“You could have called me,” he snapped.
“What about the rebels, Robert? Are you willing to give up on them? What about the orphans?” She thought of the dozens of children she’d known over the years and had to brace against the swift slice of pain. “There are seventeen orphanages in this country. An untold number of children have lost their parents. How can I walk away?”
“Damn it, Lily—”
“There are over a million children in Rebelia,” she said breathlessly. “Dozens are dying every single day. None of them should be raised under such conditions. I love Jack with all my heart. I would die for him. But I can’t bring myself to leave when I know more of those children will die if I do.”
“You need to get your priorities straight,” he said.
“How dare you suggest that I wouldn’t put Jack first?”
As if sensing his mother’s distress, Jack began to fuss. Lily looked down at him. “Oh, honey, it’s okay. Shh…Mommy’s okay. She’s just…angry.” She frowned at Robert. “See what you’ve done?”
“I didn’t do anything,” he said defensively. But he’d come over to look at their son.
Shaking inside with the remnants of temper, she worked the straps of the carrier from her shoulders. “I know he can’t understand what we’re saying, but I’d appreciate it if you didn’t start arguments in front of him.”
“I didn’t start an argument,” Robert growled.
“He’s very perceptive.”
“He’s probably hungry or wet.”
Lily dipped her finger into his diaper and frowned. Damn it, she hated it when Robert was right.
“That’s what I thought,” he said.
Annoyed, she gently worked Jack from the carrier. Robert tugged a rolled up blanket from his backpack, walked over to a clearing a few feet away and spread the blanket on the winter grass. Jack was crying in earnest, so Lily held him close and carried him to the blanket where Robert knelt.
He reached for Jack. “Let me,” he said.
Keenly aware that this would be the first time he held his son, Lily pressed a kiss to Jack’s forehead and passed him to Robert. “If you want to change him, I’ll get the bottle.”
“Fine,” he grumbled. But his expression softened when he took his son into his arms. “Hey, big guy. How about if we lose the diaper for a moment? Sound like a good idea to you?”
Lily watched them covertly as she dug through her backpack for the bottle. The sight of father and son together in such an ordinary situation warmed her with unexpected emotion. She stared at them, her pulse quivering, her heart swelling against her ribs. Robert held Jack expertly, but she could tell he lacked experience. He might be a doctor, but there were some things that could only be learned by doing, and holding a baby was one of them.
He unfastened the diaper pins, rolled the soiled diaper into a tight ball and slipped it into a small plastic bag. Jack flailed his arms and giggled. “I thought you’d appreciate that,” Robert said.
The sight moved her a lot more than she wanted it to, certainly more than she wanted to admit. She’d dreamed of Robert holding his son but never really thought the moment would come.
“Aha gee!” Jack shouted and kicked his chubby legs.
Grinning, Robert looked at Lily. “That sounded like I’m hungry.”
Jack’s outburst hadn’t sounded even remotely like I’m hungry, of course, but the thought made her laugh.
Robert looked down just in time to see the tiny fountain spray upward. “Hey!” he said, twisting to get out of the way.
Lily dug into her diaper bag, quickly pulled out a fresh diaper and draped it over her son. “That always happens when I change him.”
Robert was busy checking his clothes for wet areas. He looked ruffled and, Lily thought, utterly adorable. Caught up in the moment, she chuckled.
“What’s so funny?” he grumbled good-naturedly.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you look so surprised.” She put her hand over her mouth to stifle a giggle.
“Yeah, well, who would have known he could aim like that.”
The laugh trapped inside her broke free. Shaking his head, Robert burst into laughter. Their laughter echoed through the silence of the forest. It was a foreign sound in a place that had been besieged with violence and hopelessness for the last two years. But it was like music to her ears, the sound of simple human joy, the sound of hope, of life and the promise of tomorrow.