“I used to look after my little brother sometimes. He was always getting into scrapes.”
Nick saw a glint of sadness that appeared briefly in Eve’s eyes. He hadn’t known she’d had a little brother. In fact, he’d never really asked her much at all about who she was or what she had lost. There were certain questions that everybody in the group seemed to avoid asking each other. The less they all thought about their old lives, the better.
He dipped his swollen fist beneath the water and used his other hand to pull Eve into a hug. He gave her a quick squeeze and kissed the top of her head. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I haven’t checked in with you much the last few days. Are you doing okay?”
Eve hugged him back. Then she broke away so that she could look him in the eyes. “I think we’re all doing about the same. Personally, I’m just feeling a little shell-shocked, like this is all just a dream or something. I mean, I can’t really be stuck up on a hill with a bunch of strangers, while monsters devour the earth, can I? That’s not real, is it?”
Nick looked down at his hand in the water and moved it around, creating soft swirls on the surface. “I guess the difference between nightmares and reality has become pretty thin recently.”
“You’re telling me. I keep expecting to wake up.”
“Me too. Every morning I wake up wishing that my wife is beside me. Then I remember everything that’s happened and I realise that I’ll never see her again. It takes everything I have just to face another day.”
“I know what you mean. I don’t know if I can keep doing it anymore. Not sure how much longer I can keep it up.”
“By getting up every morning and just getting on with it,” Nick said to her. He clenched his fist in the water and winced at the ensuing pain. “All of us left here are survivors. We’re all strong in our own ways. We just have to concentrate on doing what we can with whatever the day brings us. You stuck by me at the beginning. I don’t know if I would ever have made it this far without you. For that I’m grateful. I should have told you sooner. If you ever find that things are getting too much, then you come find me, because I owe you my life. I’m here for you, so just ask.”
Eve moved closer to him and looked up into his eyes. “Things are getting too much for me,” she whispered. “I need you to be here for me now.” She went to place her lips against his.
Nick moved away. He placed his hands out between them. “Eve, I’m married.”
Eve frowned in confusion. “You were married.”
The comment hurt Nick, even if it was technically true. To him, marriage wasn’t something that ended a few weeks after your spouse’s death. James and Deana were still in his heart, and while they were there, he was still committed to them.
Tears had appeared in Eve’s eyes and she struggled to look at him. “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “That was a really shitty thing to say.”
Nick shook it off. He didn’t want to let such a silly little thing come between them. “It’s okay. No harm done.”
Eve made herself look at him. “It’s just…It’s just that I’m so frightened and I feel…I feel so alone.”
Nick held her close. “You’re not alone, Eve.”
“I don’t want to lose you, Nick. You’re the only person that makes me feel safe. The only person I have any sort of bond with. I just want to hold onto that, because it’s the only thing that makes me feel like I still have anything human in my life.”
“I understand. But you don’t have to be with me in that way just to keep me close. We started this thing together. We’re friends and I care about you more than anyone here. When I dragged you out of that broom closet you became my responsibility, so don’t worry about me going anywhere. I’ll always have your back.” Eve’s face scrunched up and she started sobbing. Nick held her tightly in both arms. “I’ll keep you safe,” he said. “Don’t be afraid anymore, okay? Things are going to be alright, I promise.”