who forced Danny to take the plea.”
“Forced him how?”
“What do you think? He threatened him.”
“That sounds like an excuse. Did Danny say that or is he—”
“Is he what? Making it up? You don’t believe your brother?”
“Don’t make this about me and him, okay? I’m just trying to understand the facts.”
“The facts are, this lawyer shows up in court. We didn’t hire him. And then he starts telling Danny what to do.”
“You not hiring him is not unusual. The court appoints lawyers for defendants who can’t afford them.”
“That’s not what happened. Something’s off, I’m telling you. He’s this old guy with dandruff who looks like he hits the bottle.”
“That doesn’t mean he’s not qualified.”
“Why are you taking the lawyer’s side? If you’d been in court, you’d understand what I’m talking about.”
“I already apologized for not being there. I told you, by the time I got your call that Danny had been arrested—”
“Right. I know how busy you are.”
The edge in her tone got Madison’s back up.
“I wasn’t too busy to come to my brother’s arraignment. My phone was off. If I knew, I would have dropped everything and—”
“Maddy, I don’t want to fight.”
“Then say you understand that I had my phone off. I can’t keep it on all the time on the off chance Danny gets arrested for drugs.”
Most people get to assume that won’t happen to their brother, she thought, but held her tongue. Danny had a long and checkered history for someone who was only twenty-one years old. Her mother didn’t understand how detrimental this was to Madison’s own plans, her future. How draining it was worrying about him all the time. But you couldn’t choose your family, and she loved him no matter what. He was her brother, after all.
“I don’t blame you, Maddy. Really.”
“I hope not. But thank you for saying that.”
“It’s a question of what we do now. We’re a family. Families stick together in tough times.”
Too bad that had not always been the case in her family. Their past was fraught, and never far enough from their present. Madison sighed, wishing things could be different. But they weren’t. She needed to suck it up and deal with reality.
“Tell me how I can help, Mom. You want me to call the lawyer and find out what happened?”
“No, I told you. That lawyer’s trouble. We need to go see your brother.”
“You mean visit him in prison?”
“Yes. Something’s wrong. I need to look him in the eye and get the truth.”
Would visiting get her name on a list? Her relationship to an indicted drug dealer could come out just as she applied for an internship with a federal judge. But what choice did she have? Danny was her brother, and he needed her right now, inconvenient as that was.
“Fine, I’ll go with you. I can do it Saturday.”
“No. Tomorrow morning, first thing.”
The prison was far away. It would be a long drive there, a long wait to get in, a long drive back. She’d miss her morning class, with finals coming up. Argh, what else was new? Danny’s problems had been screwing up her life since she was a kid.
“Please,” Mom said. “He’s in serious trouble this time, and I don’t know how to help him. I work in a nursing home. You’re a student at Harvard Law. I need your help.”
“Of course, Mom. Just tell me what time. I’ll be waiting outside my dorm.”
3
It was still dark out with freezing rain when the old Toyota pulled up in front of the dorm the next morning. Madison got in and pecked Mom on the cheek. She’d been up late reading for class, working on a moot court brief, and—most exciting—applying to the judicial internship in Conroy’s chambers. Her eyes were tired and scratchy, but her mother looked more exhausted than she felt. And older than she had just weeks ago, with new threads of silver in her hair and deep purple shadows under her eyes.
Danny’s fault, as usual.
“I got you a coffee,” Mom said.
There was a Dunkin’ sitting in the cup holder.
“Thanks.”
Madison took a sip and put it back down. Light and cloyingly sweet, the way she liked it when she was a kid. Her dad died when she was thirteen and Danny ten. Mom was frozen in that moment and still treated them like she did back then. Which meant indulging and enabling Danny. And expecting Madison to drop everything to take care of her little brother.
“Can you find this place in Google? The goddamn thing won’t talk.”