Under the Open Sky

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Amanda watched her father gain strength as Cadey-Lynn gained mobility; first rolling herself over to smile brilliantly at anyone who would take notice. Then scooting, her long skinny legs pushing her off the edge of her blanket as little hands reached for items Amanda didn’t see until they were on their way to a curious mouth.

“The bug doesn’t taste good does it?” Amanda asked of her daughter as wiped her mouth free of bug. “Yuck, Cadey-Lynn.”

Cadey-Lynn shook her head and tried to avoid her mother’s hands.

“She’s as stubborn as you ever thought of being,” Sterling accused.

“I don’t doubt it,” Amanda placed her daughter back on the blanket.

“She’s growing fast,” Sterling noted.

“Yes, she is,” Amanda smiled and grabbed Cadey-Lynn’s favorite stuffed animal to place it next to her daughter. “Dr. Connors seems pleased with your progress,” Amanda commented.

“It’s slower than I would like.”

“Daddy, you had a stroke; you don’t just bounce back from that,” Amanda informed her father.

“I need to be running my ranch,” he growled.

“Trent does very well because you taught him well.”

“He’s stubborn and hot headed,” Sterling accused.

“Well, now, I wonder where he got that from?” Amanda demanded. Her father’s words were barely slurred now; Amanda felt relief every time he spoke.

“Girl, you are twice as sassy as your mother ever thought of being,” Sterling shot at her.

“It comes from living with two stubborn, hot headed mules,” Amanda claimed and watched a smile tug at her father’s mouth, though he was trying to stop it.

“Cadey-Lynn, what do you have now,” Amanda scooped her daughter off the blanket. “I swear child, you have microscopic vision. I keep thinking she’s going to take off crawling at the rate she’s going.”

“She does seem to want to be mobile,” her father agreed.

“Hey, Mandy, Naomi and I are back if you need to get going,” Trent offered. He and Naomi had gone for groceries. They were no longer sitting with Sterling around the clock, but they weren’t leaving him all alone either.

“Thanks, Trent; you have a date tonight?” she asked as she started gathering Cadey-Lynn’s things. Trent entered the room to scoop his niece up before he answered.

“Yes,” he then turned his attention to Cadey-Lynn. “Hey beautiful, are you Uncle Trent’s girl?” Trent lifted her shirt and blew raspberries on Cadey-Lynn’s tummy. Cadey-Lynn’s laughter peeled through the house.

Amanda was folding Cadey-Lynn’s blanket and smiling at her brother.

“When are you going to start dating, Mandy?” her brother queried.

“There’s only one man I’m interested in dating,” Amanda reached for her daughter.

“Come on, Mandy; are you going to spend the rest of your life alone?”

“I can if I choose to,” Amanda grabbed Cadey-Lynn’s bag and left the house; she didn’t bother to say goodbye. She felt tears sting her eyes. It had been over a year since Cade left, she should be past this by now.

Amanda decided she had to get away, just for a little while and started packing Cadey-Lynn’s diaper bag. After loading enough that it felt as though she were moving, Amanda placed Cadey-Lynn in her car seat and drove to the mall in Haddon. She found herself wandering aimlessly around the mall with no real interest in shopping.

When she found herself watching a tall dark handsome cowboy she shook her head. He bore just enough resemblance to Cade to make her heart clench. Based on the way he kept glancing back at Amanda, he probably thought she was flirting. Amanda stood and grabbed the handles of Cadey-Lynn’s stroller. Cadey-Lynn had plenty of clothes, as did she; there really was no reason to be here.

“What are we going to do with our selves Miss. Cadey-Lynn? We can’t sit in the house the rest of our lives,” Amanda asked her daughter as she fastened her back into the Jeep. Back at the ranch she walked down to the barn and flipped the lights on.

“Hi, Dandelion, we don’t see as much of each other do we?” Amanda rubbed her horse with her free hand. Dandelion stepped closer and nudged Amanda lightly. Cadey-Lynn squealed in delight and reached for the horse. To Dandelion’s credit, she tolerated it well.

“Gentle, Cadey-Lynn,” Amanda flattened her daughter’s hand and rubbed it up and down Dandelion’s nose. Amanda walked around the barn telling her daughter all about horses, though she knew it meant little to her daughter.

“I have a lot of fond memories in this barn, Sweet Pea. Your daddy kissed me for the very first time in this barn. Well, I kissed him first, but he kissed me back. I knew I was in trouble then,” Amanda rambled. She finally closed up the barn and returned to the cabin and bathed her daughter for bed. After her daughter was down, Amanda turned the TV on and allowed herself to get lost in the plot of a movie.

The flash of headlights told her someone was there before footsteps sounded on the porch and Amanda stood to open the door as Jenny came up the steps.

“Hey, Jenny,” Amanda stepped back to let her friend in. It was nearly one in the morning; what was she doing here?

“Hi,” Jenny’s expression was an odd mixture of elation and hurt.

“What’s up, Jenny?” Amanda reseated herself on the couch as her friend paced the room.

“I slept with your brother,” she finally blurted.

“Okay, not a complete shock,” Amanda returned. “Are you disappointed? You don’t look altogether happy about this.”

“No, I’m not disappointed; I’m a little angry at him and I need you to tell me I am being unreasonable,” Jenny informed her as she finally settled into a chair.

“Perhaps you should tell me the problem first,” Amanda suggested. “Did he pressure you into it, did he hurt you?”

“No! Nothing like that. I was a very willing partner and he was…he didn’t hurt me.”

“Okay, so why are you upset?”

“He actually implied that he was surprised that I was a virgin!” Jenny came out of her seat. “What does he think I slept with every guy I dated? I thought he was teasing when he suggested I was a bad influence on you! If he thinks I’m that kind of girl why is he with me? Am I a nice distraction until somebody better comes along?” Jenny was pacing the floor again.

“I’m sure he didn’t mean it that way,” Amanda assured her friend. And if he had Amanda would kill him. When she presented the judge with the tally sheet of offenses that had finally driven her over the edge she was sure she would be acquitted. Still, for all of her brother’s short comings she couldn’t imagine her brother using Jenny that way.

“If he insulted you why did you sleep with him?”

“He waited until I was lying with my head on his chest thinking how nice it had been to go and make a comment like that! Then he says he has to be up early and he has to go and I’m left sitting in bed wondering if I just handed him something that meant nothing to him,” Jenny was starting to cry now.

“What did he say exactly?” Amanda demanded to know.

“’After the way you came on to me I wasn’t sure you were a virgin.’ What is that supposed to mean? I was trying to decide if I should be upset when he kissed me and said he had to go. I felt so brushed off,” Jenny sank onto a chair.

“He has to be in Missoula tomorrow morning, if that makes you feel any better.”

“I’m not sure it does.”

“Jenny, Trent has never been good at communication. He says stuff without thinking about how it sounds.”

“Cade seemed to communicate with you just fine,” Jenny sniffed.

“When he communicated. Most the time I was left wondering what he was thinking. He communicated more with me in letters than he ever actually said to me. I’m sure Trent wasn’t trying to brush you off, Jenny.”

“It felt that way.”

Amanda sighed. She didn’t know what to say.

“I’ll be right back,” Amanda excused herself. She topped the stairs and went her room to call her brother. Jenny was going to be pissed at her but the only way Jenny would get answers was to ask questions. She checked in on her daughter and returned downstairs.

“Where’d you go?” Jenny demanded.

“To check on Cadey-Lynn. I wish I knew what to say, Jenny.”

“You think I’m being paranoid?”

“I don’t know,” Amanda admitted.

She heard her brother’s boots on the porch and watched Jenny panic.

“Amanda!”

“What’s wrong, Mandy?” her brother was frowning as he entered. She watched his gaze land on Jenny’s tear stained face.

“Jenny, what’s wrong?” Trent was across the room in a moment.

Jenny wouldn’t look at him.

“What is it sweetheart?” Trent took her by her arms. His voice was low when he spoke, “If you didn’t want to…”

“It’s not that,” Jenny cut him off.

Amanda moved up the stairs to give the couple privacy. She moved into her daughter’s room, pulled the covers back over her, and leaned over to kiss her daughter’s head as she inhaled the baby smell of her. Amanda crossed the upstairs landing to her room, her thoughts straying to how close to the surface her own emotions and nerves had been the night Cade finally made love to her. She smiled; she had been a basket case too.

A short time later, Jenny topped the stairs and moved into Amanda’s room to plop onto the bed.

“All better?” Amanda queried.

Jenny laughed and nodded. “I feel like an idiot.”

“So you aren’t a casual fling?”

“No. Apparently,” Jenny paused her cheeks staining red, “he rather expected I would be but when I was so bold,” Jenny stopped unable to finish the sentence.

Amanda smiled. “Who called who brazen?” she teased.

“You threw yourself at Cade,” Jenny accused. “More than once!”

“I did,” Amanda acknowledged, “but when he finally took me up on it I was shaking like a leaf and nervous beyond belief; almost scared.”

“You were?” Jenny looked shocked. “I was a little nervous but not too bad; I certainly wasn’t scared.”

“See, you’re bolder than I am.”

“It was a bigger deal than I thought it would be,” Jenny admitted as she fiddled with the hem of her jeans. “You know what I mean?” her hazel eyes were intense when they met Amanda’s.

“I know,” Amanda nodded understanding.