The same way I'd done before.
Except it never had been that easy to forget about him. I'd done a shit job of it. Silas had never left me – he was always there, a part of me. I might have walked away from West Bend, but I had never really left him behind.
I told myself that it was stupid to stay here. I should rip off the bandage and leave now, before it was too painful to do it later.
And then I'd checked out of the bed and breakfast, turned my bike around, and come right back here.
Back to Silas.
Silas came up behind me, crawled into bed, and slid his arm across the small of my back. “What are you thinking about?”
“Nothing,” I lied, changing the subject. “I was just looking at your bed. It’s so beautiful, just like your other furniture. Is it something local?”
“I made it,” Silas said.
I slid up to a sitting position and reached out to run my fingers along the headboard. “You made this,” I said. “Yourself.”
Silas nodded. “Don’t sound so surprised,” he said. “You don’t know everything there is to know about me.”
“Clearly,” I said. “You’re a man of mystery, Silas Saint.”
“I’m like the James Bond of West Bend, Colorado,” he said, winking.
“So you really made all of this?”
Silas shrugged. “After you left, I was pissed off at everyone and everything,” he said. “I threw myself into wrestling, and Coach Westmoreland knew my parents weren’t the best, so I ended up spending a lot of time at practice and stuff. He and his wife started letting me come home for dinners, that kind of thing. They didn’t have any kids – I don’t think she could have them-so they treated me like their own. Better than my parents did.”
“Your coach is the one renting you this place now,” I said.
“Yeah, his wife died a couple years back – I wasn’t here then – but I know he took it pretty hard. This was the first place I came right to when I came back to West Bend a few months ago. I didn’t even go to see my mother for a while after I got here,” he said. “I just came to see Coach.”
“What about the furniture?” I asked. “Is he the one who got you into making it?”
“Oh, yeah, the furniture,” Silas said. “It was Coach’s thing. He had his whole garage set up as this workshop, and he’d go in there and hole up and make things. After you left, he got me started in doing it. He said I needed to have something other than wrestling to occupy my mind, and wood-working was just relaxing.”
I wanted to tell Silas that he wasn’t the only one who had been devastated when I’d left. But instead, I touched the headboard of the bed, let my fingers linger on the surface of the wood that had been painstakingly carved and sanded until it was soft and smooth. “This is really cool, Silas,” I said.
“It’s aspen,” Silas said. “It’s local.”
“You should make pieces like this and sell them. You’re really good.”
He waved his hand dismissively. “Nah, I could never do that.”
“Why not?”
Silas shrugged. “I don’t know,” he said. “People aren’t going to buy that stuff. Not from me, anyway. It’s just a hobby.”
Stretching back out on the bed, I pulled Silas down beside me to face me. “You could do something really cool with this,” I said. “When you have talent like that, you shouldn’t waste it.”
“The talent I have is beating people up,” Silas said. “And even that isn’t exactly talent.”
“Is that what you’ve been doing?” I asked. I suddenly realized that Silas had been probing into what I’d been doing for the past seven years, pulling information from me piece by piece. Meanwhile, I knew only what I’d assumed about him, and that was turning out to be different from real life.
“What, since you left?” Silas asked. “I haven’t been doing anything much. Nothing important.”
“Tell me anyway,” I said, my hand smoothing the fabric of his t-shirt over his chest, feeling the harness of his muscles as they flexed underneath his shirt in response to my touch. “Did you get that scholarship you were up for in high school? The wrestling one?”
“To Oklahoma State?” Silas asked, his face reddening.
“What?” I asked. “Did I say something wrong?”
“No,” he said, shaking his head. “I mean, yes, I got the scholarship. No you didn’t say anything wrong. It’s just – I got kicked out.”
“You got kicked out of college?” I asked.
“It happened at the beginning of sophomore year,” he said. “After that I went to Albuquerque, worked some odd jobs and got on the fight circuit out there. There’s a lot of unofficial stuff in that area - MMA, boxing, that kind of thing. I’d fight anyone and anything, didn’t matter what it was.”