She wouldn’t deny me that.
It had to be my baby. She was a f*ck
ing church mouse before I came along. I could tell by the tightness of her p*ssy
the very first time, the way she clung to me. No one else had f*ck
ed her in a good long while.
Just me.
“So you don't think-” I started to ask, fear and longing entering my mind for the first time in weeks.
“I honestly don’t know, but you deserved the right to know. I came over as soon as I got the information.” Janson shrugged.
I swallowed. I had to get to her, and I had to get to her now. I hadn’t been sleeping, I swear I lived on f*ck
ing bourbon and gin.
I needed her, and now that I knew she was carrying my baby it was my chance to get her back.
I couldn’t go another day without her.
“Get back to the office, I have somewhere to be.”
Chapter Twenty One
Joanna
“I’ve come to talk to my wife, and I’m not going away until she answers me. Joanna, you need to talk to me.” His hand slammed against the door the echo of it reverberating through the walls of the house. My dad was passed out drunk on the couch and I just stood there, on the other side of the wall, my back pressed against it.
I wanted to hear him, hear his voice, even if I knew I should have nothing to do with him. I’d called him a million times but I never let it go all the way through. I couldn’t. It was too much to bear.
I was a stain on his family. That’s what David said. I was going to betray him. The proof had all been right there, recorded for everyone to hear. They played it over and over again. Me talking to my uncle, the things I told him.
“I need to talk to you, Joanna. You have to at least give me that. You owe me that much.” His voice was raw, the pain evident as he ground out the words. He’d been drinking, and hard. I could hear it in his voice, hell, I could smell it through the f*ck
ing door.
“Go. Away.” I said, finally. I should’ve closed my mouth, pretended I wasn’t home. I knew he would go away after a while. But I couldn’t help myself. My hand flitted down to the tiniest of bumps on my belly and held on to that little bit of hope in my life. The only thing I had left.
“Jo-“
I’d already betrayed him, why wouldn’t I hesitated to do it again. They’d banished me for it. Even though I’d pleaded. Sent me back to live with my father, the drunk. If he was here, it was to ask something of me I didn’t want to do. I couldn’t do.
“Just, please. Go. Away.”
“Did you think I wouldn’t find out? That I wouldn’t know you’re pregnant. I know, Joanna.”
“Please-“
“We have to take care of it,” he said the slur of words almost unintelligible. “You have to let me take care of it.”
Take care of it. I knew it. He wanted it gone. No. There was no way in hell I was ever going to have an abortion. No way I would ever get rid of my baby. It was mine.
“How can you even ask that?” I screamed. “You have no right to.”
“You’re right, I don’t. But it’s what’s best for us, baby. Please.” He slammed against the door, the weight of his whole body heaving against the wood as it pushed me away.
“No. Just, go. Please go. This is my problem, not yours. You don’t have to be involved at all. But it’s mine. I won’t give it up.” I cried, the tears rolling freely down my face.
“What?” he asked.
“Get out of here, Greyson. Now.” My anger came in a new wave, the hurt of his rejection overwhelming me. I wasn’t going to just sit here and let him badger me into something I didn’t want. I needed him to go away. Needed him to know I was serious.
“Fine. But don’t expect me to stay away. I’ll be back, Jo. I’m not going anywhere. Not until I get what I want.” He growled through the door.
I sucked in breath after breath. He was going to make me do the one thing I didn’t want to, and I knew it. I was terrified of that. I was so scared he would strip this baby away from me.
But he turned around and left, I could hear his footsteps fleeing as he got in his car, revved the engine and drove away.
I let out a sigh of relief as I slumped against the door and slid down, sinking until my ass was on the hardwood and my knees were drawn together. I sobbed until I ran out of tears, the flow of them trickling to nothing. I’d never cried until I couldn’t, that was a new thing for me. I always heard about it, but I thought it was just one of those things people say. No, it’s real, and it hurts. It hurts not to have another tear to give to pain. I couldn’t believe the amount of hurt I was experiencing. It made me want to double over and just scream. Rage.