He wouldn’t hear me anyway.
He was lying on his bed when I walked in. He noticed me and turned off the music.
“Hey,” I said nervously.
“Hey.”
“Can we talk? I mean, we are going to talk whether you want to or not. I just wasn’t sure if you wanted to talk here or at my house.”
“We can talk wherever you want.”
“Okay...I guess I’ll start. Why have you been ignoring me?”
“I think you have it wrong. It’s you who’s been ignoring me.”
“You and I both know why I can’t be with you at school. But every time I try to meet up with you, you shoot me down. Why?”
“Maybe I’m sick of being your little secret. Maybe you need to see what it’s like.”
“Jesse, I’m sorry that I’ve hurt you. I just don’t know how to fix this.”
“Neither do I.” He sighed. “Look, it’s not just you who I’m pissed off at. My mom has been driving me nuts while she’s been packing for the last two weeks. She will be gone tomorrow, and I’m trying to accept that I’ll be alone.”
“But you’re not alone. You have me. Just hold on for a few more weeks until I turn eighteen. Once I do, I’ll scream that I’m with you from the roof at school. My mom can kiss my ass because I won’t have to live with her anymore. I’ll be an adult, and I know my dad will let me stay at his place here or pay the rent for an apartment.”
He studied me. “You won’t hide me anymore?”
“No. I’ve never wanted to hide you, but if anyone found out now, my mom would lock me in my room, and she’d find some way to have you kicked out of my school. We just have to wait until I can leave.”
“It was always there in the back of my mind that you were ashamed of me.”
“I could never be ashamed of you. Never.”
He pulled me down, so I was sitting next to him on the bed.
“I sound like a needy girl, but that makes me kind of happy. I thought we had things figured out when we were in London, but then everything went to shit as soon as we got back.”
“I know, and it’s my fault. I promise to fix this.”
“All right, I believe you.” He leaned over and kissed me.
“Let’s go to my house to hang out. My mom has a dinner thing, so she won’t be back until tomorrow. She always prowls those parties for some poor unsuspecting guy to sink her claws into.”
He laughed. “Poor bastard. I can’t wait until I get to meet her. After she hears what I have to say, she’ll love me even more.”
“It’s impossible for anyone to not love you. Well, except for her. I mean, you met my dad when he caught me naked in bed, and he still liked you. That’s charisma right there.”
“I’m lucky that he didn’t break my neck. Your dad is one scary motherducker.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Motherducker? Really?”
“Well, I didn’t want to call your dad a motherfucker, so I tamed it down.”
I shook my head. “Only you.”
He held my hand as we walked out of his room and down the hall to where his mom was taping boxes. Her eyes lit up when she noticed our linked hands.
“I see you two worked things out,” she said happily.
“We’re working on it,” I told her truthfully.
While we had made amends for right now, I knew things would still be uneasy between us until I could prove to him that I wasn’t ashamed.
“I’m glad to hear it. I told Emma that she’s in charge of taking care of you once I leave. You know I’m going to worry about you constantly.”
“I’ll be fine. We both know that I can take care of myself.”
“You know, I was just telling Jesse that I’m going to see if my dad will rent a place for me until I finish high school. Jesse could always move in with me instead of killing himself by working two jobs.”
“While I appreciate the thought, I don’t think that’s a good idea. I don’t approve of you two living together.”
“I’d make sure that it was a two-bedroom apartment,” I added.
“And I’m sure you two would sleep in your own beds. I’m not stupid,” she said as she grinned.
Jesse shrugged. “It’s not a bad idea as long as her dad lets me help with the rent.”
“Jesse—”
“It’s no different from me staying here by myself. You’ll be gone, and you won’t know how often Emma stays the night.”
This was getting awkward fast. It was embarrassing how he was basically telling her that we were having sex, and there was nothing she could do about it.
“Anyway, I’m ready if you are,” I said, hoping that he would stop talking.
“Let’s go. I’ll see you later, Mom.”
“Bye, Jesse. Be good.”
“Always am.”
“Why do I even bother?” she mumbled under her breath.
“I have no idea,” Jesse called as we walked out the door.
“You should be nicer to her. She is your mom, and she’s just trying to look out for you.”
“I know, but I’m kind of pissed at her for really leaving with this guy.”
“She’ll be thousands of miles away soon. You shouldn’t stay mad at her.
You need to take this time and cherish it. I’d kill to have a mom like yours.”