Robert’s words jerked her from her reverie. Gathering the fragments of her composure, she tugged on the straps, praying he didn’t notice that the carrier was the last thing on her mind. “It’s comfortable.” She looked at Jack and smiled. “I think he likes it.”
Robert had spent most of the day making the carrier. He’d fashioned it from soft Rebelian wool, sewing on adjustable straps so that either of them could carry Jack in front at their abdomen or as a backpack. With six miles to cover before dawn, she figured she would be needing Robert’s help at some point.
A hundred yards from the cottage the forest seemed to swallow them. Towering pines blocked the dim light of dusk. The path tapered to a narrow trail. Lily was aware of Robert moving behind her. The steady tread of his hiking boots against the earth, strong and steady, just like the man. She found her rhythm and tried to concentrate on the trail, on making good time. But as much as she didn’t want to talk to him, her mind was reeling with all the things they needed to discuss. They were going to have to talk about how they were going to handle having a child.
The thought terrified her.
Almost as much as the thought of what it could cost them if Robert decided he wanted to be part of Jack’s life.
A tremor of fear moved through her when she thought of all the things that could happen. She knew Robert well enough to know he would want to have a role in his son’s life. He was a good man who would never turn away from such an important responsibility. He had every right to know Jack. To spend time with him and guide him and love him. Lily knew Robert would make a fabulous father one day.
Only in this case, it could get him killed.
“Which way?”
Lily started at the sound of Robert’s voice, then looked up to see that the trail had intersected an unpaved road. She didn’t like traveling on the open road, unused as it was, but she knew if she wanted to make it to Rajalla before morning they didn’t have a choice.
Next to her, Robert had removed a compass from his backpack. “Compass says we’re heading east.”
“We go right.”
“What’s to the left?”
“The road goes through a small village a few miles from here, then veers northwest into the mountains.”
“Toward the Veisweimar Castle?”
Lily tried to suppress the shiver, but didn’t quite manage. “Yes.”
Robert tugged a palm-size electronic gadget from his pack, opened the top and punched a few buttons.
“What’s that?” she asked.
“Global positioning system.” He cut her a look. “In case we get lost.”
“Yeah, and you’re here to inoculate children,” she said dryly.
Hefting his light pack, Robert started down the road. “At least the weather is cooperating.”
Lily glanced over at him, trying not to notice how good he looked in the Rebelian wool sweater she’d given him. It was old and a bit tattered, but the deep blue matched his eyes perfectly. At least he wouldn’t look out of place if the soldiers stopped them. They were traveling as a couple. Robert’s documents identified him as a French doctor working to inoculate Rebelian children against some of the diseases that had cropped up in the last couple of years. Diseases that had once been eradicated but had been revived by poverty and malnutrition and poor living conditions.
The story they’d decided on was that their son had gotten sick and they were taking him to the hospital in Rajalla. It was a good story—and true in part—but she hoped they wouldn’t have to put it to the test.
“There’s an old Rebelian saying,” she said after a moment.
Robert looked at her.
“Nothing changes quickly in Rebelia except the weather and the government.”
He smiled, and Lily’s heart gave a couple of hard taps against her rib cage. Mercy, she’d forgotten what his smile did to her. Robert Davidson had the kind of smile that would melt even the hardest of resolves.
“I don’t think we can avoid talking about our situation much longer,” he said after a moment.
She risked a look at him, dread twisting inside her because she knew what he would say next. She knew what he wanted. And she knew it was the one thing she could never allow.
“I’m not going to walk away from Jack,” he said.
“You’re not the only person involved, Robert.”
“This isn’t just about us anymore, Lily.”
“I know that—”
“I grew up without a father,” he cut in. “I don’t intend to let my son grow up the same way no matter how you feel about me.”
“Unless you plan to move to Rebelia permanently I don’t see how—”
“Surely you don’t plan to stay here.”
She didn’t respond.
“You have a child to raise,” he said. “This hellhole of a country is no place to raise a child, especially my son.”
“Don’t you think I know that?” she shot back.
“Evidently, you don’t or you would have gotten on a jet and hightailed it back to the United States a long time ago.”
She stopped in the center of the road, aware that her heart was pounding and that her temper was riding a fast second. “I would have been stopped at the airport or the border.”