Then I heard the floorboards creak as he stood up, and felt the mattress shift as he climbed onto the bed. He hesitated for a second, and then I felt him nudge my hand out of the way, as he circled his fingers around, then pushed two inside me.
I groaned loudly when he fastened his mouth over my breast and started to tease the nipple out, sucking hard. I ran my hands over his shoulders and felt a slight tremor ripple through him. He moved over to my other breast, swirling his tongue around and over me, pulling lightly with his teeth, filling me with need.
Then his kisses trailed down my body, and I held my breath as I felt his tongue sliding inside me.
I called out his name, and he pushed my legs further apart, really working me, and I orgasmed loudly, watching as he moved up to kiss my thigh.
“Much, much better than my imagination, Sebastian!” I gasped.
He chuckled quietly.
I brushed my hands over his briefs, unable to help myself.
“Oh, you’re so hard, tesoro… I want you inside me.”
“Where are the fucking condoms, Caro,” he said, in a tight voice.
“Don’t need them: I’ve been taking the pill. Just you, Sebastian, now.”
I pushed his briefs over his hips, and fastened both hands over his erection and guided him inside me.
He groaned, a long, drawn-out sigh of pleasure.
It felt so good, stretching and filling, deep inside me. I clenched around him.
“Fuck, Caro!” he gasped.
“Don’t try and control it,” I begged him, “Just love me. Love me, Sebastian.”
He flexed his hips and began to thrust into me.
It felt so intense; we were so intimately connected, joined together, man and woman, moving as one body, one soul, one purpose.
He cried out and shuddered, pouring himself inside me, filling me with his love and trust, bringing us together again.
When he’d finished, he rested between my thighs, his face buried in my neck, his breath still coming in gasps. I stroked his back and told him I loved him.
Eventually he pulled out and curled up next to me: I could feel his cheeks were wet with tears.
“Are you okay?” I said, quietly.
He nodded without speaking, and then he opened his eyes and smiled at me.
“Very okay, Caro. I’m very okay.”
And we held each other without the need to speak again.
After that, the dam holding back our intimacy had been breached, and Sebastian’s mind started to heal as well as his body.
There was something I had to ask him, and I didn’t know if it was going to be a good idea or not.
We were slumped together on the sofa, drinking herbal tea just before going to bed. I didn’t really enjoy the thin, bitter liquid, but caffeine made Sebastian jumpy.
“Sebastian, can I ask you something?”
“Sure, baby,” he said, running his hand down my arm, and twining his fingers with mine.
“Well, I was wondering… what are your nightmares about?”
I felt him tense immediately, and regretted my question.
“It’s hard to talk about, Caro,” he said, his voice low and quiet.
“It’s okay – you don’t have to tell me.”
“I just don’t want you to have that shit in your head.”
“Sebastian, you wake up screaming every night – it doesn’t have to be me, but I think you need to tell someone.”
“I’m not seeing a fucking shrink,” he said, testily.
I didn’t reply.
We sat silently, staring out of the windows, watching the horizon growing paler as the sun sank behind the sea.
And then he began to speak.
“I can’t tell you everything, Caro, because it’s classified, and you can’t report any of this.”
“Of course not!”