“Knock it off, Tru.” She comes over and sits beside me, in my soon to be owned outfit.
“You’re hurting right now.” Her voice is soft, careful. “As to be expected. And the best way to help that hurt is to try to feel good about yourself. Put on a beautiful dress and a pair of killer heels, and yes, you may still feel crap on the inside, but on the outside you’ll look knock out, and that will be the one thing that will keep the smile plastered on your face for the night.” She nudges me with her shoulder, smiling.
“Fine,” I huff. “I’ll wear the stupid dress.”
“Good. And while I’m in an advice giving mood, can I give you another piece of advice?”
I turn my head, looking straight at her. “If it’s about Jake, then no.”
She gives me a no-nonsense look. “Talk to him, Tru. I’ve kept my opinion to myself on this, and I’ve done the supportive best friend bit, but now I’m telling you how it is – blanking Jake like this is no good for either of you.” She puts her hand on my forearm. “And you can blast me for it all you want, but … I believe him. I think he’s telling the truth. I don’t believe he had sex with that tramp. I think she’s just a gold-digging opportunistic little whore. And honestly, I can’t even begin to imagine how painful it was walking in and seeing him in bed with her like that … and yes, he absolutely let you down with the drugs,” she quickly adds, when I open my mouth to speak. “But you can’t go on like this. You need to talk to him. And honestly,” she sighs. “I think you know all of this too, but for some reason I can’t fathom, you won’t let him in to fix things. And it’s just not like you to be so unforgiving, Tru.”
I scruff the toe of my boot against the carpet. She’s skirting so close to the truth right now. Closer than I want.
“Jake loves you, that is more than clear to see,” she goes on, “and I know you love him too. So you just need to talk to him and figure out a fix for the both of you.”
And because she’s so close to the truth I get angry.
I get to my feet, feeling a little more than vexed. “You’re supposed to be on my side here, Simone.”
“I am on your side.” She stands too, facing me. “And that’s why I’m saying this. I hate seeing you hurting so badly when it can be so easily fixed. If you just talk to him, listen to what he has to say...” She puts her hands on my upper arms. “Honestly, babe, if I thought for one minute that he’d done the deed with the that little tramp, then I’d be winging your corner and kicking his ass to Hell and back … but I honestly don’t think he has,” she’s shaking her head. “He’s made mistakes, some big whooping ones, but not that one.”
Tears are welling in my eyes.
“I’m not trying to upset you, honey.” She takes me into her arms, hugging me. “It just really needed saying.”
I squeeze my eyes shut, fighting the tears back. “I just can’t get that image of him in bed with her out of my head.” I bang my palm against forehead. “And honestly…” I bite my lip, cursing myself for finally saying this. “I just … well I just don’t think I’m cut out for all of this. I’m not cut out for his lifestyle – everything that comes with him.”
Leaning back, she looks at my face. “That’s what this is all about isn’t it? Why you’ve shutdown on him completely.”
I brush a stray tear away. “At first, I honestly believed he had cheated with her after catching them like that. But as time's gone on…” I sigh. “No, I don’t think he has cheated, but her selling her story and all the attention it’s brought to me … well it just made me realise what my fears were all along about being with Jake.”
I’ve known this for a while, but I’ve just been covering it with the whole cheating thing. It went way beyond Kaitlyn Bitch the instant the press set up camp on my parents’ doorstep.
“Which are?” she pushes.
“Who he is. Everything that comes with him. There’s just no privacy, Simone. We can barely even go out on a date without someone there taking his picture, wanting his autograph, wanting a piece of him. It doesn’t feel like there is just ever me and him – that he’ll ever fully be mine – and yes I know how selfish that sounds. But I just want a normal life. A private life. I don’t want a life where every time I have a fight with my boyfriend, or we go on a date together, that it will be splashed all over the internet the very next day for people’s breakfast reading.”
The truth is there’s only ever been one time where I’ve felt like our relationship truly belonged to just me and Jake, and that was our night at Lumb Falls.
“So talk to him, tell him this,” Simone urges, gently.
I shake my head, no.
“You’re a stubborn ass, Trudy Bennett. Give the guy a fighting chance, seriously, because currently he’s all broken up and hurting over something he didn’t do, desperate to reach you and let you know that. But currently he’s fighting out of the wrong corner. It’s not fair to him, Tru, and you know it.”