The one worth waiting for.
Ali is everything I’ve ever wanted, everything I never knew I needed. Not just in looks. She is witty. I want to kiss even the words that come out of her mouth. She is smart, and she is strong. Stronger than she has realized. Stronger than me. She is loyal, brave. Honest. She refuses to lie. Does she know what a gift that is? She is comfort, and she is peace.
In a lifetime of war, she is my first taste of peace.
She spots us and smiles with delight. She literally glows, and it stops me in my tracks. How did I ever live without her? But she rushes into his arms. His. Gavin’s. Not mine.
She...chooses to be with him?
Will be with him?
I am struck dumb.
He wraps his arms around her. She frames his cheeks in her hands, as I’ve done so often to her, rises on her tiptoes and places a soft kiss on his lips.
Every cell in my body shouts in denial. I want to yank her away from him, wrap her in my arms, where she belongs, and demand she press her lips against mine. Only ever mine. I want to shake her. Shake her so hard the memory of Gavin is forever damaged. I want to tell her to keep her distance from the guy. To never speak to him. Never even glance at him. He is wrong for her. He’ll break her heart.
But it won’t do me any good. The visions are never wrong—
—the entertainment room washes away in a sea of black. I blink, and I’m back inside the bedroom. We’re back inside. Gavin stumbles away from me. He is pale, obviously shaken. I know he recently had a vision with Ali. In it, they didn’t just kiss; they made out. I’d heard about it from Gavin after Ali refused to speak of it. I have tried to convince myself they misinterpreted what they saw.
I can’t do that now.
“Leave,” I snap, gripping the arms of my chair to stop myself from reaching for him. I want to kill him. And I have the skills to do it. I can even make it look like an accident. I know where to hide the body. Ali will never know what’s happened. But she might miss him, might mourn him—and the thought of that maddens me. “Leave now.”
He does. It saves his life.
I try to breathe. There are now a thousand land mines in my mind, and I’m stepping over every single one of them. Ali will leave me. Boom! Ali will fall for Gavin. Boom! Ali will kiss and touch Gavin. Boom! Gavin will win her, and I...I will lose her. Boom, boom!
I’m not used to helplessness. If there’s a problem, I act. I fix. Things get better. But there’s nothing I can do about this and I know it. I can’t make someone love me.
She shifts on the mattress and her eyelids flutter open, revealing eyes the color of a perfect summer morning, clear and blue, startling.
“Hey there,” I say. I reach for her hand, but stop myself just before contact.
She can’t quite focus. “Hey.” Her voice is different. Hoarser. “I’m glad you’re speaking to me again.”
I should smile at her, reassure her in some way, but I frown. She’s glad I’m here now. But how long will that last? When will she rejoice over Gavin’s presence?
“I wasn’t ever not speaking to you,” I say.
“You were avoiding me, then.”
I can’t lie to her—won’t. “Yes.”
Her gaze meets mine, and just like with Gavin, a vision kicks off—
—we are in Ankh’s entertainment room. I’m standing across from her...smiling at something Veronica is saying to me. I’m barely listening, too consumed by the fact that Ali is in front of Gavin again, cupping his cheeks again.
Despite the distance, I can hear what she’s saying to him. “You’re a better man than I ever gave you credit for.”
“I know,” Gavin replies. He is total cocky assurance, and I want to slam my fist into his nose, smashing cartilage into his brain.
“And you’re so modest,” Ali says.
He chuckles. “Are you happy with the way things turned out?”
She glances in my direction, unconcerned by the fact that Veronica is at my side.
Unconcerned. As if she doesn’t care that I’m with an ex. As if she doesn’t care about me.
“Yeah,” she says. “Yeah, I am—”
—the vision ends before she can say anything more, gone in a single, broken heartbeat.
I drop my head into my upraised hands, scrub my fingers through my already mussed hair. More proof. The end is near. The countdown clock on our relationship is running down.
Anger fills me. No. Anger is not a strong enough word. Rage fills me. It’s dark, heavy and barbed, weighing me down, cutting at me. Why Gavin? Why him and not me?
“Gavin’s a man-whore, you know.” I infuse my voice with ice to hide the savagery of my rage. “Never been with the same girl twice. And he’s never liked blondes. He won’t stay with you for long.”
“I’m not interested in Gavin,” she rushes out. “Cole, you have to—”
“Don’t say anything. Just...don’t.” Her reassurance will only make things worse. One day, I will have to watch her fall deeper and deeper for one of my friends. I will be shredded.