Your Perfect Life

“I don’t know how far we’ll go,” she said quietly, but I could hear the smile in her voice. I froze as I realized she was talking about Chris McNies and the formal. Shit. This is what I was afraid of.

“No!” she giggled. “I wouldn’t let him do that!” I sent a silent prayer that she was talking about kissing her or something else first base like that. I had never really thought of Audrey as sexual, something that Rachel seemed to be constantly worried about with her. My heartbeat quickened and sweat began to trickle down my forehead, because after listening to just a snippet of the conversation, I could now understand why. I tried to slow my breath and stand as quietly as possible as I leaned in to hear the conversation more clearly. “I’ve heard that about him,” she said, before quickly adding, “but I’m sure it’s just a rumor. I’ll be fine.”

What has she heard? That he moves quickly? That he dumps girls who don’t give him a blow job? That he expects sex if he buys you dinner? My mind raced and I ran my hand through my hair in an attempt to calm down. Don’t freak out. This is Audrey. Not you. I flash back to my high school prom. It’s not the same thing, Casey. Get a grip. And suddenly all my suspicions break free.

“Mom, is that you?” I heard Audrey call out and realized that I must have made a noise. I quickly swept down the hall, trying to forget what I’d heard and the reason it had affected me so much.

? ? ?

A knock on the bedroom door jars me out of my thoughts and I walk over and open it gently, careful not to reveal Audrey. “She’ll be down in a minute,” I say to John, who’s been nervous all day. “Get the camera ready!”

Audrey glides to the top of the staircase a few minutes later and my heart swells with pride as she maneuvers expertly in her stilettos. Rachel wraps her arm around mine and I squeeze it to let her know I realize how hard this must be for her. To watch her little girl grow up, and all the things that go along with it. That she’s probably terrified that Audrey might make the same mistakes she did. Maybe she’s even questioning settling down with the first real boyfriend she had and hopes Audrey won’t tether herself the same way. I know she’s also thinking of what happened to me on my prom night.

I look down and catch John’s eyes filling with tears. Even Sophie is smiling brightly as she bounces Charlotte on her hip, in complete awe of Audrey’s transformation from shy girl to gorgeous young woman. I motion to John to take pictures as she floats down the stairs, her eyes on her handsome date standing at the bottom of the stairs, a ruby-red wrist corsage in his hand and that smirk on his face. I shoot a look at Rachel—did she see it too? Or was I just being overly paranoid because of my own experience? Rachel seems oblivious; she’s focused solely on Audrey.

“You look incredible,” Chris murmurs, his eyes hungry, his hand confidently wrapped around her tiny waist as they pose for pictures. My stomach begins to ache and I fight the urge to wedge myself in between them.

A few minutes later, they’re ready to leave, and I pull Audrey aside to the kitchen, Rachel giving me a knowing look. I’d promised her that I’d talk to her before they left. Not as if she had to ask me twice; I’d been a mess since Chris walked in. “What, Mom?” Audrey asks, annoyed that I’d tear her away from her Prince Charming.

“I just wanted to tell you to be careful tonight.”

She rolls her eyes. “I know, Mom, we’ve had this talk, like, a thousand times this week. I get it. No drinking, no drugs, no sex.”

“Listen, honey,” I say, desperate to get through to her after seeing Chris undress her with his eyes. “I trust you. Just listen to your gut. If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. Okay?” I plead with her. “I just don’t want anything to happen that you’ll regret for the rest of your life,” I add under my breath, wishing that someone had said the same words to the teenage me.

“Okay. I promise,” she says as she begins to walk away, before turning back around and giving me one last hug. “I love you,” she whispers in my ear.

“I love you too,” I whisper back, blinking back tears.

We wave good-bye from the door and watch through the window as Chris helps her into the waiting limousine and I squeeze John’s hand tightly as they disappear from view.

Liz Fenton , Lisa Steinke's books