Shattered Ties




On the car ride back to his house, Jesse dropped a bomb on me. “My mom is moving to West Virginia with Mark, and she wants me to go with her.”

I had no idea what to say to that. I sat silently as I waited for him to continue.

“You can stop trying to break the steering wheel in two. I’m not going,” he said.

I glanced over at him. “What do you mean? You can’t stay here by yourself. Where would you live?”

“I can and will stay here by myself. I’ll still be in my shitty trailer. Money will be tight, but I’ll manage if I can find a second job.”

“How do you plan on working two jobs and going to school? You’ll wear yourself out.”

“It’s only for two years. Then, hopefully, Rick will let me pick up more hours.”

“Why are you staying? Be honest.”

He paused before answering. “Honestly? Because of you. I just found you, and I won’t leave you behind. Besides, Santa Monica is my home. I’m not going to give up everything.”

“But your mom will be thousands of miles away.”

“I know, and it sucks, but it’s her choice. I won’t hold her back.” “When is she leaving?” I asked.

“Soon,” he said shortly.

I knew that he was done talking about the move, so I let it go. The rest of the drive to his house was completely silent. Both of us were lost in our thoughts. I couldn’t believe that he was willing to stay here and work two jobs just so that he could be with me. I didn’t want him to leave, but I also didn’t want him to pick me over his mom. I was afraid that he would resent me for it later.

I dropped him off and headed to my house. The house was empty as I carried my bags up to my room. I sent my mom and my dad both a text to let them know that I’d made it home safely. My dad was the only one who responded—no surprise there. I spent the rest of my day washing laundry, still thinking about Jesse and his mom. I didn’t want either of them to hate me for Jesse’s decision to stay, but I didn’t want him to leave either.



School was just as I’d expected the next day and the rest of the week. Everyone was either terrified of Jesse or hated him. I hated that I had to keep silent as the whispers followed him through the halls, but I couldn’t take a chance on if people found out we were together and someone let it slip to my mom.

We only had a few weeks until my eighteenth birthday. After that, I wouldn’t have to hide Jesse from the world. I would be a legal adult, and I knew my dad would pay for me to stay someplace. I wouldn’t be trapped under my mother’s roof.

I was just hoping that Jesse would wait that long. I could see the resentment in his eyes when we would pass each other in the hallway, and I couldn’t say a word to him because my friends surrounded me. I’d texted him a few times to see if I could come over after school, but he always claimed that he had to work.

The next week was the same.

And the next.

Things were beyond tense when we were together, which wasn’t often. I tried to talk to Jesse about it, but he refused. I just kept telling him to give me a few weeks until I could move out, and then I’d announce it to the world.

Lucy knew what was going on, but she had no way to help me either. She knew I was hurt by the coldness Jesse was showing toward me, and she would try to cheer me up, but it was useless.

Every day, I felt like Jesse and I were being pulled further and further apart. I’d finally had enough of it one night, so I texted Jesse to tell him that he was coming to my house whether he liked it or not since my mom had a dinner she had to go to. It took him forever to reply, but he finally texted me back and agreed to let me pick him up at his house.

I didn’t care how long it took. I was going to make him see how much I loved him and just how hard it was to stay away from him while everyone bashed him at school. I would make things right between us. I had to. There was no way that I could deal with losing him.

I was nervous as I drove to Jesse’s. It felt like London had never happened and that we were hanging precariously at the edge of a cliff. One slip, and everything that we’d accomplished together would fall.

I was surprised to see that Jesse’s mom was home. I knew she worked the night shift, so it was unusual for her to be home this early in the evening.

“Hey, Emma,” she said when she answered the door.

“Hey. Is Jesse here?”

“Yeah, he’s in his room. Please ignore the mess. I’m trying to get everything packed and ready to go. Mark and I leave tomorrow.”

“Already? Jesse told me you were leaving, but I didn’t realize it was this soon.”

“He won’t talk about it, so I’m not surprised that he hasn’t mentioned it.”

“He really hasn’t talked to me period lately. It’s my fault though.”

“Well, go fix it. He’ll need you around more once I’m gone. I don’t want him to be alone.”

“He won’t. I’ll make sure of that,” I said as I walked back to his room. I could hear music blaring from inside the room, so I didn’t bother knocking.

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