The Do Over

Madison and I resumed our daily training. According to her, I still had a great deal to learn. Apparently, ordering her around was on the list of things that needed to be dealt with immediately. The truth was that I liked telling her what to do, and secretly, I thought she liked it, too. She could try to remedy it all she wanted, but it wasn't going to change.

I also took on the role of Madison p-ssy Protector. There was no way some motherf*cker was going to get close to her if I was around. So, I was around as often and as much as I could be. After I had Daniela where she needed to be, which was on my f*cking dick, I was going to subject Madison to the Rick Marin School of Maddy Reform.

Madison's training was proving to be beneficial in all areas of my life. The guys were back to playing basketball on Thursdays. We played fiercely on the court, and Liam was no longer the only wonder boy shooting hoops. The odds were evening out. In fact, they were stacking in my direction. He wouldn't know what hit him, and I didn't give a shit. Daniela was mine before she knew him, and by the look of her trembling lip, she still was. She just needed to be reminded.

As I walked into the locker room, I saw Chris. "Hey, Chris," I said, "before I forget, Madison wanted me to give you these. It's for her yoga class." I pulled out the certificates that Madison had given me as part of Operation Escalation.

My goal was to win Daniela back before New Year's. I'd decided that Madison needed to intervene. There was no better way to do that than to have Daniela and Madison hang out. I owed Maddy my left nut and maybe the right one, too.

"Dude, I don't do yoga. That's for chicks," Chris said flatly, looking at me like I'd grown a vagina.

Chris was unreal. I stared him down, shaking my head.

"No, you idiot, it's a class for women. Maddy, um…Madison wanted me to give them to you for your girlfriend and her friends."

"Maddy?" Chris chuckled. "What's going on with you and Maddy Stuart? The last time I asked, you changed the subject. You've been spending a lot of time with her lately."

"We're friends," I said impassively.

I really hated when Chris moved from shithead to motherf*cker. By his tone and expression, he had done the transition in the blink of an eye.

"Madison Stuart doesn't do friends, and neither do you, unless benefits come with them." Chris smirked.

His assumption couldn't be further from the truth. Although I even questioned it at times, we were, in fact, just friends.

"So, is she as good as they say?" he asked.

Anger surged as I pictured that a*shole Alex, Chris, and a plethora of other men who eyed her like a f*cking meal. I was consumed and ready to f*cking kick his ass. My blood boiled, and my jaw clenched.

Madison had come through for me. I could count on her for just about anything. This a*shole wasn't going to talk shit about her. That was exclusively my job.

"F*ck you, Chris." I got in his face. "She's my friend, so f*cking watch what you say before I kick the shit out of you."

Chris got back in my face and glared at me. "What the f*ck's your problem? Why are you so defensive? Madison's no angel, and she'll be the first one to tell you. Shit, you saw right through her the minute you met her. She sure as hell doesn't need you to protect her virtue when she's giving it away to anyone with a dick."

The tension in the room escalated.

"Chris, stop it," Liam said sternly, staring at him.

Shit. I didn't need or want Liam to fight my f*cking battle.

Chris was speaking the gospel truth. Madison liked to f*ck. I'd called her while she was f*cking. I'd watched her walk away with a f*ck buddy. I'd f*cking hated it, but what was I supposed to do? I couldn't blame her. I loved f*cking, too. I was waiting for Daniela to get with the program, so I could finally f*ck again. Shit, I miss f*cking. Personally, I detested that Madison whored herself around, but she was a consenting adult. I knew she deserved a lot better, but Chris was no one to be talking shit about her. Who the f*ck does he think he is?

I didn't acknowledge Liam. He had no business getting involved in this.

"Don't f*cking talk about Madison like that." Closing in on Chris, I clenched my fists. I felt a fierce sense of loyalty and a need to protect her.

Chris shook his head. "So, you aren't f*cking her, but you don't want me to talk about what every other guy who does f*ck her talks about—her sweet p-ssy. What's the deal? You're no f*cking saint."

He was oblivious to the ass kicking that was coming his way.

Liam got between us, holding me back. "Chris, that's enough. Stop being an a*shole," he said, making sure Chris understood.

Chris looked over to Liam. "Dude, relax. I'll back off." As he turned back to me, he sincerely said, "It's just weird. I don't know why you're so f*cking pissed off." He was clearly dumbfounded by my reaction.

I took a step back and started pacing. As I opened and closed my fists, I shook the tension out of my arms and head, stretching my neck from side to side. I was confused myself. I had never lost control or gotten physical. I was a lover, not a fighter.

"You know what? I don't know what the f*ck came over me," I said to Chris.

I felt possessed by a powerful force. She wasn't even here, and she was still f*cking pissing me off. Why the hell does she have to be such a motherf*cking whore? I remembered her saying that it was her turn to forget. What the f*ck is that all about?

I had been close to beating the shit out of Chris because he'd called her out for what she was. I had nothing to lose by explaining my relationship with Madison. Maybe they could shed some insight as to why she f*cking pissed me off all the time.

"Madison's giving me advice on how to get my girl back. You know, she's helping me understand women," I admitted.

Chris was tying his shoe when he looked up at me. Shaking his head, he asked, "And how's that shit working for you?"

"To be honest with you, she's brilliant." Nodding, I sat down on the bench next to him. "But, most of the time, I think she's trying to f*cking cut off my dick."

Liam stood there, tossing a basketball between his hands.

"Between you and Lucas, I feel like I'm watching one of those birth-control commercials. F*ck. The two of you need to grow some balls." After the words flowed effortlessly out of his mouth, he guarded his face when Liam turned and aimed the ball at him.

Liam shook his head in disbelief. "Chris, you're really a piece of work. Why on earth does Macy put up with you?"

Chris smiled and wiggled his eyebrows. "Per her admission, she's addicted to this right here." He grabbed his dick. "See, I'm a f*cking man." Chris threw a towel at me. "Rick, you're asking a chick for help to get another chick. How are you not worried that you're going to grow a vagina? You are the man, dude. Talk to us, and we'll make sure that your manhood stays intact."

After my masculinity was challenged, We went for drinks, and so began my education with the first pitcher, the second pitcher, and then the third, or maybe it was the fourth. Who knows? We lost count.

Liam looked at us, shaking his head. He leaned in toward me. As though he was sharing the secret of life, he said, "You need to love her more than you love your dick."

"Dude, you're drunk," Chris slurred.

"That's really deep, but what the f*ck does that mean?" I asked, confused.

Liam was being a f*cking philosopher, and I'd gladly take practical tips from the a*shole who was f*cking Daniela. He obviously knew what worked with her.

"You have to love her more than you love your dick," he said in a tone that seemed to be making an obvious point.

I was lost. That sounded like the same bullshit he said earlier.

"You're not f*cking Dani?" Chris's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "I thought you took care of the condition."

"F*ck you." Liam shook his head and then finished his beer. "I don't need this shit. I have someone waiting for me at home."

"Yoda, wait. I need you to impart your wisdom." I needed him to keep talking. I had to understand. "Speak in English, dude. No offense, but you're talking in chick."

Chris just nodded in agreement as he stared at his beer with his eyes glazed over.

"You two are a lost cause. Let me dumb this down for you." Liam rolled his eyes. "She has to matter to you more than your dick does. Bottom line is that f*cking doesn't create a lasting relationship. Don't get me wrong. It's a great part of the relationship. I love it. I can't get enough of it, but it's not everything. Talk about something other than you, like things that interest her. You have to get to know your woman—her likes and dislikes. Dani talks about her friends and her books. I know when I have to turn off the TV and give her all my attention. And when she wraps her arms around me and smiles, I know there's no other place on earth I want to be. The take-home message is for you to stop being a selfish cocksucker."

"Hold on a second. I don't suck cock. I eat p-ssy, and damn, I'm starved for some right now." I took another drink and brought my glass down hard, causing a little beer to splash out. I needed them to both understand. I was after p-ssy not cock.

Chris spit beer out of his mouth. "Rick, bro, when was the last time you got laid?"

"It's been too long. So, yeah, I think I might just love this girl more than my dick. My dick's f*cking pissed off at me right now. Do you know that I f*cking pushed Lise off of me while she had her p-ssy in my face and my dick in her mouth?"

Their eyes nearly popped out of their heads as their mouths dropped to the table. I deserved a trophy. Lise was a hot model with a smoking body.

"I can see you haven't been listening to me at all. Dude, stop thinking with your f*cking dick. You need to love her more than you love your dick. Trust me, it's a wonderful thing," Liam said.

I stared at him. He sounded like he had been shot up with estrogen.

"Does this lecture come with a PowerPoint presentation?" Chris asked before he buried his drunken head in his arms.

"F*ck you, Chris. I can stop," Liam said, shrugging his shoulders. He pushed his glass away.

"Shut up, Chris. This is good. Continue." I motioned with my hands for Liam to go on. This was valuable information.

"Your dick is secondary to her heart. It's plain and simple." Liam pulled out his phone. "These are pictures of my girl. She's beautiful. Look at that million-dollar smile. The first time I saw her, I acted like a horny teenager. F*ck, I wanted her. I could have buried my dick in her in front of an entire CPR class. She turns me on like nobody else, but I didn't push it because she mattered more than my dick." He sat up and looked me straight in the eye. "When you find the one, you'll love her more than you love your dick. It's not about you. It's all about her."

Chris looked over at Liam. "Dude, is she the one?"

"Think so," Liam responded, nodding his head, while he looked at his f*cking phone.

What a p-ssy.

I didn't want to hear about how much he wanted her, or how she turned him on, or that she was the one. A part of me wanted to tell him how much I'd once turned her on, how she had moaned when I'd touched her, and the way her body had reacted to my f*cking voice. Then, I'd tell him that she wasn't the one for him because she was going to be mine again. But I didn't say anything because I was becoming a better man, or a worse one, for participating in this discussion.

I was f*cking plastered, so I called Madison to pick me up. I overheard Liam calling Daniela for a ride. She would be there in a matter of minutes.

"Hey, Dani's coming to get me. Do you need a ride?" Liam asked.

F*ck. Why does he have to be such a decent guy?

"Nah, that's okay. Madison's on her way," I said. I got up to go to the bathroom and hide out until Madison arrived.

"Oh yeah, about those yoga classes. Dani would really love that. See? This'll win me points because I know her and I know what she likes."

When Liam held out his hand for the certificates, I actually felt sorry for him.

"Take this for whatever it's worth. Your friend is more than a friend. You don't go up against your brother over a chick unless she's under your skin, and if you aren't sleeping with her, then you've got it bad."

"It's not like that. We're really just friends. Sure, I care about her, but no, I hate her most of the time," I said.

I texted Maddy to see when she'd be here to pick me up. He was wrong. He must sense that something was up, and he was just trying to throw me off Daniela's trail.

"Just make sure the one you're chasing is worth letting this one go." He patted me on the shoulder before he made his way out.

Daniela was worth everything, and Madison was just my friend. She always would be, so I wouldn't be giving up anything.

When the coast was clear, I came back out and had another drink. It had been a long time since I was buzzed and couldn't remember when I'd been drunk. I sat in the back and waited, and waited, and waited some more. Forty-five minutes later, Madison walked in, turning heads. I watched the show from my table. There was a reason why she could get f*cked by just about anyone she wanted. Madison wasn't just gorgeous. She looked f*cking lickable. She strutted over to me with her brow raised in contempt. She was annoyed.

"Marin," she said in a sultry voice, leaning into my face. "You owe me big time."

I couldn't help loving when she did sexy-badass shit like that.

Wearing a huge smile on my face, I followed behind her with my hands on her hips. "Did I interrupt something?" I'd almost gotten into a fight over her damn p-ssy, so I hoped I'd ruined her booty call.

She turned, hissing at me. "Rick, I told you to cut back on your alcohol. I didn't tell you to get wasted."

When she pushed open the door, the cool night air sobered me just a tiny bit.

"You need to stop being a f*cking cockblocker. I'm more upset about that because I'm horny, and now, I have to rely on my goddamn vibrator."

I pulled her in close to me and wrapped my arms around her waist. My body pressed into hers as she leaned into mine. I nuzzled my face in her neck. Damn. She always smelled so f*cking good.

I breathed warmly into her ear. "Do you know how hot you are when you get pissed off at me?"

I ran my lips over her neck. She tasted as good as I'd imagined. She tilted her head to the side, wanting more.

"Tonight, when you're f*cking your vibrator, call me. I want to hear you come." I smacked her ass and got in the car.

She settled into the driver's seat. "You're an a*shole," she said, her eyes shooting daggers at me.

I reached for her hand, brought it up to my mouth, and grazed it with my lips. "Thank you, Maddy. You're my best friend. I owe you big time. Whatever you want, it's yours."

I leaned my head back on the headrest, and then I napped until she pulled up to my apartment. She woke me up, pushed me out of the car without a good-bye, and then watched me walk into my building.

I knew I was going to have one f*cking hangover tomorrow.





The twinkling lights on the Christmas tree glowed in the darkened living room. The scent of the balsam fir tree filled the air. The holidays were fast upon us, and before I knew it, Christmas was only a couple of days away.

I curled up under a blanket with a cup of hot tea and my Kindle. I'd been going to a yoga class where I'd met my new friend, Madison. She happened to be a health guru and my latest project. She'd been helping me eliminate my diet soda consumption, thus the cup of tea instead of my preferred twenty-ounce bottle of diet soda, and I was trying to crack her outer shell. She was much more successful than I was.

I hadn't done yoga in the longest time, and I missed it. It was weird how Rick and I'd just talked about it, and then Liam had come home with a gift certificate for a class. I took it as a sign to get back into balance. The timing was actually great. With Candace off in Jacksonville and Macy on probation, I needed someone to bond with. Liam was my best friend, and I did bring my problems to him, maybe a little too often. He was so good and patient with me, but he was a man. I needed someone to listen to me vent. I needed someone who could work through my issues with me, as nonsensical as some of them were, without telling me how to fix them. Part of the process was the journey, not always the destination. Liam didn't understand that, and I was perfectly content having him as my man and not my girlfriend.

Madison was great. She was a combination of Macy's sluttyness with a little bit of Candace's badass attitude without the prim and proper part. I could live with that. The best part was that she wasn't associated with my past or my present, so I could talk to her without worrying that she would judge me. After all, I quickly learned that she would be the last person to throw a stone.

Madison and I became close pals. After yoga, we started talking about health and fitness. The next thing I knew, we were throwing back shots of wheatgrass with mango-juice chasers at the smoothie store across the street. I cringed at the memory of the first shot.

I eyed the shot glass filled with the swamp green liquid suspiciously. I glanced over at Madison as she raised her glass and brought it up to her mouth. I wasn't one to back down from a challenge. Somehow, this felt like an initiation of some sort.

I picked up my shot glass and downed the wheatgrass. My face puckered at the taste. "That was the most disgusting thing I've ever consumed in my life. Gross."

"You get used to it." Madison drank a double shot and then slammed the glass on the counter. "If you start eating clean and cut out all the processed junk out of your diet, you'll see a considerable difference. After a while, you'll start craving wheatgrass juice."

"I'm not sure about that. Wheatgrass tastes like ass. Right now, my body's craving an ice-cold diet soda." I shrugged my shoulders and laughed. "But this yoga class is perfect. I can do it before I go to work, especially since Liam's usually up and out by this time."

Madison ordered us green smoothies. She told me to trust her, and I had no reason not to. We grabbed a small table by the window.

As we raised our glasses, she toasted, "To good health."

The green concoction was pretty good.

She sipped on her smoothie. "So, who's Liam?"

I put my drink down and broke into a wide smile. "Liam is everything." Warmth filled me, and my cheeks blushed softly. "You might think I'm a nut. It's nothing personal, but you don't strike me as the romantic type. I am though. I read romance novels, too. I love them, but it drives my friends crazy." With a giddy shimmy, I pulled out my phone to show her my Liam album. "This is the man who makes my heart skip a beat." I almost went into a more graphic expression taken from my vast literary arsenal to explain the feelings that Liam elicited from me. Somehow, I didn't think she would appreciate the burning loins and hitched breaths descriptions, so I kept it clean.

I handed her my phone, and she flipped through the pictures. I beamed. I was in love, and part of being in love was to annoy the crap out of other people. Although her lips curved into a soft smile, her eyes were downcast. I knew that expression. I'd worn it for too long after my own heartbreak. It was difficult looking at someone else so in love. I assumed her heart was shattered.

She handed the phone back to me. "The two of you look very happy. Good for you."

After that day, I'd started going to yoga three times a week. After the second week, Madison and I had gotten into the routine of throwing back wheatgrass shots after yoga. We basically talked about health and nutrition. All attempts to discuss her personal life were shot down. It became my mission to help her. If nothing else, she clearly needed a friend.

Now, I sipped on the organic chai tea that Madison had introduced me to. It hit the spot, and I barely missed my diet soda. I giggled, remembering how I had thrown Françoise a curveball when I'd declined the diet soda he had waiting for me at Van Dyke's. I'd asked him to replace it with a cup of hot water and a selection of teas.

I opened my Kindle to read, but the lights on the Christmas tree were distracting me. While Liam was working tonight, I sat on his couch in his T-shirt under his blanket. The more I loved him, the more the risks from his job unnerved me. I stayed here to feel close to him and to somehow will him to stay safe. He loved having me in his bed, and he took great pleasure in showing me just how much. I took over half his closet, most of his bathroom, and a couple of drawers. I barely slept in my townhouse, except on Thursday nights when he played basketball. Technically, I hadn't moved in, but this felt like home to me.

The lights caught on one of the ornaments, casting an image on the wall. It wasn't anything specific, just a play on lights and glass, but it reminded me of something Madison had said.

We just finished an intense yoga class, so we were crossing the street to the juice bar for our traditional after-class drinks. Madison was an interesting person. She had never brought up my relationship again. I felt bad for her. She lived behind a huge wall. She was closed off and in desperate need of the sisterhood.

I'd talked to Liam about it. He'd told me not to go near that subject with a ten-foot pole. He'd said that they had to figure things out on their own. Of course, that had been all the encouragement I'd needed.

After throwing back our shots, we sipped on our green smoothies.

"Please don't ask me to give you my food journal. I've been eating clean and doing my exercise and yoga." I laughed. "Geez, I sound like Rick." When that slipped out, I momentarily froze.

Madison's eyes shot up from her drink. "Rick?" she asked. "Have you been holding out on me?"

"Do you believe people can change?"

I hadn't planned on it, but this gave me an opportunity to talk about something personal with her. Maybe I could find out about that tower she hid behind and learn something about the he in the "they" Liam had referred to.

"I think people can evolve. If they mature through the process, they're open to becoming a better person, but at the end of the day, we are who we are. Why do you ask?" She started playing with her hands, looking at her nails, as she laced and unlaced her fingers.

"Tit for tat." My eyes danced with amusement. "I told you about Liam and dropped Rick's name." I leaned forward, resting my chin on my hands. "Now, it's your turn."

"My turn for what? I don't do the girlfriend-sharing thing, but because I like you, I'll give you this much. I don't do the boyfriend thing either, so there's nothing to tell. You can tell me about Rick if you want to or not." Her expression was blank, and her wall was sky high. "It makes no difference to me…unless there's trouble in paradise. Then, I might be willing to throw you a bone." Madison rested in her chair, seeming up for the challenge.

I tilted my head to the side. "Tit for tat, dear. You told me nothing. It's your turn."

Her gaze was steady, and her face was devoid of emotion. "Love is an illusion. We see what we want to see until the reflection changes." She subtly shrugged her shoulders. "At least, that's been my experience. It's fragile like a house of cards. Anything can knock it down, and then all you have is a mess. I'd rather control my environment. Human contact is essential. Sex is a wonderful thing, so I have it on my terms. No strings, no attachments, and no illusions." The corner of her mouth pulled up into a smile. "Who's Rick?" Madison asked, her tone cool and smooth.

I sat back in my chair. I had wanted to welcome her into the sisterhood. Instead, this felt like a challenge and a battle of wills. There was something more at stake, and I was going to find out what it was. "Rick's my ex."

We stared each other down in an almost adversarial way.

"I loved him, but he broke my heart. I didn't let anyone in until I met Liam, and then we fell in love. Love is real. It conquers all and lasts a lifetime." I sat up. "Who is he?"

"There is no he," she said impassively.

I raised my eyebrow in suspicion.

"Oh, my cockblocker?"

"Cockblocker? This should be very interesting." I smiled, nodding.

Now, we were getting somewhere. I was right about one thing. Madison was not a romantic. Her views on love and her reference to the man that was clearly under her skin was just hardened and bitter.

"He's just a temporary inconvenience. He's a project that's coming to an end, which is a good thing since I haven't had sex in almost a month." She tilted her head to the side. "Are you in love with Rick?"

I was startled by her question. "You're lying. He's not an inconvenience to you." My heart rate picked up as a flicker of anxiety coursed through me. "I told you that I'm in love with Liam. To answer your question, although I hated Rick for a long time, a part of me might always love him. When I'm with him now, he's the man I knew he could be, not the one that broke my heart. It's very innocent, like chaperoned teenagers walking along Lincoln Road." I tilted my head, matching her posture. "For someone who has sex on her terms, I find it fascinating that you'd let a man cockblock you. I know denial, and you're in it."

She shrugged her shoulders. "Yes, you seem to be an expert at denial. Do what you have to do. Like I said, love is just an illusion. Be careful. Now, let's focus on what's important. How's your nutrition?"

With that accusation, I stirred uneasily in my chair. What does she mean?

Unfortunately, she changed the subject to health and fitness, effectively dismissing my attempts to revisit her comment. Madison clearly didn't understand the social graces of the sisterhood. She was like a stray cat that needed to be domesticated and declawed, and I was up for the challenge.

I stood up to see which ornament was guilty of the light show on the wall. I admired the beautiful tree.

Poor Liam. I had him go to three different lots before I'd settled on the perfect tree. He always spoiled me. I was sure he had thought all the trees looked the same, but never once had he complained or made me think that I was being silly. After we had gotten home and put up the tree, I'd made sure to show him my utmost gratitude.

A smile warmed my heart as I thought back on that day. There's the culprit. It was a silver-framed ornament with a picture of Liam and me for our first Christmas together. Liam wasn't an illusion. What we had was real.

My phone chirped.



Macy: What are you doing?



Dani: Reading.



Macy: Boring. I'm coming over.



Dani: Reading a good book.



Macy: Almost there.



Dani: Ignoring you.



Macy: Christmas gift crisis.



Dani: Procrastinating?



Macy: Open the door.



I held the door open as Macy blew in like a Tasmanian devil.

"I'm not really procrastinating. I'm just not sure if I should get Chris a gift or not. We haven't talked about exchanging gifts. We aren't official, and I just don't know what I should do. Should I just get him something and keep the receipt? If he doesn't get me anything, then I can just return it. If he does get me something, then I can avoid the awkward moment by having a gift for him. So, what do you think I should get him?" Macy tossed her purse on the counter and plopped her butt on the couch. "It's dark in here. You should turn on a light." She eyed me up and down, acknowledging me for the first time. "Awww, look at you wearing Liam's T-shirt. How cute."

"Sure, come in, no problem. I'm just the door holder." I closed the door and flipped on the light on my way back to the couch. "The room was illuminated by the Christmas tree. It's romantic." I crossed my legs and pulled the blanket over me. "I have no idea what you should get Chris as the just-in-case gift. He needs to shit or get off the pot. And, just so you know, I told Liam," I huffed.

Macy gave me a double take as her mouth dropped open. "That's worse than when I told Chris about your condition. I can't believe you. I'm putting you on probation." She threw her arm over her face. "So, what did Liam say?" she asked with curiosity.

"It's not the same thing. Liam said he wasn't getting involved and that it's between the two of you, so I should mind my own business. I tried to educate him. I told him that as my BFF, he needed to understand the code of the sisterhood. Of course, I need to intervene. He and I wouldn't be together if you and Candace didn't force me to go to Breathe. He failed to see the similarity."

Sensing Macy's need for some therapy, I got up and pulled out a bottle of wine. After filling our glasses, I returned to my comfortable spot on the couch. Macy swirled her wine, took a sip, and swirled it again. She looked like she was going to say something, but then she took another sip, swirled her glass, stood up, and then started walking around the room.

"I know I'm on probation, but you're acting weird. I need to know what the hell is going on," she said.

"What are you talking about? How am I acting weird?" As I started swirling my wine, I wondered why she would think that.

My phone chirped, interrupting our conversation.

"I gotta take this," I said as I reached for my phone.



Liam: Thinking of you.



Dani: I love you. Macy came over.



Liam: Stay out of trouble.



Dani: No fun in that.



Liam: Being my bad girl?



Dani: Whatcha gonna do about it?



Liam: Plenty.



Dani: Can't wait. XOXO.



Liam: XOXO.



Macy stood over me, reading my messages. I glared at her.

"Dani, tell me what's going on. When you're with Liam, you're happy and in love. I come over here and see that you're completely at home, wearing his clothes. I've never seen you like this before. It's great. I'm happy for you, but something's off. You're drinking tea and doing yoga with that skank, Madison. Chris told me all about her." Macy pressed her lips together, raising her eyebrow.

"Really?" I was intrigued. Liam didn't talk, but Chris was another story. "What did he say? She's not easy to get to know."

"She's no saint, and she has a reputation for it. Apparently, she knows what she's doing in the bedroom."

"Macy, I don't care about that. I'm interested in her cockblocker. I'm assuming it's Chris's friend, the one that gave Liam the certificate. Something's going on there."

"He says I don't know him. Frankly, I don't give a shit about the guy as long as he keeps that skank away from my Chris."

"Hmmm, maybe we should go watch them play basketball."

With that thought, I got very excited. Madison was wrong about me being in denial. She, on the other hand, was another story, and I was going to get to the bottom of it.

"Why on earth would I do that? I couldn't care less about Madison. I'm not crowding Chris, and I'm not coming off as needy by stalking for that skank," she said, scrunching her face.

She was acting as though I'd lost my mind.

"Because you love to stalk, and you owe me." I smiled smugly.

Macy rolled her eyes. "That was a very clever attempt on your part to change the subject. Back to what I was saying, you're happy with Liam. I don't care that you're friends with Madison. I'm not jealous even though that's what Chris says. I promise you that I'm not. I don't care if you want to drink liquid ass."

I laughed. Wheatgrass was disgusting. Madison had been wrong. My body didn't crave it. My body repelled it.

"Macy, I'm not following you. Everything you've said is good. So, why are you staging a confrontation?" I sipped my drink. I was so confused. "By the way, you don't have to worry about Madison taking your coveted spot as my BFF."

"Ever since Candace left, you've been weird on Saturdays. When I get to Van Dyke's, you're different, like you're hiding something. Let's see. You're not eating, you're having hot flashes, you're flustered, and you're distracted."

I took a long sip of wine, burying my face in my glass, as I tried to hide my shock.

Instantly, memories of spending time with Rick with his dimpled smile and his penetrating gaze flashed through my mind. I thought about his hand on the small of my back as we walked to the cafe to have breakfast, which was becoming a regular occurrence, and then rushing to get to Van Dyke's without being caught. I couldn't tell her. Even if she didn't say anything to Chris, she wouldn't understand that my time with him was actually helping me. She hated Rick. Regardless, Macy was totally off base. I was perfectly fine and completely in control.

Something else was bothering her, and I was convinced it had to do with my growing friendship with Madison.

"I don't know what you're talking about." I refilled my glass and then tipped the bottle toward Macy, offering her more. "First, you accuse me of having a hormonal imbalance, and now, you say something is going on. Macy, we're both adjusting to not having Candace around. We've all been together for so long that her not being here is unnatural and weird for us. I have to agree with Chris." I pinched my fingers together as I said, "I think you're just a wee bit jealous of my new pal, Madison."

"I love you like a sister." Macy put down her glass. "Whatever's going on between Friday night and Saturday morning, you can tell me."

"Nothing's going on. I promise," I confirmed.

I was confident that Macy was exaggerating. Yes, I was a little flustered and distracted after my run-ins with Rick. That had more to do with rushing back than anything else. Everything was perfectly fine.

While we continued drinking the bottle of wine, we watched Sweet Home Alabama for the hundredth time.

"Melanie Carmichael or Smooter." Macy laughed into her glass. "She had it rough with those two hot guys, Jake and Andrew." She fanned herself. "She obviously wasn't over her ex as she lied and stringed along McDreamy."

"Mace, you're completely simplifying the entire plot. Melanie had many layers," I snapped. "Melanie ran away because she was ashamed of her past and needed a clean start. Andrew was her present, and she didn't want him tainted by what she used to be. She wasn't pretending with him, and she wasn't really lying lying. She just didn't tell him everything because she knew he wouldn't understand the truth. Who was the real Melanie? Jake wasn't the ex. He was still her husband. Andrew was just the distraction," I reasoned. "Do you think Liam is Jake or Andrew? Who would Rick be?"

"I'm cutting you off. You aren't making any sense. I can so totally see Liam as Jake. Liam would dig that glass out of the sand, and holy shit, he has the blue eyes to match. As for Rick, he's that dog's shit. Don't go dissing Patrick Dempsey by comparing him to Rick." She paused while her eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Wait a second. Is Rick still bothering you? If he is, I'll kick his ass."

"Nope. He's not bothering me at all," I said, watching the credits roll on the TV. I told her the truth. He wasn't bothering me.

"You'd tell me if he was, right?"

I glanced over at her. She was sitting on her knees, staring at me.

"Yes, of course. Come on, I nearly ate you alive that last time I saw him."

I was going to burn in hell for lying to her. She would just blow everything out of proportion. Madison had even come to the wrong conclusions.

Rick and I had a past. That was where it was. So, we had spontaneous encounters that took us back there. It was nice, innocent, and no big deal. Nothing was going on.

Macy took my wine glass and placed it in the sink. "You've become a major lightweight since you started drinking that wheat shit."

"Have not." I yawned, stretching my arms.

"Whatever. Lightweight," she said sarcastically. When she returned from the kitchen, she continued her analysis of the movie. "The moral of the story is don't play with metal rods in a storm and not expect to get hit by lightning. Well, that, and there's always a happy ending." Macy shrugged her shoulders. "And, you, my dear friend, are finally getting your happily ever after."

"I hope you're right as long as he doesn't get himself killed or get bored of me." I hugged her. "And they didn't get hit by lightning, doofus. They kissed, and it was one of Hollywood's best kisses ever."

"Lightweight. You're so dramatic and negative. I've seen the way that man kisses you. I think it would qualify as one of the all-time hottest kisses ever. Go to sleep. I'll see you tomorrow." She grabbed her stuff and headed to the door.





Macy was right. I was a lightweight. My head was spinning. I couldn't shake Macy's observations. Madison had been wrong. Love wasn't an illusion, and I wasn't in denial, if that had been what she meant. I looked around the well-lit room. There were no shadows playing on the wall. There were no illusions masking as truths. This was the place I called home. All was right in my life. I had everything under control.