Wildest Dreams

chapter 35

Luke studied his son and Ramona, seeing the love and fire in their eyes. "Nathan is right, you know, about what other people will say, Tyler. You know how people around here feel about the Sioux. They understand why Nathan would marry an Indian woman, but you—"

"I've heard it all, Pa. I just want you and Mother to be happy for me, to give us your blessing, and allow us a Christian wedding. For all we know, Ramona could already be carrying my child."

"Tyler!" Lettie could hardly believe what had happened between Ty and Ramona while they had been gone.

Ty's face reddened with a mixture of embarrassment and anger. "Mother, I am twenty years old. Ramona is eighteen. We're old enough to know what we want."

Luke studied Ramona. No, she was certainly no little girl. She was a ravishing beauty with a beguiling way about her. What red-blooded twenty-year-old wouldn't be attracted to a wild, fetching thing like her? Alice Richards was also beautiful, but Ty didn't have to be around her every day, and she didn't have the sultry ways of Ramona. He sighed, leaning forward in his chair and rubbing at his eyes. This was not a situation he would have wanted to come home to, but there was no getting around it. Tyler had cornered them almost the minute they arrived, and they had all gathered in the parlor. Nathan paced at one end of the room like a nervous cat.

"I'm more upset by the fact that you and Nathan fought than I am about you wanting to marry Ramona," Luke said, his voice sounding weary.

Ty and Nathan looked at each other, each knowing the other could tell Luke the worst of it, which would only upset him even more. They both respected him too much to do that to him.

Lettie's heart ached for Luke. He had been good enough to accept Nathan back, Indian family and all, had always cared about him because he was her son. It hurt to realize what a problem all of it was causing, and she felt partially responsible. Neither of them had given a thought to Tyler becoming attracted to Ramona, and now she wondered how they could have been so foolish. "Luke, if they have already—" She felt her own face flushing. "If they have already... been together... there really is no choice here."

"I know." Luke's hands were still over his face. He thought quietly for a moment, then looked up at Ty and Ramona, who stood together in front of him. "I want you to understand, Ramona, that I don't look at you or Leena as any less important human beings than anyone else. I'm not an Indian-hater. Because of Nathan we've all grown to understand the Indian situation a lot better, and I can't say I can blame your people for fighting to keep what they consider their land. God knows I've done enough fighting and killing for the same reason." He moved his gaze to Tyler. "The only reason I'm not completely in favor of this is because no matter how you feel about Nathan, he is right. This won't be easy for you, Ty, so you make damn sure it's what you want. If you love Ramona as much as you say you do, you don't want her to be hurt. And there will be children to consider. They'll be half-breeds, and some people look on that as worse than being Indian. They'll be my grandchildren, so no one will dare insult them in my presense, but I can't be everyplace at once, Ty."

"I'll protect and defend Ramona and my children against any man!"

Luke rose, shaking his head, wondering how many more fistfights his son would get into over his wife. In his youth, Ty simply did not understand what he was getting himself into. He turned and faced all of them. "I don't consider myself any better than the next man, but you do understand what this means, don't you?"

Tyler frowned. "I'm not sure what you're getting at."

"What I'm getting at is that Pearl has married a fancy man who will never want anything to do with the Double L. Robbie is off studying to be a doctor, so if and when he does come back here, he'll always live in town and will also not have anything to do with the Double L. That leaves you and Katie and Nathan. Nathan is married to an Indian woman, you want to marry an Indian woman, and Katie is married to a sheep man. Are you starting to get my point?"

Tyler could not help a little grin. "Someday sheep men and Indians and half-breeds will be running the Double L."

"The very kinds of people I've been chasing off for years."

"Pa, I love the Double L. Any children I have will love it as much as I, and someday maybe one or two of Katie's children will also want to help run this ranch. The important thing is that it's in the hands of family, people who love it, and who love and respect the man who built it. I've learned a lot about how to run the ranch, and I'll teach my children the same. The Double L will be all right. I would never let anything happen to it. You must know that. Besides, times are changing. Sheep men and cattlemen get along well now, and the Indian wars are over."

Luke met his gaze squarely. "What about Alice Richards? Do you intend just to throw her away? She's been a good friend to you for years, more than a friend; and I don't doubt she's been waiting for you to settle down and get more serious."

Ramona looked down, burning with jealousy over the pretty white girl she knew was fond of Ty.

"Alice knows there is something going on. I'll talk to her. I don't take her friendship lightly, Pa, but I don't love her the way I love Ramona."

Luke shook his head. "Well, considering what has already been going on between you two, I guess your own decision has already been made." He looked at Nathan. "I don't have any choice but to give them my permission, Nathan. If I send Ramona to the Cheyenne reservation, I'll only alienate my own son, and I won't do that. I just hope letting them marry doesn't mean alienating you."

Nathan approached them, his lower lip still a little blue, the cut scabbed into a red line. It had been a week since his fight with Tyler, and he had not spoken to him since. "I do not blame you for your decision," he told Luke. "You are not the one who has a choice. Tyler is your son, and I would not expect you to go against him. It is Tyler who has the choice. I think he has made a bad choice, but it is done now. He must marry her the Christian way to make an honorable woman out of Ramona in the white man's eyes. I just do not want to see her hurt."

"None of us wants that, Nathan," Lettie put in. "But you should know by how much we love you and your family and little Luke and Julie that whoever Tyler marries, we will love and defend her as our own." Her heart warmed at the loving look he gave her, something she had once thought she might never see.

"My mother is a woman of great compassion," Nathan answered. "I do not fear how you will accept Ramona." He turned to look at Tyler. "You have said that I am not Indian. This is true. But I was raised with Ramona, and I love her like a sister, even though we are not of the same blood. You and I are of the same blood, but the bad feelings continue. I told you once before that I did not come here to take anything from you. Now I give something to you. I give you Ramona." He turned and walked out.

Luke turned to Lettie. "I'd like a few minutes alone with Ty."

Lettie took hold of Ramona's arm. "Come with me, Ramona. We need to talk about your wedding. I'll have Gino make a gown for you. You'll be such a beautiful bride!"

Ramona looked sadly at Tyler before leaving the room with Lettie. Was everyone right? Would it be such a difficult thing being married to a rich white man? She looked around the room of the elegant Fontaine home. What did she know about living like this? Lettie Fontaine was so educated and refined. She was the kind of woman it took to run a place like the Double L. Tyler's parents were good people. They would love her as their own daughter if she married Tyler. Was Nathan right that Tyler would ultimately be much happier married to someone like Alice? She had much to think about, for above all else, she loved Tyler Fontaine more than she loved herself.

"I want no more fighting between you and Nathan," Luke said sternly. He walked over to close the parlor doors, then turned to face Tyler.

"I just don't like his arrogant attitude," Ty answered, "as if he were better than the rest of us."

"Maybe he thinks the same way about you," Luke answered. "Maybe he thinks you consider yourself better." He walked to a stand at the side of the room to pour himself a small glass of wine. "You've been pretty damn hard on him, Ty, and for no good reason. Family is a pretty important gift. I want you always to remember that."

"I know that, Pa. You know how much I love you and Mother and everybody."

"Everybody but Nathan."

Tyler sighed deeply. "Pa, I don't worry about being treated fairly. I know you better than that. It's just that he's always been some sort of mystical being in Mother's eyes, like there's something more special about him. And he didn't come back here out of any love for you or Mother. He came back so he and his family would have a place to live, nothing more. All those years he never gave a damn about you and Mother or the rest of us."

"He wasn't raised to give a damn. He had to learn it at an older age. He had to come here and see for himself. I don't blame him for any of it, Ty. He was just a little four-year-old boy when he was stolen away. You have no idea how that would have affected you if you were the one stolen." He sipped some of the wine. "As far as Nathan not really being Indian, of course he isn't. But he feels like one on the inside, and you have to respect that, just as he has to respect who you are and your importance here on the Double L. You have to understand how he feels about Ramona. He has seen the other side, Ty. You haven't. He's been a part of two worlds. He knows how hard this will be for Ramona. You think that just because she'll be a Fontaine, she'll be protected, but it doesn't always work that way. I don't want to see you or Ramona hurt."

Luke set down the wine and paced, while Tyler stood silently, waiting for the man to finish. "We both know she's just as beautiful and good and worthy as any other woman," Luke finally continued, "but how we feel doesn't change the prejudice that's out there waiting to lash out. Some terrible things have happened, Ty, on both sides. Don't forget the Little Big Horn. Maybe you were too young to remember or care that much about it, but people our age haven't forgotten. It doesn't matter anymore whose fault it was or how right the Sioux and Cheyenne might have been. All that matters is what people remember, and they remember what happened to James Woodward and his family. I would never dream of keeping you from the woman you love. I would only lose you. I just want you to be sure about this, and if you truly love Ramona, are you really doing what is best for her happiness?"

Ty met his eyes, looking ready to cry. "Pa, I'd die without her."

Luke put a hand on his shoulder. "All right. Then marry her. But I want no more hard feelings between you and Nathan. Sit down, Ty. I want to tell you about something that happened to me in St. Louis, between me and my own brother."

"You saw your brother? How about our grandpa? It's hard to believe they've always been too busy to come here."

"I haven't told you the whole truth of it, Ty." Luke walked to the fireplace and Tyler sat down, listening intently as Luke spilled out his story, surprising Ty with the intense emotion he displayed in the telling. He hadn't even had a chance yet to unwrap the pictures of his mother and father that he had brought home with him. "Now maybe you understand better why I could never turn Nathan out, Ty," he finished. "I know how it feels to think you aren't loved or wanted. When I married your mother, I vowed to love Nathan the same as the rest of my children and never let him feel like an outcast. His being stolen away by Indians didn't change any of that."

Tyler watched the man lovingly, hardly able to believe how Luke had been treated by his own father. "I'm sorry, Pa, about what happened to you. I guess I understand a lot of things better."

"The point is, John readily offered me my share of the business, without question, even though I can't prove I'm a Fontaine. I don't need any of it, and I told him so, but I appreciate the fact that he offered. In the same way, Nathan has a right to a part of this ranch, whether you like it or not. He doesn't want it any more than I want to take anything from my own brother now. What matters is that my brother understood, just as I expect you to understand it's the same situation for Nathan. He needs our love and acceptance, Ty, even though he pretends it doesn't matter to him, and I need you to help me in this, not work against me. Nathan has given you Ramona, and to this day he has never asked for one thing but a place to live. He has become a damn good ranch hand, and you know how good he is with horses. He has given a hundred percent on his part, and he and your mother have grown closer. That means the world to Lettie. I want us to be a close family, Ty. We always have been until these hard feelings between you and Nathan. I want it to end."

Tyler rose, walking close to his father. "I guess... I guess I was afraid I'd somehow lose you, lose that kind of special thing we have."

Yes, Luke thought. It was nameless, but special, this feeling for his firstborn son, so special that poor Robbie had felt it, yet he loved Robbie and the rest of his children just as fiercely. Perhaps none of them would understand these feelings until they had children of their own. "That can never change, Ty. Never. Deep in your heart you have to know that."

Tyler smiled, and Luke felt as though he were looking into a mirror, except that the lines of age were not there. "I do, Pa," he answered.

Luke nodded. "What I've told you about my own father is just between you and me, Ty. I want the rest of the children to think only good things about him and my mother." Luke had not told Tyler the truth about Nathan's own real father. He had made a vow not to. It was enough that the children knew the young man was a half brother. It was important that he be accepted fully. Why taint the children's view of him or their mother, and why hurt Nathan, by telling any of them the truth? They had been told over the years that there were no pictures of Nathan's father because they had been burned in the raid. Only Katie knew the truth, and she was a wise woman, had always been very mature for her years. She knew firsthand how her mother felt and why it was important to keep the secret.

"I'd like to meet my uncle someday," Tyler said, interrupting Luke's thoughts.

"You may get the chance. He's going to visit. I don't know how soon, but I believe he'll come, maybe next summer."

Ty took a deep breath, smiling. "Maybe Ramona and I will have a child of our own by then."

Luke prayed the marriage would be as happy as Ty thought it could be. "Maybe. I just wish you had waited for a real wedding, Ty."

"Pa, I've been watching her and loving her for a year now. One day I followed her to the pond up at the northeast corner, and she..." He reddened. "She was swimming." He turned away. "I don't know. It just... happened. There she was, inviting me to come and swim with her. We both knew what we felt right then and there." He turned to meet Luke's eyes boldly. "She's not a loose woman, Pa. She was... I was her first. She said no matter what happened afterward, that's how she wanted it. I love her, and I want her to be my wife. We'll be okay."

Luke put a hand on his shoulder. "I think maybe you will at that. God bless you both, Ty. You know Lettie will love her as she does her own daughters."

Ty nodded. "Mother is a hell of a woman."

Luke held up his wineglass. "I'll drink to that." He finished the wine. "Why don't we go talk to Nathan? We need to straighten out a few things."

Tyler forced back the old resentments. "Sure. Why not?"

They left the house, and from the window of Katie's old room upstairs, Ramona watched Ty and his father walk out of the house and toward the barn. She worried over some of the things that had been said, but she kept her thoughts to herself. How could she talk to a white woman like Lettie about how an Indian woman felt about living this way, her fears and apprehension over marrying someone like Ty? Even now Lettie was going through some of Katie's old dresses to determine Ramona's proper sizing. She had Ramona try some of them on, but each fancy dress felt foreign and uncomfortable to Ramona. For these past three weeks she had shared her love with Tyler on her terms, rolling in the grass by the pond, wearing simple dresses and often no shoes when she was home with Nathan. It had not struck her until she came into the house with Ty just how white he really was, or how rich, or how he belonged with someone more like his own mother. What did she know about the proper undergarments and stockings, the proper way to wear her hair or a hat, how to take care of such a big house? Lettie was so kind, but no matter how much she taught her, or how fancy were the clothes she might wear into town to attend church and the women's socials Lettie was telling her about, she would always be Morning Sun, a Sioux Indian.

"Ramona, try this one! I think it might fit," Lettie was telling her. "You can come with me to the women's club meeting in two days and I will announce your engagement to Tyler. This dress will look beautiful on you."

Ramona turned to see her holding out a lovely lavender-colored dress with wide ruffles that spilled down the full skirt. She stepped over to let Lettie put it over her head, and she winced at the feel of the tight corset Lettie had laced her into. She hated the way white women dressed. She felt as if she couldn't breathe.



"Luke, You'd Better get out here. Ty and Nathan are about to go at each other's throats."

A plate of partly eaten steak and eggs sat in front of Luke. He looked up at Billy Sacks, who stood in the doorway to the dining room. "I'm sorry to bother you, but you'd better come."

"Oh, dear," Lettie fretted. "Now what? I thought we solved everything last night."

Luke scowled as he rose, walking on long strides out of the house. Lettie put down her own fork and hurried out behind him. What could have happened? Tyler had been so happy at the breakfast table. He had finished before them, wanting to go out and check on a lame horse. He was going to ride to Nathan's house then and see Ramona for a few minutes before starting his chores. Lettie hurried behind Luke, and she could already hear the shouting down by the barn. Luke started running, and she ran behind him. Nathan was standing and facing Tyler calmly, but two men were holding back Tyler, who was trying to get at Nathan with his fists.

"It's your fault, damn you!" Tyler was screaming. "Why did you have to come here? Why did you even bring Ramona in the first place if she was promised to a damn Indian! I hate you! I hate you, Nathan Fontaine! You don't even deserve the name Fontaine! You're White Bear! You're Sioux, remember? What the hell are you doing here, you bastard?"

Lettie's heart sank at the words. How much worse would it be for Nathan and Ty both if they knew the truth about Nathan's father? What had happened to cause this?

Luke stepped up and grabbed Tyler by the shirtfront. "What the hell is going on here? Just last night—"

"She's gone, Pa! Ramona is gone! She's out there alone somewhere, and it's his fault! He must have said something to scare her away from me!" Tyler's eyes were wet, his face red with rage, the veins in his throat taut from straining and screaming.

"Calm down, or I'll hit you myself!" Luke ordered Tyler. He looked at the men holding him. "Let go of him."

"Whatever you say, Boss." They released Tyler, and he stood there panting, glaring at his father. "Get rid of him, Pa. Get rid of him, or I'll kill him!"

Luke jerked on his shirt. "You'll do no such thing! I won't have this happening in my family!"

"Then he shouldn't have made Ramona run away!"

Luke let go of him, but kept a close eye on him. "The rest of you men get the hell out of here and get to work!"

The others wandered away, mumbling among themselves and shaking their heads. Luke realized some of them had no idea what was going on between Ty and Ramona, and he also knew what the opinions of some would be. He could not concern himself with that now. He turned to Nathan. "What the hell happened?"

A deep hurt showed in Nathan's eyes. "Ramona ran away. She left a note. I did not know what she was planning. Sometime in the night she must have come out here to get Star and she rode off. The note was left in Star's stall." He looked over at Lettie pleadingly, then back at Luke. "I swear I said nothing to discourage her. Last night I shared wine with you and Tyler. I had given my consent. I would not have gone back on my word."

"You liar!" Tyler shouted. "You talked her out of it. Somehow you scared her away!"

"I love her!" Nathan shouted back. "Would I want my own sister riding out there alone and in danger? Why would I do such a thing?"

"You'd do anything to keep her from marrying me!"

"Don't be stupid, Ty!" Luke answered. "Nathan wouldn't have wanted her to run off alone. The important thing is to figure out why she did it and for us to go after her."

Tyler tore a piece of paper from his pants pocket and handed it over, still glaring at Nathan, a tear slipping down his cheek. Luke read the note, written as well as Ramona could write, given her limited education. "'It is best this way,'" Luke read aloud. "'I love you, Tyler Fontaine.'" She had spelled Fontaine wrong, but he ignored it. "'I love you enough to do what is right for you, even though it breaks my heart. You belong here. I do not. Our happiness could not last forever. I am going back to my people where I belong. I will marry Standing Horse.'"

Ty glanced at his mother. "Did you say something to her? What did you do when you took her upstairs?"

Lettie felt as though someone had pierced her heart with a knife. "Oh, Ty, how can you think I would ever do anything to hurt someone you love?"

He looked away, clenching his fists.

"What did you do?" Nathan asked Lettie.

Lettie put a hand to her stomach. "Well, I... I was as good to her as I could be. I helped her try on some of Katie's dresses. She was going to go with me to the women's club meeting in a couple of days. We had a good time trying clothes on, fixing her hair."

Nathan smiled rather bitterly, shaking his head. "You are a good woman, Mother, but I think perhaps it was too much at once—all those fancy clothes, being in that house, seeing how you live."

"And I'll just bet you pointed all of that out to her when you got her back to your house!" Tyler yelled at Nathan. "My mother would never deliberately discourage her, but you would, you son of a bitch! You knew she'd get just enough of a taste of being a Fontaine to scare her, and you played on those feelings!"

A terrible sadness showed in Nathan's eyes. "I said nothing to her last night. When she came home she was very quiet. I asked her what was wrong, and she just looked at me and said she did not want to talk about it. She just wanted to go to bed and think and be alone. I even offered to come and get you, but she said that I should not."

"That was all the more reason to come and get me!"

"Both of you get mounted up," Luke ordered. "We're going to try to find her. She probably tried to follow the same roads and trails that brought her here. She most likely headed north before she would go east, so that she wouldn't have to ride anyplace near Billings."

"I can track her," Nathan said. "I know the gait of her horse, and Star has one hoof that looks slightly crooked."

"Let's go, then." Luke grabbed Tyler's arm to lead him into the barn, but Tyler hesitated, glaring at Nathan.

"She rode out of here in the night. Do you know how dangerous this country is at night?"

"Of course I know how dangerous it is! I have lived in the open country most of my life!"

"If anything has happened to her—"

"You will blame me!" Nathan said, sneering. "But at the same time, I will blame you, Tyler! None of this would have happened if you could have kept your pants buttoned until your father got home! You had no right making big promises to her! You had no right taking liberties with her!"

Tyler charged for him again, but Luke grabbed him, holding on for dear life. "Stop it, Ty!" he growled. "Or do you plan to punch your own father! That's what you'll have to do before I'll let you light into your brother again!"

Tyler relaxed again, jerking away from Luke. "Don't call him my brother." He turned and walked into the barn, and Luke looked at Lettie, seeing the devastation in her eyes. He just shook his head and followed Tyler into the barn. Nathan looked at his mother then.

"I swear I said nothing to make her do this," he said, agony in his voice. "I did not mean to make so much trouble for you. When we find Ramona, we will leave the Double L."

Lettie shook her head. "Please don't, Nathan. Don't go away again."

He hated to see the pain in her eyes. "I might have no choice. If it comes down to choosing between two sons, you know which one Luke would choose, no matter how much he loves me. He loves Tyler the most, and I do not blame him for it. Perhaps we will find Ramona and everything will be all right."

Tears slowly trickled down her cheeks. "Perhaps," she whispered.