The American Bride

chapter Twelve

"Offhand, my child, I'd say you've made a fine muddle of things."

Cara's grandmother, Liela, spoke dryly to the misty-eyed girl who slumped in the chair across from her. She had listened as the story unfolded and watched the play of emotion on Cara's face and the unspoken words behind her faltering explanations.

"I'm terribly sorry, Grandmother. Really I am," Cara said. "I did try to stay in the background. It all just seemed to happen without my having any control. Please don't be angry, Gran."

"I'm not angry, Cara."

At her grandmother's warm words, Cara glanced up in surprise. It was true. The Duchess didn't look angry. In general, she looked pleased and there was almost a smug, satisfied gleam in her eyes. Although puzzled by the older woman's manner, the girl hurried on.

"At least there isn't any open scandal. At least not yet. Luckily Julian was called away," Cara explained. Then as Liela continued to smile, Cara's eyes opened wide in wonder. "The paper he was reading. It was a letter. And, if my guess is correct, you sent it."

"The letter I think you are referring to, Cara, was one I sent to Lord Wilton requesting his presence most urgently. After all with Julian at Weathersfield it would have been difficult to send a carriage to collect you without him suspecting something was rather havey-cavey. Of course when I penned the note I had no idea you were in such a tight fix."

"You mean, Julian is here?" Cara gasped, leaping to her feet.

"No. No. Softly, child. Remember it's late and I am still an old woman." The Duchess chuckled at the snort of disbelief from her cheeky granddaughter. "When Lord Wilton arrived, he was instructed to return in the morning. I imagine he's safely ensconced in one of his clubs working off his frustration by drinking with his cronies. Men have a difficult time dealing with the crotchets of old ladies."

"But what will I say to him? What will I do?"

The Duchess watched in amusement as Cara paced across the carpet. It reminded her of a similar scene just a month ago. Then, the girl had been decrying the existence of her marriage; now, she was terrified that this same marriage might be terminated.

All in all the older woman was well pleased. It appeared that the child must have some sort of feeling for Julian. Although Cara had spoken of her fondness for the children, the Duchess could see the pain that crossed the girl's face when her husband's name was mentioned. There were some obvious gaps in Cara's story during which, Liela suspected, Julian had acted less than gentlemanly. Apparently he had drawn the line at actually compromising her granddaughter.

"Are you in love with Wilton?"

Cara's head snapped up. For a moment the Duchess expected she would answer in the negative. Then the girl sighed, settling herself on the soft carpeting in front of her grandmother.

"I'm afraid so, Gran," she whispered. "I love him with all my heart."

Smiling down at Cara's radiant face, the Duchess remembered her own impetuous romance. Her gnarled fingers smoothed the reddish curls away from the girl's soft white forehead. One beringed hand traced down the soft cheek and cupped the firm chin. "Then, my child, you'll just have to wait and see what we can do."

"But he'll be so angry." Cara winced imagining Julian's fury.

"Perhaps. Men are rarely amused by a woman's machinations.

Even though our manipulations are generally for their own good," she finished spiritedly. "At any rate there's no point in getting into a pother until we hear from Julian. No need to rush your fences."

The Duchess yawned, covering her mouth delicately with her blue-veined hands. Then she patted the girl once more.

"It's already past midnight, Cara. Tomorrow will be another day. Time then to resolve all these problems." Cara helped the old woman to her feet. "It will be pleasant dealing with your troubles in the daytime, my dear. Every time you appear I am kept much too late from my bed," she reproved, then her expression softened. "I have the feeling that no matter what tomorrow brings I will be pleased to have you here in England."

"Goodnight, Gran," Cara said kissing the wrinkled cheek. "I'm glad to be here with you, too. No matter what."

But Cara's brave words disappeared as she lay sleepless in her bed. Over and over she remembered Julian's fury and his insulting suggestions. No matter what happened she feared she would be unhappy with the outcome. The bright morning brought little relief to Cara's mind. She breakfasted with her grandmother but could barely swallow any of her food. The Duchess refused to discuss anything until after she had seen and talked to Julian. Until then Cara must be content to wait.

When he was announced, Cara was directed to the garden until the Duchess sent someone for her. The last thing she saw was the regal figure of her grandmother seated in a throne-like chair in the salon. The older woman was dressed in pearl-encrusted midnight blue silk. White lace ruffles at neck and wrists were spattered with brilliants and in her ring-covered hands she gripped a Malacca walking stick with an enormous ruby embedded in the top. She almost pitied Julian in his interview with the intimidating Duchess.

Cara strolled amid the flowerbeds hoping that the gentle beauty of her surroundings would ease the tension of the morning. Birds flitted from tree to tree and, as she rounded a bend in the walk, two rabbits streaked ahead of her, disappearing under a hedge. When she reached the gazebo she sank dispiritedly onto the cushioned seat.

For a while she tried to read the book of poetry she had brought with her but found that although her eyes skimmed the words on the page her brain refused to register their meaning. Finally she leaned her head against one of the pillars and closed her eyes.

"Cara!"

The angry shout brought Cara instantly awake and she shook her head to clear the cobwebs that had coated her brain. Striding furiously along the path was Julian. The flash of fury on his face banished her hopes and she turned to flee.

Julian bounded up the steps, grasping Cara's wrist before she could get away. Whirling her around, he speared the girl with the intensity of his gaze. He caught his breath as he stared down at her. The baggy-dressed governess was gone and in her place was an exquisite creature he barely recognized.

Cara wore a celestial blue gauze frock, tied beneath her breasts with varicolored ribbons. The simple lines and clinging material emphasized the rounded curves of her body. Her hair, which Julian had seen only once, floated around her face and hung down her back in a glorious halo of burnished curls. Flushed with discomfort her face was the creamy rose of a healthy complexion. For a moment he stared down at the quaking figure with admiration, but when his eyes touched her blue-green ones his anger was rekindled.

"You gave me your word you wouldn't leave Weathersfield!" he barked. "I find it unpardonable that you should break it."

"I didn't!" Cara shouted back at him, insulted that he should mistrust her so. "You made me promise that I would not steal a horse. And I didn't," she finished triumphantly.

"You are the most infuriatingly annoying young woman it has ever been my misfortune to meet!"

"And you, sir, are the most arrogant, insensitive person that I have ever known!"

Cara flung away from Julian, moving back against the wooden railing of the gazebo. Her chest rose and fell with the rush of emotion racing through her veins at his presence. Peeking at Julian through the lacy network of her eyelashes, she acknowledged that his face was slightly haggard but despite that he was so handsome that Cara felt her heart swell with pride.

"Why aren't you still at Weathersfield? How did you get here?" Julian's questions shot out rapidly permitting no reply. "And what the Devil are you doing in the Duchess' gardens?"

"You seem to have forgotten, Lord Wilton, that I came to your employ through the helpful services of the Duchess. She sent for me not long after you left Weathersfield."

"I had forgotten; so much has happened since that time." Julian ran his hand through his hair in agitation. He seemed distracted for all his anger. His face was baffled as well as furious. In frustration he grasped her arm, pulling her towards a bench along the side of the tiny structure.

"Sit down, Cara." Julian spoke harshly but despite the fierceness of voice his hands were gentle as he pushed her onto the bench. "I must talk with you. It may be the last chance we'll ever have."

Cara's heart jolted with the pain of his words. The interview with her grandmother must have gone very badly indeed. She had hoped at least for some kind of hearing but by his words it was evident that Julian had made up his mind to reject her. In agony she stared at her hands praying for the strength to endure the discussion with some dignity. But it was so difficult, she thought, biting her trembling lip. She loved Julian so much that the thought of never seeing him again was almost more than she could bear.

"I asked the Duchess to begin annulment proceedings."

Julian flung himself away from Cara as though her very presence was repugnant to him. As he paced back and forth in front of her, Cara's mind refused to take in any of his other words. Her heart felt as though it were breaking at his harsh statement. She had expected him to be angry but she had always held out some hope that he would show some understanding.

In a small voice she asked, "Is there no hope for us?"

"No!" The bald syllable tore across Cara's heart and for a moment blackness engulfed her. Fighting against the swoon, she tried to sit straighter but her whole body trembled at his next words.

"The Duchess has suggested that you be sent back to America on one of the ships belonging to her family."

"Oh no," Cara wailed. At least she had hoped to be able to stay in England. Somehow she might even see Julian, although his offended behavior gave her little encouragement that their future meetings would be anything but coldly formal.

"You will leave as soon as arrangements can be made," Julian rasped out.

Keeping her head bent Cara was able to stem the tears that threatened to overflow. Although inwardly shattered, she attempted to salvage a little of her pride.

"And the children?" she whispered.

"I know the children love you. It will be horrible for them but they're young and will get over it."

Cara was silent, aghast at the disaster she had created with her scheming. To lose Julian was to lose her life and now even the children would be gone.

Fidgeting in the silence, Julian finally burst out, "You can see that there is no other way. We can not be together in the same household."

Cara flinched at his cutting words and glanced up at the face of the man who was her whole world. Julian's features were distorted with anger and has hands flexed as though he wanted to strangle her.

"Do you hate me so much then?"

Cara gasped at her own temerity. Then she recoiled as Julian lunged toward her. His hands bit into her shoulders as he hauled her to her feet. In his agitation he shook her until Cara thought her neck might break.

"Hate you? Haven't you been listening to me at all? My dear girl, I love you. That's why you must go away."

"Love me?" Cara felt stupid with her inability to understand.

For answer Julian pulled her against his chest, bending his head to her ashen face. His kiss was excruciatingly gentle as he tried to communicate his love for her without words. Cara was stunned momentarily, then her heart expanded at the wonder of his words as their meaning finally penetrated her brain. Her senses fired at his touch. Blissfully Cara melted against him, reaching up to circle his neck with her arms. With a groan of despair, Julian tore her arms down and pushed her away.

"Now do you see why it's impossible? I couldn't keep my hands off you if you were to remain in England."

He flung himself down on the wooden bench. His breathing was ragged as he fought for control. Puzzled by his behavior and even more confused by his words Cara stared down at him in motionless dismay. Then suddenly her eyes opened wide and she expelled her breath in a sigh of pure pleasure. She knelt down at Julian's feet taking his hands in her own. Putting them against her cheek she scanned his anguished face.

"Please, Julian, don't be angry with me. At least not yet," Cara cautioned with a guilty laugh. "You say you came to the Duchess to ask for an annulment of your marriage. Why, Julian?"

"Because I had fallen in love with you," he stated flatly.

Cara closed her eyes, bending her head to kiss his hands. Then glancing up into his beloved face she smiled. It was a smile of such infinite sweetness that Julian found his own heart swelling with love.

"Did you tell her Grace why you wanted an annulment?"

"I tried. I couldn't seem to be able to explain it very well." Julian clutched at Cara's hands by way of apology at his own inadequacies. "It had never mattered before whom I married. What little I had seen of marital bliss was a sham. I had never met a woman I could either love or trust. And then you came storming into my peaceful life."

Julian's dark head bent to Cara's burnished curls and he kissed the silken strands. Then tipping her head, he kissed her softly on the lips.

"You annoyed me. You angered me. You frustrated me at every turn. You took over my household; made me burn with desire and had the audacity to criticize my behavior toward the children."

Cara had the good grace to look shamefaced but Julian did not fail to spot the mischievous smile at the corners of her mouth.

"You ran from me in the woods and I searched for you all over the county. And there you sat, night after night, in the schoolroom telling stories and embroidering some infernal chair cover. I must have been blind."

"But I didn't want you to find me," Cara declared.

Defiantly she met Julian's black-browed glare. Then ignoring the interruption he continued.

"You were everywhere I looked. And when I didn't see you I thought about you. First it was in anger; then in frustrated desire. And finally with love," he finished quietly.

The two of them were silent. Cara was the first to break the spell of enchantment around them. Her question jolted Julian back to the present.

"What did the Duchess say about the annulment?"

"She said it was impossible," Julian replied furiously. "She even had the gall to ask me if I intended to make you my mistress."

"Do you, Julian?" Cara asked curiously.

"I could never treat you so shabbily, my dear," he answered. "I do love you so but I could never permit you to become the topic of malicious gossip. It seems our honor stands in the way of our love."

His last words were spoken ironically as he brought her hand to his lips. Gazing down at the exquisite girl at his feet he was proud of his decision no matter how much it hurt. Cara's face glowed with pride and her eyes touched him with love.

"So you see, my dear, this is goodbye. I was sent out here to wait for my wife. Unaccountably I found you instead."

It was Cara's turn to feel fear. She had listened to Julian's declaration without thought to the eventual outcome. Now it was time for her to confess. In her heart Cara suspected that her revelations would not be met with the same joy in which she had received Julian's confidences.

"Julian, do you swear that you love me?" Cara begged earnestly.

"Of course, I do. But it solves nothing in our present damnable situation?"

"Even if I tell you that I've done something so terrible that you may have trouble forgiving me?"

"Ah, sweetheart, you could never have done anything that dreadful." he patted Cara's shoulder as though consoling a distraught child.

"But I have, Julian. You see I am your wife," she blurted out.

"You're what?" Julian shook his head in bewilderment.

"I am your wife," Cara repeated. "The Duchess' granddaughter. I am Caroline Leland."

Julian stared at Cara in stupefaction, unable to understand her meaning at first. Slowly his eyes narrowed and she turned away from the penetrating brown stare that bored into her heart. He jerked his hands away from her. Jumping to his feet he glared down at the abject girl, crumpled like a wilted flower.

"Do you mean to tell me you wormed your way into my household under false pretenses?" he thundered.

Cara flinched as his angry words pounded at her. Now that she had confessed, her bravery deserted her and she cowered at Julian's feet.

"Yes, Julian, but...."

"And all the time you were preaching at me about the honesty of Americans?" He whirled around striking out at the pillar of the gazebo. "What a mockery. You must have laughed into your hand at the spectacle I was making."

He stormed to the far side and leaned on the railing, staring out over the Duchess' lush gardens. Scrambling to her feet Cara ran after him, stopping in dismay as she faced the rigid wall of his back.

"Oh, Julian, it was never like that. Please believe me," she argued. "I was desperate. I was married to a man I had never seen. All I wanted was to find out a little about you before we were forced to begin our married life." She stared at his rigid figure.

As Julian continued to turn from her Cara felt a frisson of fear but then she remembered what little choice she had at the time. Her voice which had been pleading took on a note of indignation at the injustice of her situation.

"Perhaps you have a right to be angry. But all I intended to do was just to observe you. I was to stay in the background and then was to return here. And you would never have known." Cara waited for a moment hoping for some sign of thawing, then at his continued silence found herself once more furious with him. "Besides you were hateful at first, I just couldn't keep quiet. The children needed me to speak for them."

Julian turned, his eyes taking in Cara's angry expression. It seemed strange that he had never even considered what his bride would feel on her arrival in England. He had given so little thought to the marriage. Looking down at Cara he was suffused with fury, but this time at his own insensitivity. Gently he gathered her into his arms.

"My darling girl, I never realized what an awful prospect our marriage was for you. I didn't think how dreadful it would be for a gently bred girl to be suddenly faced with a stranger who had all the rights of a husband."

"But you see I made a pretty mess of everything," Cara said. "I had come to love you, Julian. If I could have just remained uninvolved everything would have been well."

Cara's eyes brimmed with tears of love that overflowed as she reached up to encircle his neck. With infinite care, Julian bent to kiss her tear-stained cheeks. He tasted the salt and followed the trail of moisture to the corner of her mouth where he nibbled for a moment. He smiled tenderly at the girl in his arms.

"It wouldn't have all gone well, my dear, because by that time I had fallen in love with a saucy termagant who tyrannized my household."

Cara had the grace to blush at his teasing. Then tipping her head to the side she quirked an eyebrow up at him.

"Do you mind very much, milord?"

Julian's lips told her how little he minded. But suddenly he pushed her away and stared at her, a frown wrinkling his forehead.

"It's getting very confusing, you know. Miss Farraday. Caroline Leland. And now I'll have to learn another name. But Lady Wilton does become you."

Unabashedly the Duchess stood at the window watching as Julian bent his head to kiss the lovely girl in his arms. A smile of remembrance appeared at the corners of her mouth as she recalled her own romance. Cara was definitely going to brighten up the dull days ahead, the older woman thought. Perhaps she would soon be seeing a great grandchild. If only the child had red hair and a temper, the Duchess would be well satisfied.

THE END


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