The Education of Sebastian

“I love you and I want to marry you. What else do you want to know?”


“Everything! What’s your favorite book? What’s your favorite film? What was your best subject in school? Who was your first crush? What CD have you got in your player at home right now? What do you eat for breakfast? Do you prefer football or baseball? Were you a jock at school? Did you ever date a cheerleader? Do you remember your dreams? What’s your favorite color? Have you ever cried watching a movie? I don’t know – everything!”

He let out a deep sigh.

“Okay, I get it. I’m rushing you.”

I frowned.

“That’s not it – well, not entirely. It’s just… we’ve done everything backwards.”

I walked over to him and laid my hand on his chest. “I want to know everything: inside as well as out. I want to know you.”

He held my hand and played with my fingers but he still couldn’t look at me. He was really upset. I guess being turned down when you ask someone to marry you would get you that way. I’d hurt him – and he was the last person in the whole world that I wanted to hurt.

I pulled my hand free and held his face until he had to look at me.

“Sebastian, I feel like you’ve woken me from a dream. But I barely know who I am, let alone… I’m sorry I hurt you. I would never want to do that.”

I rested my lips on his, two, three times, trying to convey a message with my light touch.

He pulled away and looked at me.

“Old Yeller.”

“Excuse me?”

“That was a film that made me cry: when he had to shoot his dog.”

“How old were you when you saw it?”

“Ten, maybe. I’m not sure. I always hoped we’d have a dog, but mom said they made too much mess. Do you like dogs?”

“Yes. When I was growing up a neighbor had a little Jack Russell terrier called ‘Tano’. He said the name meant ‘number five’ but I don’t remember what language that was. She was so sweet. I cried for three days when she died. Dad wanted to buy me a puppy but mom wouldn’t let him, so I got a goldfish instead.”

“A goldfish?!”

I grinned at him. “Yes, not quite the same thing! I called him ‘Splash’ – not very original.”

“We could get a dog.”

“What, and take him on the back of our motorcycle through Italy?!”

“Yeah! A biker dog! That would be awesome!”

I laughed.

“What’s your favorite film?” he said.

“I can only think of animal films now. I don’t know, ‘White Fang’ maybe or ‘Call of the Wild’. Oh, but I love ‘Gone with the Wind’.”

He pulled a face.

“What was the last film that made you cry?”

“I cry at most films. Er… ‘Edward Scissorhands’ – that always makes me cry.”

“Who was your first crush? It had better be a film star though or I might have to hunt him down.”

“Better get your gun then!”

“Why?”

“Anthony Kiedis.”

“Who?”

“The vocalist from the Red Hot Chili Peppers.”

“You like rock?”

“I like all sorts of music.”

He laughed happily.

“God, I love you!”

I couldn’t help smiling back at him. “What?”

“Just when I think I know you, you surprise the shit out of me.”

I sat on his lap and put my arms around his neck.

“Okay, your turn: favorite book?”

“Heart of Darkness.”

“Ugh! Why that? It’s a horrible story!”

“I guess because it shows how… how far a man can go when he’s in a place without limits.”

“Hmm: I don’t think you’ll turn me into a Conrad fan. Ok: first girl you ever kissed?”

He reddened and looked down.

“Go on, tell me. I won’t be jealous. Well, maybe a bit.”

“Brenda Wiseman.”

“And how old were you?”

“Sixteen.”

I couldn’t help thinking that wasn’t so very long ago for him. And then my overactive brain imagined him making out with her and…

“What happened to her?”

“Nothing.”

“Well what happened with her?”

He shook his head, clearly embarrassed. I was intrigued.

“Come on, tell me. It can’t be that bad.”

“We dated for a while…”

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