I was really worried, wondering what to do for the best. I glanced around, seeing if there were any taxis nearby. And then I was astonished to see a small smile lift Sebastian’s lips.
My heart soared. I hadn’t seen him smile like that since he’d come home.
As we walked past, Sebastian threw in a comment. The men stared at him in amazement. One called out something else and Sebastian replied. Suddenly all the men started shouting at once. They came towards him, and I was worried it might be too much, but soon they were deep in conversation and I could tell they were asking him questions. Then Sebastian grinned at them. It was like seeing the sun after a month of rain, and I dared to feel hope.
They talked a little longer and then Sebastian introduced me. The men greeted me respectfully but with little interest, and eventually, after several more minutes where I didn’t understand a single word, but stood happily as Sebastian stroked my hand, watching him chat away, he said goodbye and we carried on walking.
“What on earth were you talking about for so long?”
“Baseball,” he said.
I stared at him doubtfully.
“You’re kidding me?”
He smiled again, “Universal language, Caro.”
And just like that, the world began to turn again.
The first change was that Sebastian started doing the exercises that the therapist had given him: exercises to help build up dexterity in the fingers of his left hand, and leg stretches to help the damaged muscles of his right thigh, and he even used the exercise bike that I’d ordered for him – although he’d shouted at me the day it had been delivered. He also began doing sit-ups and push-ups with a vengeance.
The second change came a week after meeting the Afghan men. It was evening, and I was standing in the kitchen, cooking pasta arrabiata for our supper, when Sebastian poked his head around the door, a quizzical expression on his face.
I stared at him for a moment before I realized what was different.
“You’ve shaved!”
“Well, you didn’t like the beard, did you?”
“That’s putting it mildly, Sebastian.”
He looked so beautiful, my heart gave another, small, hopeful lurch.
The third, and most startling change, was that he slipped his hands around my waist and nuzzled my neck. I was so shocked, I froze. His smile fell away and he let go.
“No, tesoro, no!” and I pulled his arms back around my waist, laying my head on his chest. I couldn’t help the tears spilling down my cheeks, soaking into his T-shirt.
“I’m so sorry, baby,” he said, stroking my hair.
“Oh, God, I’ve missed you, Sebastian.”
“I know, baby,” he said, gently, “but I’m here now.”
It felt so good to have his arms around me after months of his numb coldness and distance.
I lifted my head to look at him, and he wiped my tears away with his thumbs.
“I’m sorry I made you cry, baby,” he said, softly. “I never meant to hurt you. I know that I did.”
I locked my arms around his neck and pulled his head down, kissing his lips, gently at first, and then with increasing hunger and need.
He hesitated for a fraction of a second, then his lips parted and I felt his tongue sweep into my mouth, and sudden, hot, unexpected arousal flooded through me.
I moaned into his mouth, the intensity of my desire taking me by surprise. Sebastian gasped and stepped back half a pace, gazing down at me.
Inside, I was begging him not to reject me again, but I felt strongly that the next step needed to come from him.
“I want to make love to you, Caro.”
His voice was so quiet I could hardly hear him.
“You do?” I breathed.
“God, yes, baby. Only if you want to.”
I stared at his face, and found the love in his eyes that seemed to have been hidden for so long.
“I’ve waited and waited to hear you say that, tesoro.”
I turned off the gas stove, abandoning the pasta.
He held my hand, gazing into my eyes as we walked into the bedroom.
Chapter 18