CHAPTER 42
Saint Paul, MN
Laney closed the bedroom door and leaned against it for a moment with her head bowed. Words sprinted through her mind, but none of them stayed long enough for her to catch. And she didn’t have the strength to focus on the task.
She pushed herself away from the door and walked to the bathroom. She placed her bag on the bathroom counter and started pulling out her shower supplies.
As she turned towards the shower, she caught her first glimpse of her reflection in the mirror. She stifled a scream, as her shampoo and soap dropped to the white tile floor. She stepped closer to the mirror and stared with morbid fascination at her reflection.
Dried blood was smeared across her hair, face, and neck. She reached down to touch her shoulder. Her shirt was stiff with blood. Half of her hair was caked with more blood and lay flat against her face. She looked like she’d stepped out of a horror movie. Although, she supposed, that wasn’t too far from the truth. She couldn’t tear her eyes from her image in the mirror.
Giving herself a mental shake, she turned on the shower, making the water as hot as possible. She stripped off her clothes and dumped them in the garbage. She didn’t want any of them.
Climbing into the shower, she scrubbed her skin and hair until she was raw. Then she stood there, letting the water beat down on her. She had killed a man. She pictured the fight in her mind, cringing with every swipe of her knife. My god, she had killed him without any thought. She had just reacted. Who was she becoming?
Her skin now bruised and pruned, she turned off the shower. Climbing out, she inspected herself in the mirror. All the blood was gone, but she still felt like it was there.
“Out, damned spot,” she whispered, feeling a connection with Shakespeare’s doomed lady.
She grabbed a hotel robe and wrapped it around herself. And then she went still. She reached out a trembling hand to hold onto the wall. Fear, sadness, terror boiled up inside her, clawing their way up her throat.
Her breathing came in jagged bursts. Turning, she slid down the wall. Pulling her legs to her chin, she wrapped her arms around them. Her chest heaved and sobs burst from her.