CHAPTER 11
Matthew Watkins “All one word” should be spelled…Oh, never mind. This joke is stupid.
Finn Is God Considering taking freelance job titling potential porn movies. Working on title involving “Oh, Susannah,” and “Pie for Me.” Thoughts?
Julie Seagle Attempting to perfect tricky Boston accent, but currently sound more like Robin Williams than Matt Damon. Dammit. Success is elusive.
Julie leaned against the counter and looked up at Java Genius’s chalkboard menu. “I need a type of icy, frothy, coffee-chocolate concoction,” she said leadingly.
The guy behind the counter crossed his arms. “Do you mean a Frappuccino?”
Julie clicked her tongue. “Close. A little less powerful. Something more like…I don’t know….”
He sighed. “A Dunkin’ Donuts Coolatta?”
“Bingo!”
The barista set his forearms on the counter and leaned in to Julie, smiling. “We have a Mocha Heatbuster that I think you’ll like. Anything for your friend? Or friends?” The coffee guy pointed to the couch by the window, where Celeste sat upright on a couch with Flat Finn standing next to her, facing the open room. At least nobody else was here for now, and Flat Finn could easily pass as some sort of garish advertisement for vitamin-enhanced water should other people show up.
“Yes, two smoothies. A mango yogurt for him and a chocolate banana for her,” Julie said, straight-faced.
He looked into Julie’s eyes, his own glistening as he tried not to smile. “Will that be it?”
“For now. One of us may need another drink in a bit. In fact, one of us may really need a drink in a bit. Those two are a lot to handle, but we’ll try to keep it down.”
“I’m used to it. We get all types in here. This is Cambridge, after all.”
Julie watched as he made their drinks. He had nice arms, and she involuntarily lowered her gaze when he turned around. Oh, my. He had a lot of nice parts. The styled black hair and green eyes didn’t hurt either.
She reached inside her purse, but he stopped her and tipped his head toward Flat Finn. “Don’t worry about it. Your special guest entitles you to free beverages.”
Julie flinched. Goddamn Flat Finn was making for a perfectly weird flirty exchange. “Thank you, um…?”
“Seth.”
“Seth. Thank you, Seth. I’m Julie.” She cleared her throat and tried to come up with an excuse as to why she was out for coffee with a flat boy. Telling him that a thirteen-year-old girl needed to cart around a flat version of her brother for a mysterious reason probably wouldn’t fly. “I’m doing an experiment for my psych class. Recording people’s reactions to the presence of a life-sized cardboard cutout in various situations.”
“Sure you are.” He stepped back and held his hands out to the side. “In that case, how am I doing? C’mon, what’s the assessment? Am I passing?”
Julie tucked her hair behind her ears and tried to look serious. “It’s not a question of doing well or poorly. It’s just an objective collection of data.” She picked up her drink and couldn’t help grinning. “But you’re doing well so far.”
“I’m relieved,” Seth said. “Do you want help carrying those drinks? That guy you came with doesn’t look very helpful. Chivalry is dead these days, I guess.”
“He has his moments. Now doesn’t seem to be one of them. And he’s not actually my guest.”
“So does this mean there’s any chance you’re single?”
She winked at him. “I think it’s too soon for you to ask me that.”
“Fair enough.”
Celeste was poised stiffly on the end of a purple velvet couch, a bustle of leaves from a potted ficus tree dangling just above her head. Seth set the chocolate banana drink on the coffee table in front of her and held the mango smoothie out. “What should I—”
“Just put that one down,” Julie advised.
“OK. Hi,” he said as he held his hand out to Celeste. “I’m Seth.”
Celeste was breathing audibly, but she took his hand. “Celeste.”
“Mind if I sit down?”
Celeste sized him up. “I think that decision is up to Julie. You are interested in her romantically, correct?” she said robotically.
“I think it’s too soon for you to ask me that,” he said. It was his turn to wink at Julie. “But yes, I am.”
“Let’s let him stay. I’m sure he’ll have another customer any minute, and then we can talk about him behind his back.” Julie sat down next to Celeste and tried her drink. “As blended coffee beverages go, this one is not bad.”
“Maybe you’ll be a regular customer then?” Seth dropped into the cushy armchair in front of them. “Maybe all of you will? I would not complain if two beautiful women with a non-threatening guest wanted to stop in every day.”
Julie pretended to pout. “Celeste, I think he’s hitting on you.”
Celeste blushed nearly scarlet red and hurriedly reached for her drink. The pins in her hair had held up, and with the decent outfit on, she not only looked her age, but also looked especially pretty. “Julie,” she scolded softly, but the tone of her voice had lightened. She couldn’t hide her obvious enjoyment at being complimented.
Seth laughed and slouched over, resting his arms on his legs. “Ah, if I were only a few years younger, then definitely. As it is, I’ll have to settle for shamelessly hitting on Julie. What do you think, Celeste? Do you think she’ll go out with me?”
Normal color had returned to Celeste’s cheeks, and she looked seriously at him. “How old are you?”
“Nineteen.”
“Do you work here full-time?”
“I’m a sophomore at BU. I work here a few afternoons a week and sometimes weekends. I’m majoring in political studies,” Seth said, accepting that an interrogation had begun.
Celeste began firing off questions. “Where do you live?” “Do you have misbehaved roommates?” “Do you have any pets? Do you have any misbehaved pets?” “Are you a good driver?” and on and on.
Seth, to his credit, answered every question thoroughly and respectfully. He lived in one of the dorm rooms and had one roommate, who was a transfer student from Nebraska and so far had not proven to be misbehaved. No pets, as the college wouldn’t allow it, but one day Seth would like to have a potbellied pig. He had only had one speeding ticket (forty in a thirty-mile-an-hour zone), and he had paid the ticket promptly and had never had a car accident. “No accidents in Boston is a big deal, so I want extra credit for that.”
“Noted,” Celeste said.
“OK, that’s plenty.” Julie cut off the line of questioning. She couldn’t help noting the irony of Celeste assessing anyone’s emotional stability. “I think we’ve determined that Seth is not a psychotic nut.”
“He doesn’t seem to be,” Celeste agreed. “I think you should go out with him.”
Seth clapped his hands together. “Yeah? OK, I have one vote for yes. I just need one more…one more! What’s it gonna be? What’s it gonna be?”
“Sure, why not?” Julie agreed.
“Yes!” He threw his hands up in victory. “Friday night? Seven o’clock?”
“OK,” she said.
“This is going to be a real date, I assume?” Celeste asked. “You are not going to take her to a tawdry, rambunctious college party, are you?”
“No. Definitely not. I promise I will take Julie somewhere nice. Dinner and then something else respectable to be determined.” The front door swung open, and a flood of customers came in. “I have to go take care of them, but can I call you?” Seth pulled his cell from his pocket and programmed in Julie’s number. “I’m glad you both came in today. You two are much cuter than the stuffy English professor and her mother who were here before you. Julie? I’ll talk to you soon.” He returned to his job behind the counter.
Huh. Julie had a date. She smiled and put her feet up on the table. Seth was probably going to want an explanation regarding Flat Finn, but he seemed nice, and she could picture him tolerating Celeste’s issues. Julie still wasn’t quite clear on the scope of Flat Finn’s purpose. Well, at least he was an attractive enough cardboard brother.
“We could come here and do homework together in the afternoons. It’s pretty quiet here,” Julie suggested.
“It is something to consider.” Celeste rose and examined the paperback books that sat on a shelf. “Do you think you will fall in love with Seth?”
“I have no idea. I’ve known him for twenty minutes. That’s not something you know immediately. At least I don’t think so.”
“You said that you didn’t want ordinary. How do you know that he is not ordinary? Maybe he will turn out to be dull and uninspiring. Or worse, maybe he will make you adore him and then suddenly disappear and break your heart.”
“Nice positive attitude you have,” Julie said, frowning. “Those are all possibilities, but I think I’ll give him a chance anyway. It’s worth the risk.”
“I do not know about that.”
Julie sunk further into the cushy couch. “I’m no expert. What the hell do I understand about boyfriends and love anyway? The only way I’m going to learn is by trying.”
“I think that is valiant of you. Fearless.” Celeste took a book of short stories from the collection and sat back down to read. “I find it a good sign that they have reading material here. This is an inviting atmosphere.”
Julie pulled out her phone and checked her mail. “Hey, Finn wrote to us. With pictures.”
Celeste leaned over excitedly and stared at the screen. “What did he say? Quick! Where is he now?”
“It seems he’s on the scuba-diving leg of his trip. Look.” Julie angled the screen so Celeste could see the photos of Finn dressed in a full wet suit, snorkel, mask, and air tank. He was saluting the camera in one and falling off a boat in another. The third was taken underwater, and he was surrounded by a school of fish.
Dear Celeste and Julie
In a rush right now, so you both get the same message. Deal with it! You can now refer to me as Scuba Man. My new name entitles me to superhero status, so I expect both of you to give me the appropriate respect. My skills include cutting myself on barnacles, swimming at an Olympic pace to evade sharks, and collecting sand in uncomfortable places in my wet suit. Don’t be jealous; not everyone can be as powerful as I am. Future powers to be determined.
–Finn
Celeste beamed. “Isn’t Finn funny? I love him.”
“Does he ever call the house so you can talk to him?” Julie asked.
“No. Absolutely not,” Celeste said sharply. “I asked him not to. It makes it easier for me. I would rather just wait to speak with him in person.”
“I can understand that. And at least you have all these messages and pictures, right?”
The door opened again, and more people came in. Celeste tightened her hold on the book in her hand. “I would like to go home now,” she said. “I need to go home. Right now. Right. Now.”
“Sure. If that’s what you want.” Julie stood up and went to lift Flat Finn.
“I will do it,” Celeste hissed. “I will do it.”
“A couple of contractions here and there wouldn’t kill you,” Julie muttered.
She took their drinks while Celeste moved rigidly, picking up Flat Finn with her usual awkwardness. Julie walked ahead, past two teen boys seated with two girls at a table near the exit, calling out their orders to a friend in line. Her heart sank. They must be the reason for the sudden need to leave. Julie cringed as she held the door open and watched Celeste march stoically past them, careful not to look their way. There was a small hope that the teens had conjured up a sane explanation for Flat Finn’s presence. The advantage of being in a major city was that there were weird things to see anywhere. For all she knew, there were cardboard boys riding the T and auditing classes at Harvard. But one of the boys looked at the cardboard Finn and tapped the girl on his left to show her. She turned her head and giggled, her eyes wide and mocking.
Celeste brushed past Julie, onto the sidewalk.
They go to school with Celeste. Julie could tell.
She turned toward Seth at the counter and waved. “Thanks for letting us borrow your display for our theater performance,” she said loudly. “We’ll return it in good condition!”
Seth looked quizzically at Julie and then nodded slowly. “Yeah. Sure thing. Don’t damage it, or you won’t get your deposit back.”
Julie shut the door and caught up with Celeste. “Do you know them? Those kids?”
Celeste shrugged.
“You know them, don’t you?” Julie unlocked the car and took Flat Finn from Celeste.
“Perhaps,” she answered sharply. Celeste got into the passenger seat and slammed the door.
Julie gently positioned Flat Finn and shut the trunk. She walked slowly to the front of the car, trying to figure out what to say.
Celeste clasped her hands together. “I have to start a history paper today, so we need to get home.”
“We’re going.” The engine rolled over noisily. God, did anyone take this car in for regular maintenance?
“I have yet to determine which topic I will be doing, so we need to get home right now.”
“Jesus, Celeste, we’re going!”
Celeste scowled and retrieved Julie’s iPod from her bag. She put the earphones in and turned away.
Julie smiled. Well, that was damned normal.